newbie with grade 2-3 bladder prolapse

Welcome to this wonderful forum. You are in the right place now. Take a deep breath. You are going to be okay. The panic and fear that you now feel will pass as you educate yourself here and find a way to manage it all. You are not alone and that emotional place where you are now will soon calm as you take on the tools you need to improve your situation. Do not be alarmed by stages of degrees and exactly what kind of prolapse you have....they change all the time. You will hear back from many women here. I have been here about one year and my symptoms improved dramatically within 6 weeks of taking on the posture. One very lucky thing for you is that there is a WW practitioner in the UK. I dont know if she is close enough to you for a consultation, but even a phone consult can be great. I had one and it was wonderful. You are young and you will improve. Start now with the posture....standing tall but relaxed, lift your chest, relax your tummy, lift at the crown of your head which will slightly tuck your chin. This posture allows for a relaxed belly to breath into. Never tuck your tailbone under and pull in your tummy. That common practice has steered women wrong. As you read about this posture here (use the search box) you will learn little by little to be comfortable and to belly breath. That will gradually bring your organs back to their proper place nestled in front and above the pubic bone. Do not fear holding your baby.....you just need to learn this posture and then hold baby close to you to prevent straining. You are so worried now, but as you dedicate to this posture you will notice moments of improvement that grow. One position that helped me a lot was to rest on knees and elbows. This position helps the organs to find their way. If you can afford to purchase the bundle here, go for it. the book will give you a lifetime of information and reading it will help to calm you. The First Aid for Prolapse is a good place to start....slowly and a little at a time so that you can strengthen and learn the positions that will be good for you. Over time when the posture is second nature, you will see that you can do almost everything. Do not be afraid to post your questions ...there are some amazing ladies here to help you. Love and Best Wishes to you!

Hello again kam2481 ..... I left out a few things ---the kegel thing is not the way to go. There is much written here on that. Kegels and surgery are the most common things that doctors think of. Also, with your little one being so heavy, it will be important that you find the proper way to lift baby and to push in the pram. These things are addressed on the FAFP dvd but until you get that....be sure the height of your pram handle is a nice high height so you are not bending over. You want to stand tall when pushing and that is a very good time to practice posture. best wishes

Yes, it is difficult when used to slouching. If you can rest sitting on the floor with legs straight out in front of you, or on the floor or a little cushion with legs crossed in front of you, that is good. Above all, you want to keep your lumbar curve. Try not to force that. When your chest is lifted up and your shoulders relaxed and crown of head upward, your lumbar curve will be what ever it is. You will read on here from Louise and Surviving (I think) how their lumbar curves have improved with this posture. Mine is too actually. When pushing the pram, try to go slowly and stay in this beautiful posture. Walking is excellent for us with POP. Also, you are still PP with only a ten month old. It takes a couple of years to heal from the birth of your baby. This is such a good time for you to be learning this posture. Do you have any help at home with the baby? If so, take that help for the next few days or weeks while you adjust to the new you. No slouching just now and if you bend forward for baby, bend from your hips so that the lumbar curve stays beautiful. My best advice to you is to get the book and FAFP dvd but until they arrive, just keep posting. When I began this posture, I had a sore back and hips.....never now. There is great hope!

Hi again...sorry I am answering in stages, in between a million things I am doing just now. Sleeping does not usually present any problems since the gravity of being upright is not weighing on us. You can sleep, back, tummy or side. It is a good idea to put a pillow in between your knees when sleeping on your side ---since that helps to keep hips at a better setting. I will look back here for you later in case you have other questions that I might be able to help you with.

Hi Kam,

Just wanted to post to let you know you will be okay. Whenever you remember, check your posture is the Whole Woman posture. It will improve, maybe slowly. And it changes from day to day. I found the First Aid for Prolapse DVD to be the best help for me - it also helps train the body to get used to the new posture.

Go easy on yourself - remember you are your baby's best mother and don't be afraid to lift him when you need to. I find stress and tension leads me to slouch and hunch my shoulders - so as much as you can try to relax into posture and breathe "into your belly". And cuddling baby can be a big destresser too. Don't be afraid to lift him.

Kiko

Hi Kam,
I'm new to all this POP-Stuff, too. I begun walking with my baby, because my husband works all day and I wanted to do something for me and my cystocele. I carry my little boy (20 lb) in a carrier. I "wear" him on my front with his face to my breast. Then I walk in posture. You can also go shopping in this way. I enjoy it to have him so close to me and he likes it, too. Perhaps this is a possibility for you.
Best wishes
Butterfly

Hi kam,
Same! I was diagnosed with prolapse last year after my first baby at the young (?) age of 32. I got the first aid for prolapse DVD and found it excellent. It has a section about lifting babies and pushing the pram. My lil one is now 16 months and I still lift heaps, although I avoid it if I can which is rare! I try to focus on lifting with biceps (it feels like it makes a difference but not sure) and then get into posture straight away. I have ups and downs with prolapse, but I find this forum and the WW website always make me feel better and motivated. I've also been doing lots of crawling around on all fours playing chasey with my energetic toddler which makes me feel good as I'm being a good mum and helping prolapse at same time. Also, don't be hard on yourself, it's exhausting enough being a mum!

Hi kam, I have a similar story too - I have learned to lift usually by squatting or kneeling down to keep the lumbar curve as much as possible, using first my arms to get the load (usually the baby!) close to my body (with the baby, his head on my shoulder, one arm round his shoulders, the other under his bum) and then using my legs to push back up to standing. With laundry and groceries, I do the same thing, getting the load close to my body while keeping the posture as best as possible - I find bags that can go over my shoulder and I can clamp against my body with my arm, either angled more against my back or front very useful. It took me a while to get this sorted and it took a while for me to feel better in my body - and I still have a way to go in terms of pp recovery time and getting even better at the WW posture and other lifestyle changes. But I figure whatever I can do taking into account how a baby changes your life, the demands on your body, and the time and energy you have to do what you want to do (beyond being a good mum!) is at least building a foundation that will be there when child care is less physically demanding. I notice the annoying bulgy sensation of my POPs much less often now than in the earlier pp months - but tonight due to a series of awkward lurches and lifts today I am feeling it (kid is much more into climbing than walking and has needed a few sudden rescues today, man is he determined to climb!). But now I look forward to a fresh start in the morning, knowing how effective the WW posture is, especially walking in it. Read around the site, get whatever materials you can, and be assured this is a long term fix - you can keep improving for a long time and you can find ways to do almost everything you want to do.

kam, just read about where you live with all the hills and stairs - want to let you know that walking uphill in the posture is way easier than walking downhill especially when you have a pram to stop from rolling away - but getting the pram up those stairs sounds terrible - while you master the WW posture you might find it easier to maintain by carrying your baby as Butterfly described above. Here's a thread that might help explain a bit:
https://wholewoman.com/forum/node/5261
With downhill walking if you can zigzag a bit so you are descending slightly diagonally to the hill rather than with your feet pointing straight down it's easier to stay in posture.
Not sure about your other question, a search for 'swimming' and 'protruding bladder' in the box at the top left of the page will hopefully get some helpful results. I think I have read some ladies say swimming is no problem with a protruding uterus, and a lot of women here talk about using coconut oil to moisturise - lots of info here on the forum, enjoy :)

I remember feeling the exact same way as you. Devestation is an understatement. I am ashamed to admit I wanted to drive my car off a bridge.

I can only comment because I have been in that same dark space as you are now. First of all, your kids do need you, if you were to do anything you would be robbing them of a loving Mum and also setting them up for a lifetime without your guidance and support and will give them issues that don't deserve to deal with.

Emotionally it does get better, there are still dark days but nothing like when you first discovered it. It took me five months to see a little light from the clouds. Don't despair, it takes time but you will smile again.

You have to lift your child, I got told the same information as you about not lifting and I cried and cried and cried. How silly of people saying not to lift when you have a baby. Ideally, you shouldn't lift heavy things as it puts pressure on your pelvic floor, but you have to lift your child, just remember to do it in posture. Help yourself a little by buying a light weight pram and minimise lifting when you can. Other items I bought which have helped is a light weight vacumme cleaner and a step for my now 3 year old (my baby is 7 months old and I lift her all the time).

Find a good physio that specailises in womens health. They have to specialise in it as otherwise they have no idea what they are doing. I don't think I can post a link to other websites on here as this one is devoted to selling wholewomen stuff only, but if you google there is another forum called prolapse health, they are not selling anying. The reason I suggest it is because you might be able to ask the girls of a good womens physio in your area.

What I have learnt is that posture is the most important thing, and minimising pressure on the pelvic floor (don't go lifting concrete slabs).

Surgery does not have good success rates and in many instances there are complications, you only have to google to find this out. You can't go into surgery lightly, however, if your quality of life decreases that far that you are having thoughts to leave or end things then this may be a good option. there are some success stories. YOu must see a urogynancologist though, never go to a gynacolgoist about this. I am not suggesting this to you, you are early post partum and must try to manage it naturally first.

For now, take things one day at a time. I remind myself that I can still do a lot of things with my kids. I took them to zoo last week, lots of Mums were lifting their kids to see the animals, my son was aksing me to lift him. I knelt down and got him to climb up on my knee and stand up ( a tip from Louise). I felt sad I could not lift him, but quickly reminded myself how lucky I was to have this expereince with him, there are others much worst off than me.

I really feel for you, all I can say is emotionally it will get better.

Kam, this is one reason to start learning correct posture.....because when you are standing in excellent WW posture and especially if there is extra weight as when you are carrying a child - the weight-loading from above helps to make the vagina a closed, flattened, airless space. Protected from the organs moving into it. I haven't had any kids to carry for a few years now, but I haul plenty of stuff around with me every day, and if I lift carefully and then take the time to arrange my load evenly and close to my body (we're talking heavy tote bags and handbags here) my 'celes actually feel quite good! - Surviving

PS, there are various soothing substances women like to use. When I'm feeling irritation on the outside I just slap on a little diaper rash cream. Some use coconut oil, olive oil, and Christine and Louise make themselves a great salve from red clover. There is a video of this on the Resources tab under Living Arts.

Hi Kam

Can you figure out a way to use the pram as simply wheels, and leave it downstairs, or take it downstairs empty and load baby in as part of a second trip downstairs? Then do the reverse when you get home again.

I used to feel like a camel train any time I went out with my first baby. You get used to it after a while and get smart about what you *really* will need while out and about, so you are not carting around half the household. It is easy to see how new Mums can get housebound. It is just too hard going out. However, you have to shop at some point (or can you get groceries and stuff delivered???, just for a short time).

Don't think it will be like this forever. Postpartum Tunnel Vision is the new medical condition I just coined a name for. It is brought on by no longer being in reasonable control of what you need to get through in a week with a new baby, and the adjustments you need to make in order to keep tummies full, clean dishes available for putting food on, clean clothes available for when they are needed and germs away from where they really need to be germ free (that's not many places at all!). The condition manifests itself in the woman being so zoned in on her new baby and the needs of close, dependent family that she loses perspective of where she is in the continuum of her life, and forgetting that new babies are grown and off to Uni in time which seems like a universe away.

The preventative treatment and cure of PPTV is to have others around you so you can help each other, and particularly older women who have empty arms and hands, but any old, trusted, willing person is OK, when the going gets tough, eg, to help you to lift something heavy or hold the baby while you fold some washing. You don't need them around you all the time, but sometimes only 1 or 2 minutes of this treatment will make you feel much better, and enable you to do effortlessly what would otherwise remain undone, or done by you in a way that is detrimental to the wellbeing of your body and prolapse.

You will find that your perspective will return in the not too distant future. I am sure that we get like this because it is how babies get through the ultra-dependent stage. Other animals have young that can walk and run within a day of birth. I know. I used to eartag our new lambs on the day of their birth!

Hope these suggestions are food for thought. I may have missed the point.

Louise

I suggest that you Use a bike lock to ensure that the pram is still there when you get back. ;-)

Why does it get so damned hard when we have babies???!!!! I am sorry, but I haven't any ideas on safeguarding your shopping, which is a factor with shopping left in the street. You don't want to dump your baby in a hurry, just so you can scuttle downstairs and rescue the shopping and the pram, do you?

You can't get the shopping delivered, can you?

Could you park your baby with a friend for 30 minutes while you go grocery shopping, even sometimes?

I am sure you will find a workable solution to this. Load splitting is one of the really simple, clever things that you can do to literally lighten your load.

The other thing is that babies change all the time. You just get used to one stage and get all the techniques down pat, the baby goes through another development stage, and it all goes out the window. That's life.

Louise

Hello, I had to post on this as I also live in the UK and wanted to sympathise with you that you are not alone, I've had horrible treatment from the NHS, they would not even diagnose me with a prolapse for months, kept saying normal baggy skin, should be expected etc!!! Physio just says Kegals which made me much much worse, saw a male gyno who made jokes about using beads not in a sexual way!! And don't know what woman expect when having a child, all made me feel hopeless as no one told me it was normal after children. I cried and cried, wouldn't have sex, also felt I couldn't lift my baby boy who was 4 months. I still have good and bad days and wish I could have enjoyed my baby slightly more and got this when I was older I am 28. I have a bladder and bowel prolapse, trying to save me cervix!! I have curvature of the spine, chronic cough and I feel very alone with the medical system. But keep reading on here, don't give up and don't let it ruin you. I lift my little boy just squat and try to think about pulling him close, always thinking of posture and do the DVD as much as possible. Just bought number 2, I also worry and keep thinking is it getting worse but most of the time I think I can do this and you will get there as well. Take care and I stopped going to all Physio in the UK as they don't even know about prolapse and I left feeling worse xx