Need help and encouragement.

I have four children, ages 7, 4 1/2, 2 1/2 and 4 months. They have all been born naturally by midwives, three of them at home. Never in a million years would I have thought I'd have pelvic organ prolapse.

Ever since the birth, I've had digestive troubles. It usually takes about a week after a baby for my digestive system to get back to normal, but this time it never did. Just terrible constipation, and no dietary changes or supplements or fiber increases are helping. When I was giving birth, my midwife had me stop as I was pushing, and deliver her very slowly. She saw then that my cervix and uterus were prolapsed, and she said I had to stay in bed for 6 weeks to recover. She said in her experience as a labor and delivery nurse, and then 15 years as a midwife, the women who took time to heal didn't need their insides tacked back up when they hit 50. The women who jumped back to the kitchen a few days after giving birth had to have bladder slings. So I was a good girl and stayed in bed. When she checked me next, I was doing much better. She thought it was caused by our recent move (only a couple of weeks before the birth), and I moved boxes that were way too heavy for me to be moving. She said muscles stretched to capacity aren't made to move like that, and she thought that's why it happened. So everything was okay. Then we were very sick for about 3 months with a terrible cough (which turned into pneumonia for me), so I didn't have much time to think about how my insides were feeling, except I felt like I was undoing all those Kegels I'd been doing--because I was coughing so hard. I went on my merry way, although I did note that I was very constipated and my back had hurt since the birth and was getting progressively worse. I saw the chiropractor numerous times, but to no avail.

So my midwife said to go see the OB, who I've seen throughout the last two pregnancies. I saw him this past Tuesday. He took one glance and said, "Uh, yeah. I can SEE your cervix right there." He poked around for a while and gave me the verdict: I have a prolapsed uterus, cervix, bladder and colon. I asked him if he thought my back pain was caused by the pelvic floor muscles not doing their job, and pulling my back out of whack and he said that sounded about right to him. He's not recommending surgery at this point because we don't know if we're done having kids. He said if he did it now, and we had another baby, it would ruin all his hard work and he'd have to redo it again.

I asked him if he thought it would be unwise to get pregnant again and have more, and he said, "No, it's not dangerous, but you think your back hurts now--just wait till you're carrying 30 extra pounds. ["50," I said. "I gain 50+ when I'm pregnant."] It's going to be excruciating, and you will do more damage to your organs next delivery. This isn't going to get better." So. We have a lot to think about and pray about. He said he wanted me to get an MRI done to rule out anything more serious.

I'm going to get a second opinion. He used words and phrases I didn't like. He said things like, "When you have a baby, all your muscles just rip apart. It shreds your body." Um...I'd like to see somebody who respects reproduction as a good thing, not just a necessary evil that ruins your body. So I'm going to call up a different, more local midwife and see what she recommends before I even get an MRI done. He said exercises wouldn't do much good for my insides, but it might relieve the back pain some. I don't think, after reading this website, that I agree with him.

He also said that he is a surgeon (I didn't know that), and that he does all his work himself and that (he grinned) he does an excellent job if he does say so himself.

Hm. Second opinion? Comin' up.

I saw the chiropractor again Wednesday and it actually did seem to help with the back pain a little. He recommended getting an MRI too, just to see where things were.

I'm so thankful to have been referred to this site by a friend of a friend.

For the first time I feel hopeful.

I don't want surgery. I'm too young for this (I'm 32). Everybody I've mentioned this to expresses surprise that it could happen to anybody who hasn't been through menopause.

Here's a question: If I do all the exercises recommended, about how long should it take before I'm back closer to normal? We don't want to be faced with the possibility of not being able to have more children. We'd like one more at least. But besides all the prolapse stuff, my mom just informed me that EXTREMELY early menopause runs in our family. As in 30-35. My sister, who is 29, is already taking hormone replacements. That's INSANE. So not only do I have prolapse staring me in the face, I also have menopause staring me in the face. On the one hand, I've got my mom saying, "If you're going to have more kids, you better go ahead and do it." On the other hand, I've got to wait till my organs are back into position before I even think of getting pregnant again.

Decisions, decisions.

What wonderful ladies you all are. Just reading yesterday and today I feel like I'm already at home here!