Newbie: Where do I start?

Submitted by twomalamutes on June 23, 2009 - 11:16pm
Body: 

Hello everyone -

I am 65 and I have been diagnosed with a 3rd degree cystocele and 1st degree rectocele. I had my uterus removed about 25 years ago and then 15 years ago had my ovaries removed. I do have a cervix, but that is all. I first noticed the pelvic floor collapse about a year ago. I consulted with a gynecologist last winter and tried three different pessaries and none of them worked. My feeling is that the extent of the collapse and the amount of sagging tissue is too great to handle a pessary. It’s like trying to hold up a tent with a frisbee!

I was scheduled for surgery to “repair” the pelvic floor collapse but in the pre-op visit, I learned that my doctor only has a 70% success rate and the recovery period would be at least 8 weeks of total inactivity. I decided that the low odds and risk of complications (including possible urinary problems) outweighed the potential benefits and I cancelled the surgery. I have been using vaginal estrogen for about 4 months and it doesn’t seem to improve anything. My years of Kegels have not paid off.

I have begun to experience fecal incontinence that is most upsetting, embarrassing, and frustrating. I had an accident in a public place on Saturday. I am getting to be afraid to leave home for fear of having an accident. I am an active person. I play a mountain dulcimer for hospice patients and at community events, and I am scheduled to attend a couple of dulcimer festivals/workshops this summer, but now I am thinking that I might have to cancel my reservations and plane tickets.

I'm glad to be here and hope to meet some fellow travelers on this road so that I can learn how to cope with the problem and whether there is anything I can do to improve the quality of my day to day life. I will be very thankful for any tips or encouragement you all might have.

"twomalamutes" aka Judith from Pennsylvania

louiseds

June 24, 2009 - 2:22am

Hi Judith

Glad you have found us, and I hope we can help you to find some solutions and workarounds for the difficulties you face, and help you to heal your heart so you can smile again as you play your dulcimer. If your body makes a mistake while you are playing in the nursing home I think it would have about as much effect on the people around you as swotting a few mozzies would have on the prevalence of malaria in the world.

Believe me, those people you are playing for will be thinking of you as an angel, not as just another woman with an embarrassingly broken body. Giving them your music is a wonderful thing to do. I guess it feeds you as well.

At worst, we are women who understand the grief of having a pelvic region with a not very useful brain of its own. I am glad you have joined us. I am sure the women who have had hysterectomies will be posting to you soon. Just didn't want you to feel like you are the only woman in the room.

Cheers

Louise