Help!! Young first time mum.

Hi there and welcome to Wholewoman. I know that you are terrified right now, I was too when I first discovered my prolapse 4 weeks postpartum (I'm 27 btw). If only I had known then what I know now! It would have saved me a lot of grief! For what it's worth, postpartum prolapse is extremely common. I come from a family of doctors, and they all agree that it happens to pretty much everyone whose had a baby. Some of us are just too curious!
So to answer your questions.
You can have sex! In fact I find that sex is just as great as it ever was.
Your partner will not notice.
You can have as many babies as you like, and you won't have to have c-sections.
It will probably get much, much better. You will always be different down there prolapse or not, but for the most part postpartum prolapses seem to heal quite well. Mine was pretty scary at 4 weeks. Now at 8 months I don't notice anything unless I'm constipated (which is about once month)
Now here are some good prolapse rules to live by!
Try not to check yourself. It will not help at all. It will only make you an anxious wreck.
Try to limit your online research. Trust me sister, I've read everything google has to offer. Any useful info will be on this website.
Please feel free to ask questions. Don't be embarassed. We are all in the same boat here!
Start learning the posture.
Congratulations on your new baby! I miss the newborn phase. They grow too fast!

hi there and welcome to the site

you are not being over dramatic in the least. finding a prolapse is shocking/terrifying. and it took me a while to build up the courage to tell my dh and I was 33 with 7 years of marriage (and three kids) behind me. its really not an easy thing to wrap your mind around.

but really, you can have good sex. you can have babies. you can have natural childbirth. you can have your life.

I think the trick is proper management. first thing I'd say is make sure you don't get constipated. the pressure and the straining are just not good for you. drink lots of water (especially if you are breastfeeding) and eat lots of fiber.
learn the posture. it takes time to 'get' it, but its time well spent. the posture will help you position your pelvic organs where they belong - in your low belly over the pubic bone, rather than pushed back over the vagina where they can prolapse.

and as you know, 7 weeks is so early, much too early to even guess what will be by the time your prince has his first birthday.

Hi Mummytoaprince

I cannot think of anything that Lyricmama and Granolamom have not said, except to say that a penis is the best organ repositioner known to womankind! Don't hurry it. You will need long loving at first, cos your lactation will be drying your vagina. Fear not, you will lubricate as normal, with his loving patience.

Just get your posture organised, good quality diet, clothing loose around your belly, then wait for another 10 months before considering that you are anywhere near completely reverted from pregnancy. After a year you will have some idea, but the reversion goes on in more subtle ways for years. By that time you will probably hardly notice any remaining prolapse, or if you do, it will be quite manageable, because you will have rebuilt trust in your body and your ability to use it in ways that are supportive of its natural structures.

I am sure we will hear from you again, as you work out how to do all these things. Start with the FAQ's on the main site.

Cheers

Louise

HI Mummytoaprince,

Huge congrats on your gorgeous new baby.
Just to echo what others have said--it is shocking and scary and upsetting, no matter where in life you are at. But, rest assured, it's also something you get through. We've all been there, and come to another place of acceptance and living with POP.
Being in the UK, the great thing is that (hopefully!) your doctor should be quite relaxed about this and not trying to push surgery. In general, the attitude is that they don't see you again about the POP until baby is 1 years old or you stop breastfeeding, because soooo much healing happens in that first year no matter what.
They will possibly suggest physiotherapy which will probably just be kegels / pelvic floor exercises. On the left hand menu, scan way down to the blogs, and read about kegels the right way. You can sort this out on your own. I found my physio lovely for emotional support, but most don't offer more than pelvic floor exercises--and some way too many which makes it worse! so just be aware. they may refer you to a specialist (ie urogynecologist) depending on where in the UK you are, but again, they won't suggest anything other than physio and just let your body heal.
But luckily you found this place!!!!

as mentioned, number one thing is to sort the constipation, and avoid it at all costs as it plays havoc on a rectocele if that is indeed what you have.

re your husband, i think you will find that 1. he loves you like mad so just wants you to be okay 2. they just can't quite imagine what's going on anyway, so it's not so graffic and doesn't freak them out like it does us (it's our bodies!) and 3. He'll never feel it especially as if you are lying down, it goes away. (be aware of that for getting checked--if a POP is mild, it will just disapear when you lie down, so doctors who haven't seen a lot of them won't find it....)

Also, it probably feels like you are the only young woman with this. Know that if you take a group of women who have babies, no matter what the age, a large number have / have had prolapses, incontinence issues etc...they just don't talk about it--i found when i started being open about what was going on with me, lots of women were open back and wow, a whole other world opened up! But i am around insanely open women who talk about their bodies post childbirth at the pub on a friday night ;-)

so, onto the posture, and all else mentioned by others. and keep posting. this forum was a lifeline for so many of us at the beginning, because you can ask anything and everything and voice how you are feeling, and the fab women here help get you through....

Hello mummytoaprince! I agree wholeheartedly with these other ladies, but if you are anything like me it will help to hear positive things repeated as much as possible!

I came here when I was at the same stage you are now. I was really scared and fearful, as well as a bit angry that I'd ended up with a prolapse after my first baby at the ripe old age of 27! At seven weeks, I could see a my bulge easily using a hand mirror. Now, I am a little less than 4 months pp and from the outside everything looks absolutely normal! And even better--I feel "normal" as I go throughout my day. At the beginning I had the misplaced tampon feeling, some pressure, the feeling that I ALWAYS had to pee, and just general discomfort in that area. Now, however, I have none of those things! I have even gone back to work full time to a job where I am on my feet all day and I feel great! In fact, after work today I walked downhill at a brisk pace, pushing the jogging stroller, while on my period (usually when symptoms are the worst), and I felt absolutely no discomfort or pressure. And that's with less than 4 months of healing! Oh, and to echo the other ladies, sex is not a problem. Kind of like Louise said, it's great for sort of nudging things back in place. :)

Please try to stay positive and listen to lyricmama and stay off google! I never google anymore (mostly because I, too, have read anything there is to find online) and it makes a big difference in my mindset. You WILL heal from where you are now. You WILL have your life back. And, if you take some of the suggestions from this site and implement them, I think you'll heal even more. When I was 7 weeks pp, I read lots of positive stories and encouraging posts on the site, but I didn't REALLY believe I would heal until I started to see it for myself--really noticing changes in the past month. You will see it too, but it is sooooo slow!

Blessings to you, and don't forget to enjoy your baby. I spent several weeks in the beginning so wrapped up in the world of prolapse that I had a hard time connecting with my little girl. Now I wish I had that time back! She is truly the light of my world and this is all worth it to have her as the prize!

mzimm