Activity level

hi katygal
first, I moved your post here, I thought this forum was better suited for your questions.

before I found my prolapse I was always up and doing something - or three things. nursing while cooking dinner and managing arts and crafts projects and breaking up a fight all at once was typical. kept the house spotless and neat and organized. never sat for longer than the time it took to read a story to the kids. always on the go.
had the same issues initially...afraid to be far from a toilet, uncomfortable walking too much. the weekend I found the cystocele we went to the mall. two hours of HELL. came home, went to bed and cried.

but NO you WILL NOT have to sit at home while dh gets to enjoy life with the kids. I don't.
but...

for now, do slow down. I've stopped multitasking and ya know what? somehow, it all (well, mostly) still gets done. and you know what else? I'm a better mother this way. I sit with the kids more and am living in the moment. the kids have really responded well to this. only drawback is that I gained a couple of pounds (like 3) and I cannot get rid of them. I think its because I'm moving less (refuse to believe its age creeping up on me!).

sitting around all day IS draining. so go out, but take it one step at a time. go somewhere for 20 min, or a short walk in WW posture. then come home and rest. just for starters.

kegels, well, I personally don't do them anymore. but hands and knees is a fav. position for me. its how I pick up the toys at the end of the day and play with my toddler. he thinks its the funniest thing ever.

resting on the sofa with your legs up? you mean you're on your back? silly position I think. all this does is allow your bladder to fall back when you really want it forward.

surgery inevitable? I think not.

do you have a prolapsed bladder as well? maybe. everything is connected, so its very possible that if you have a cystocele, your bladder is low too. is that cause for alarm? not really. and it could change from day to day, which could explain the different opinions you got.

the way I see it, its like this: YOU must become the expert on your body. midwives, dr's, they really don't know what to do with a prolapse aside from kegels and surgery. but YOU know, because you are here. so how bad is your prolapse? only YOU can tell. the grade doesn't matter. what it looks like doesn't matter. only your symptoms matter, because you want to enjoy life! prolapse is not going to kill you, so you can safely put off surgery for as long as you like. and while you're busy putting off surgery, you can implement the posture and exercises here to help reduce your symptoms. and it works for many of us.

I can tell you that I go along with my dh and kids, and run around with them, and carry them, and run after them while they learn to ride a bike, and I am no worse for the wear.
of course I do still have the occasional bad day, usually right before my period and I take it easy on those days. I've learned to respect my body and my cycles and its ok to have sandwiches for dinner so I don't have to stand in the kitchen for an hr. its ok to let the laundry pile up for a day so I can baby my body when I need to.

I think you have some inner wisdom there, knowing that there is benefit in slowing down. we're so conditioned to always be going going going and to accept the increasing amounts of stress as par for the course and it just plain can't be good for us. I worry about women who rush to have surgery so that they won't have to slow down (not saying that's the thought behind all who choose surgery). personally, now that I'm done with the mourning/grief thing and wishing the prolapse away, I'm able to see that things really did have to change and probably wouldn't have if I hadn't developed the prolapse.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that life is good. even with the prolapse.

you know what, katygal, not only can you learn to live with this, but it really might go away. probably not completely, but to the point where its no longer a concern. have you gotten started with the posture yet?
aside from the posture, the most helpful exercises for me are the firebreathing (in the book), the plies (in the book) and alemama's ab vacuum (or nauli, search the forum for it). for me, it took time to see change. like a year. seemed like an eternity then, but now it seems like it happened so quickly. so yes, learn to live with it, hold on to perspective whenever it hits you (so sorry about your good friend, 53 is so young!) but also, be proactive. aside from the physical benefits, it feels good to DO something about it rather than just hope and pray and live in fear of needing surgery.
you'll be ok, I can hear it in your posts.

I'm off to bed now

yep I went through it too- 3 kids under 5- nursing baby- as close to perfect as I could get the house- dinner on the table. Man was I sad to give that all up.
I don't know where the post is but I wrote a post recently about our family beach trip last year and this year and how very different the two were. So much changes in a year- but I have held onto the more relaxed feel even as I have been more and more able to be active. Picking up toys and things on my hands and knees has been wonderful-
I love elbows and knees for reading stories to the kids- downward dog (yoga move) has been great for lengthening my hamstrings.
Last year at the beach I read books the entire time on elbows and knees- I did walk on the beach in the mornings and evenings - but during the day I stayed in with the baby- maybe did some laundry or made a meal. This year I was throwing the frisbee, flying kites, riding bikes, body surfing in the waves- just had a wonderful time and my POP didn't move.
Your mom is right (hehe) when you are not constantly picking up your baby it will help-but so will the passage of time and the postpartum healing you still have left to do. I still carry my almost 2 year old- but it is rare- he even climbs into the car seat with out help.

I am so glad to have slowed down. I really know my limits now- say no when it is all too much and don't feel bad about it. I really enjoy my kids. AND my husband HELPS ME. All I have to do is ask on the long days and he jumps right in. I think he likes to be necessary- sure he liked not having to do anything ever- but it is even better when he can 'rescue' me.

My big baby keeps taking my hands off this keyboard or I would write more- You are not alone and it is better this way.

Hi
I'm in much the same position. I have 4 kids, used to being busy and active, and now find I'm very sore most days from a 'mild' cystocele. I can't lift my little one, carry the washing or do most of the housework. I took the kids to the park and ended up sat in the buggy myself after 15 mins. They don't understand and I feel bad for them. I don't have any incontinence, just the pain. My gynacologist is good, and says he is very conservative about surgery. I've had several months of physio which hasn't helped, he is now sending me to a urologist to rule out anything else, then after that I can have an anterior repair. This is a cross stitch type op, not mesh, and I'm hoping it will help, as at the moment I have very little life at all, and its very hard on my husband, family and grandparents.
Poppyrose x

hello there
welcome to the site
don't know how long you've had your prolapse, or how much reading you've done here, but I recommend you read the faq's if you haven't already.
know that surgery is far from a definite fix, the very risk of adverse effects is very real and includes pain, pain during intercourse, and incontinence. also risk of developing subsequent prolapse of the uterus. many women find themselves needing repeat surgeries and its been well documented that repeat surgeries are even less successful.
my advice to you is to put off surgery for a bit (at least 6 mo to a year) and in the interim, learn about the posture and exercises here and give it a shot.
in a nutshell, the wholewoman posture positions your organs over bone instead of over an open hole (the vagina), preventing anything from falling out. in addition, we're working towards the goal of reshaping fascia, the stuff that wraps around all of our organs and muscles giving support and holding things where they should be. after years of non-wholewoman posture and obstetrical interventions, fascia becomes stretched out and misshapen and can no longer function effectively.
once a woman opts for surgery there is no going back. once your fascia and muscles have been cut and the structure altered, you will not have a later opportunity to try managing and/or reversing prolapse naturally. so it just makes more sense to try it this way first. and then, if after a year or so, things are still unbearable and you opt for surgery, at least you will know that you've tried everything and you are going into it with your eyes wide open.

feeling that you have very little life at all is not a way to live. but I can tell you that I felt that way initially, and I don't anymore. I am living very well with my prolapse and aside from a day or so here and there it doesn't interfere with my life at all (I'm also a mom of 4 under 10 so I know all about the lifting and bending and running that that lifestyle entails).

stick around a bit, do a bunch of reading and ask any other questions you might have

you may try to get some super lubrication going and see if it helps the pain. The posture got rid of my tailbone pain in a few weeks- it was amazing.

MY little 'friend' (well not friend lol) Is busy doing her peekerama again. More than likely because I have been exceptionally busy this past week or so - Far more than normal. I call it POPpy as the name POPpy is far less scary and upsetting to me than Prolapse... lol

I have come to the conclusion that activity levels increasing alot - Make it worse. BUT - I have no intention of spending my days sat here 24/7 so POPpy and I will battle on...

I continue my 'mantra' *This causes me no pain, I will not die from this, It will not end my days* And move on...

I have the thought that for me (Not knowing what the others here deal with exactly) - My Uterus is pressing down on my bladder it seems (From feelerama etc) Thats what I am deducing anyways... The bladder is the bit I can feel peeking - Prolly cos of being presed upon and forced to do so... But I am wondering - What does a diapragm look like? IF I had a kind of bendy circular ring thing. Iith a centra to it (Kinda like mini bile wheel but soft) It would stop mine peeking. But you never know until you make up testers to see how it would feel.

Mine had been so very good - Until this past two weeks of realllllllllllllllll business. But - No pain or anything - Just peekerama. I will - In time - Find a way to make peekerama avoided ;-) On days when you have no choice but to spend hours and hours and hours being busy

This is lige tho gals - Mine is a Grade 3 - I am STILL living a busy - happy - And a whole life. - :-)

All is well...

Oh and next weekend I am out and about too at a completely MASSIVE picnic where tonssssssssssssssssssssssss of people are going - So that will be fun (If the weather stays good) After that I might takje me a lil rest - lmao

Hope all are well...

Sometimes youre holding someone else's heart in your hands. You can drop that heart & bruise it. You can squash that heart & hurt it. Or you can stomp on it & totally annihalate it. You stomp on that heart or bruise it. It can forever be changed ♥

Hi Sue,

I am sorry to hear you are having bad days with your "POPpy". I hate those days. Thank goodness they are few and far between. I too find that the busier I am, the better the chance that I am going to have a bad day that day or the next. However, our grandsons (7 & 10) were just here for a looong weekend and for the first time ever, when they've been here, my prolapse wasn't a problem. It's not like I just sat around either. We took them boating, swam in the pool, went to the beach and played frisbee with the dogs. Go figure!

Sometimes I think problem days are even more related to what I eat. DH and I have been watching what we eat because we gained a few pounds with our vacation. Maybe that explains why it wasn't a problem this time when they boys were here. I think I'm going to keep a diary of everything I do and eat each day and see if I can find some kind of pattern that would explain the good and the bad days.

Have you given up on the sponge? That use to work so well for you.

Hope you feel better soon!

Warmest regards,

Mae

I have not given up the sponge - Just had not felt the need to use it much at all - Until the last few days lol

I think food could also be something as being so busy you eat - rubbish!

So when things settle a bit - All should be well again

I am still looking into my scientific sponge alternative thing... I would make this thing out of a silicon(ish) type stuff and it would be held by the 'spokes of the wheel' but also be able to bend in one direction for insertion. IF this worked (and it prolly wouldnt lol) It would stop peeking for people with a stage 3 when they are no their feet tons and tons. The silicon would be soft(ish) enough to not cause pressure much (I hope)

I know a tampon sideways works - But isnt the best tghing I would wanna use - And the spoke of the 'wheel' (WWW Whole Woman Wheel? lol) would give it stability and let secretions from the body through the gaps... One day I will test this out - lollllllllll - And It will no doubt fail - hehehe - Something to think about anyways and it is the kind of thing you would be able to use when and where you wanted - If needed.

I am sure things have been a lil worse because of the stuff I have been up to. Such is life - All will be well :-)

Sometimes youre holding someone else's heart in your hands. You can drop that heart & bruise it. You can squash that heart & hurt it. Or you can stomp on it & totally annihalate it. You stomp on that heart or bruise it. It can forever be changed ♥