OMG-falling fannies and lounging vaginas

Submitted by gardengirl on September 22, 2010 - 5:18am
Body: 

I recently had a bit of a revelation regarding our delicate and sensitive female issues.
I was fortunate to get a 45 minute appointment with a female GP in a nearby town who specialises in women's health.
What a great visit. I went armed with my books and a printout of "why Kegels do not work".
I found a GP who listened and was open to new ideas (she should be ordering her WW book any day). She was impressed with what I had to say and has asked me to join her for coffee in December when her PT returns from overseas. Her PT is her women's health expert she refers her patients to. The GP assures me that the PT is highly educated, experienced and most importantly - open to new ideas.

One of the best things I obtained from the visit was "normalising prolapse". Face it, as we age we sag. Our boobs sags, our eyelids sag, eyesight gets worse, bits and pieces don't work so well. So our fannies will sag. How much sagging occurs is variable and dependent on a range of factors.

Like so much of our body, if we do the right thing by it, we will get a better outcome.

I have slowly been increasing the scope and duration of stretches and exercises. I am delighted with the results I am obtaining for my whole body not just my lounging vagina. I did not realise how much I needed to lift my game. Afterall, I lead a reasonably active life so why should I need to "exercise". Surely shovelling and pushing a wheelbarrow around several hours most days is enough.

I have lost 3 kilos and plan on losing another 1-2. While I was not overweight, bit by bit my girth was expanding, my clothes were getting tighter. I figured that if I was carrying extra blab around my belly, then my internal organs had extra weight as well.

Nothing like having a fear of falling fannies to inspire me to lose weight!

alemama

September 22, 2010 - 8:08pm

Oh man I laughed out loud (LOL)
falling fannies and lounging vaginas......
I am so happy for you- I love reading that someone else thinks about it the same way I do :) it's validating.
Keep doing right by your body woman! and your body will do right by you...

and I'll take inspiration anyway it comes.

louiseds

September 24, 2010 - 10:01am

I think you are right, Gardengirl. The challenge is normalising POP, the same way as womankind is trying to normalise being size 14, 16 or bigger, instead of feeling guilty that we are not built like a 13 year old. The reality is that something like 1/3 of British women are size 16 or above. So why pretend that 80% of us can be size 6 or 8? Get real. Yes, many of us are carrying a bit of extra fat but ...

Likewise, if 50% of women have POP, then that is the new normal. Let's not pretend that 80% of us should have pelvic organs stretched tight as a drum. It is just not reality. Gravity, too much sun, the clock and wear and tear and having babies causes our bodies to distend, and stretch. Women are designed to have more than one baby, so there is little point in our innards going back to pre-pregnant tautness, just to have to stretch again in a couple of years.

Sure, some POP is just stretching, but some is residual damage after surgical intervention or tearing during birthing, or perhaps constipation-related.

However, the other normal is that a large percentage pf us Westerners live a lifestyle that closes our chest, hunches our shoulders and weakens our musculature. Reverse those 21st century posture changes and you can function quite well, POPs and all. Many disease symptoms, not just POP symptoms, will disappear with better posture, better fitness and a less processed diet. The standard for good posture is possibly not good enough. There have been a few women who thought they had good posture who have visited the Wholewoman Center, and come away realising how bad their 'good' posture really was. Lengthening out and standing proud does not happen overnight. We can extend the range of movement of our bodies way past what we thought was possible and feel much better for it, after the aches and pains stage is over.

We are obsessively narcissistic about what our bodies look like, and how they 'perform'. And we are just as judgemental about other people. Any variation from what we see of the cover of the magazine makes us compare ourselves with the waif. And guess who always comes away worse off. Not the waif, for sure! We are stained every day with the label of not being good enough. Time to take back all those judgemental attitudes about others and ourselves, and just accept our bodies the way they are, and give thanks that we still have them. Only then can we learn to live in our body as best we can, and look after it so it will still be healthy and whole into old age.

Long live the saggy baggy elephant!

squeak

September 26, 2010 - 5:51am

I love the story 'velveteen rabbit' where it says that you are not Real until you have been loved so much that your fur falls out and your ears go floppy (or wahtever the specifics were, I forget.)

I feel that way about my children: cos I have stretched nipples not just prolapse (and the arrival of my prolapse was dierctly correlated with pregnancy) - if they've loved me into this shape then I'm happy with that. Life has given me many wrinkles and scars that I'm proud of. They're my autobiography, my own body poetry. I don't want to be a sleek little yacht with no barnacles. I want to be a big wooden creaky mothership, with wonderful billowy sails. In fact the few days I've been walking in WW posture I feel like a 'figurehead' shape.

((That said, I am also happy to have as much pop reversal through posture as possible!!))

Only problem now is a husband whom I doubt will share that view of 'real'...

louiseds

September 26, 2010 - 9:54am

Oh Squeak, I know which boat he would like to be on in heavy seas! Surely he is not stupid enough to take on the ocean's fickle nature with a supermodel? Noah knew that too.

I do love the pictures you have painted of both body and boats. I am happy with 'my fur falling out' too. It brings forth such wonderful memories.

granolamom

September 26, 2010 - 7:43pm

that doesn't sound like self-pity to me. you sound pretty strong and sure. and everyone knows that's what real men like ; )
am also loving the boats analogy. going to strut around tonight like a figurehead on a big ole mothership with my wonderful billowy sails. am really enjoying that one.
btw, how many littles do you have?

gardengirl

September 27, 2010 - 4:31am

yeah, great comment, I can't count how many times I have read that book to my granddaughters- read it a few days ago too.

squeak

September 27, 2010 - 3:01pm

just my one 'big boy' of 5 and now my little baby girl, g-mom. (And more paranoid now about getting pregnant again than even in my teen years.)

Oh, L, that comment about the high seas, thank you : ) That's exactly it. These kinds of 'problems' such as pop etc do so much maturing of us as we tackle them, really I think we gain in value if anything. But in this society that does value the supermodels, its hard ...

And I know this ww forum isnt a place to discuss marriages in general but your comment helped me articulate the problem with mine: I'm a high seas kind of woman, while he (seems at present) a bit of a marina kind of guy... sigh. I need to know he's willing to voyage with me before I feel safe to show this new addition to my timbers. On the other hand, telling him might be the only way to find out...

granolamom

September 28, 2010 - 3:30pm

this is a fine place to talk about marriages! I think that its very 'on topic' even if I am prone to off-topic posts myself.

babies and growing families definitely can challenge a marriage, even without POP. I think its very common for spouses to mature at different rates. I hope that your man proves to be sea-worthy, and that this fear/worry you have is nothing more than his reaction to your growing family. one thing to be 'cute couple with a kid' to having a full fledged family of four. we all age, I think as women and mothers we have no choice but to face that fact head on, the men have a bit more wiggle room for denial it seems.
{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}