how about a "who am I " forum?

hi gardengirl,
we've explored various gallery ideas in the past and one reason we haven't done it is that many (most?) of the women on the forum have not been keen on the idea of having their pictures show up on google when someone searches on prolapse related terms. there are ways around the google problem, but even most of our moderators are very private about their identities, and understandably. it is a conundrum of whole woman: people want to build friendships but are reluctant to take off the mask of the username.

you may recall when you first signed up for the forum, we caution against using your real name as a screen name because if you use your real name, your whole woman forum posts will show up on a google search under your name. given that employers, divorce lawyers and who knows who else are using google, facebook and other online sources for information, something as intimate as prolapse doesn't seem to be something women are anxious to publicize.

we're open to suggestions, however and our first priority is making the village as valuable to members and participants as possible. feedback?

lanny

Lanny, I think the privacy issue is a big one. We are on the Web, that democratic, chaotic, free(?)dom space that anyone can use as they wish. Every person with Internet access can find us, and that is wonderful for women who don't know we exist. Thanks for making us so publicly available.

However, even celebrities, who make an art form of, and and a living from, being 'seen' like to have some privacy. Likewise we don't wear a t-shirt every day that has our whole biography and all our personal details painted all over it when we go into town. We probably wouldn't even wear it to a family gathering. In fact we might not wear it at all.

Facebook, LinkedIn and the like produce a similar conundrum. How much do you write about yourself. Are there parts of yourself that you only want certain people to know about? So some parts of you not 'fit' with other parts. Does one part of you contain stuff that is TMI? Do you respect the sensibilities of those who are sensitive about TMI and not put that stuff up. Do you unnecessarily put your relationships at risk by being completely open. Of course you do. We all have to deal with social networking sites in the way that is best for us. I do have one close friend who has two identites on Facebook because he doesn't want to mix the two sides of his life. These two men are Friends. There is nothing dodgy about it. He just wants to keep the two separate.

The Wholewoman Village is different. It is dealing with the identities and details about *other* people, and some of it is TMI too. You have an ISP, a banking system etc which could reveal personal information if something goes wrong, as it did for me the other day when my Skype account, my Paypal account and my creditcard were all hacked. It is all fixed up now, and we have a new creditcard, but I feel that the less identifiable information that is out there, the better.

Some of us personally share photos and other personal details by private email. I would rather see the Village not embark on publishing identifiable photos, unless the person specifically OK's it. I think it is safer for Members and safer for Wholewoman. If Members want to publish their own identifiable photos they can do it on something like Photobucket or Flickr.

Not sure about the USA and other parts of the world but Australia has frighteningly strict privacy legislation. It can make it very hard to find out information for bona fide reasons, but I am very glad it is there. My little creditcard incident, which was completely out of my control (I had done all the right things) showed my that information sometimes gets into the wrong hands, and I wouldn't like you guys to have to mop up the mess if it happened, and all went pear-shaped.

I am glad you raised it. Let' see what others think.

Louise

I like your spunk. We all need to talk about POP more with other women. Keep thinking about ways we can de-stigmatise it and treat it as the common condition that it is. I think 'coming out' to female family and friends first is important, no, it is our responsibility! So they can learn about it too, young women especially, even if they do find it TMI. They just need to get over it.

*Not* mentioning it is betraying all women, whether or not they have POP.

So, take a deep breath Ladies.

Get out there and come clean to the women you love in the name of educating all women! they will understand you better, and will be better informed. they may also save themselves from surgical repairs some day, as has happened to many women who have arrived here, fresh POP diagnosis in hand, and grief stricken.

Now that would be worthwhile!!!

Louise