Which path to take!?!? Overwhelmed by the choices...

Submitted by mamahawk14 on March 7, 2017 - 1:28am
Body: 

Hi Everyone! I hope ya'll can offer me some personal experiences to help direct me on a path to recovery. Here is my story... sorry it's a bit long - I hope you can stick with me.

10w pp with my first, I felt a bulge "down there" and upon inspection, discovered what I self diagnosed to be stage 1-2 rectocele. Now I can't remember exactly when I stopped having symptoms, just that I was "ready" to try for another baby at 9mo pp, and I KNOW I wouldn't have been ready if I was still experiencing symptoms, so it must have lasted anywhere from 3-6 months.

Fast forward to 10w pp with my 2nd... when I started having the "bulge" again. This time it seemed worse, occurring more often and more severe. I finally went to the obgyn last week, (20w pp) where I was diagnosed with Stage 3 Rectocele, Stage 1 Bladder and Uterus. He said the only cure is Surgery, that it was broken and CANNOT repair/heal on it's own by any form of exercise, etc. Also, he said I can use a Pessary in the meantime if I want more kids, or until I decide if surgery is right for me.

I reached out to a L&D nurse friend, who so happens that this is one of her "soapboxes". She has recommended the following:
1. Squatty Potty. (already have one for over a year now)
2. Pelvic Floor Physical Therapist (I don't think my "medical aka obamacare" will cover that...)
3. Check if I have Diastasis Recti - I checked, pretty shallow and 2 fingers at belly button, one finger above and below.
4. Online Course from the Tummy Team
5. Fit2b.com exercises - all "tummy safe"
6. Videos she has from Julie Tupler of the "Tupler Technique"
7. Gyneflex
8. Trim Healthy Mama - Diet (and Exercise that just came out)

I feel so overwhelmed by the amount of things and techniques out there.

Meanwhile...my dear husband recommends the "no water" diet. He believes (and tested this for a month on himself lol) that we should go without drinking water, getting our water intake from fresh fruits and mainly veggies, avoiding eating and drinking things that would cause our need to drink water, i.e. breads, caffeine, alcohol, red meats.

I miss being "myself". I recognize part of that is due to having 2 babies under 2... and having to "die to myself". But I was planning on being back into running and yoga and soccer, etc. by now. I'm frustrated that just being on my feet, hand washing dishes, cooking and baby wearing aggravates my rectocele. I would have liked the option to have more children as I'm only 30... but as it looks right now, my almost 5mo will be my last. :(

Please help direct me. I'm so lost right now and trying to not spiral into depression over the breakdown of my body. It's heartbreaking to have such wonderful pregnancies and home births... to my body doing this afterwards. Thank you in advance for any and all you can input.

Forum:

Old Fashioned Life

March 7, 2017 - 8:17am

Hi MamaHawk,

Whole Woman Posture is amazing. It has helped me tremendously.

When my youngest was only a couple months old, I noticed a bulge that felt between the size of a ping pong ball and a tennis ball. I was scared and embarassed. I went to the ob/gyn and was diagnosed with a cystocele and told to do kegels and it would get better. Was also told about vaginal weights that I could use if I wanted (those seemed like something I didn't want to try). Over the next two years I did the kegels sometimes but wasn't faithful about doing them. My cystocele continued to get worse til it was like a tennis ball there all the time. I was miserable, I went back to the ob/gyn and was told that I needed surgery but I would not be able to lift for the rest of my life. Told him that wasn't possible as I lift up to 50 lbs daily (that was during the summer when we had calves needing 5 gallon buckets of milk, and also harvesting the garden with bushels of veggies and canning them). I asked about a pessary and he told me I was too young for one, only elderly woman who don't have sex anymore use them. I asked him why and he said that you can't have sex with one in. I told him that I would just take it out for that. He insisted I wouldn't be able to do that. Well I told him I wanted to try and was scheduled for another appointment to get fitted for the pessary. When I went back for the pessary fitting, he still was trying to talk me out of it and into surgery. I did get the pessary and asked about taking it out and he kept insisting I wouldn't be able to but I tried in front of him and shocked him when I got it out on the second try.

About the same time that I went to the ob/gyn to get the pessary. I also started working on the Whole Woman posture. I now do the Pee On/Pee Off exercises almost daily to help me become stronger and better able to hold the posture. Even though I can lift 50 lbs I am very out of shape. It has been just over six months and I am happy to share that I can go without my pessary some days without any discomfort. I could probably go without it more often, but I am too afraid to try to go without it as even though it is the end of winter I still am lifting a lot. We heat with wood with a wood cookstove that I also do all of our cooking/baking on/in during the winter. When bringing the wood in the house we use a dolly laid down, when it's full of wood lifting it is quite a bit to pull it in the house.

Of the things you mentioned I haven't heard of or haven't researched. I do remember talk of the squatty potty here, you could do a search on this site and see what others have said about it. The pelvic floor physical therapist from what I've read here usually teaches the kegel exercises which Christine discusses - here is a link to that https://info.wholewoman.com/optin-8548007.

From my experience the Whole Woman Posture has helped me and I will not have surgery. Christine also has several yoga videos. You can find these in the Whole Woman Store. I have these videos but my body is too out of shape to be able to do them comfortably. I am working on getting in better shape and hope to include these yoga videos in my daily routine soon.

Please read as much as you can on this forum and on the Whole Woman web page. There have been others that have went on to have more children after discovering their prolapse. If you wish for more children it is definitely possible. As for myself I don't think I will have any more, I have five children now from the ages of 3 to 21. My last 4 babies have all been high risk due to my age. My husband says no more kids and I am starting to agree that at the age of 46 I probably shouldn't have any more. If I was younger and my husband and I wanted more children I would definitely have them though. Wishing you the best.

Aging gracefully

March 7, 2017 - 9:21am

Hi mamahawk,
There are also many products for our postpartum moms in the whole woman store, including a postpartum bundle which would be a fabulous start into this work.

Surviving60

March 9, 2017 - 4:46am

I don't see anything of value in your friend's list of suggestions. Yes it is a little overwhelming but Christine has boiled it all down to what the real issues are, and thousands of us owe our quality of life to her work. Watch this for an overview and then come on back with your questions. - Surviving
https://wholewoman.com/newpages/video/ww101.html