Periods, POP and PP : (

Submitted by jellybaby83 on November 16, 2011 - 4:07am
Body: 

Hi everyone! So, i thought i'd update and vent

I'm now a little over 11 weeks pp and have hit an all time low (both mentally and physically) : (. I feel so frustrated as i was just coming to terms with my pop and had stared to feel a teeny bit more positive. I have a cystocele and rectocele and wear a tampon for support. Just recently i think my uterus has joined in the decent (guess it felt left out, haha!). Yesterday i had the worst day popwise and spent most of it crying, boohoo! I felt so uncomfortable and bulgy, i ended up crawling into bed at 8.30pm just to get some relief.

Woke up this morning feeling slightly more positive, this only lasted a mere 10 minutes as low and behold - my 1st period since having my baby :( I feel awful today, really crampy and achey and to be honest a little bit nervous about whats to come with pop and period. I HATE sanitary towels so i'm praying tampons will still work in absorbing my flow (sorry tmi).

I feel pop has robbed me of enjoying these precious early weeks with my baby. I hate the way it makes me feel. I'm so angry that i have yet another hurdle to get overcome. Since i was 16 i've suffered from anorexia, depresion and got diagnosed with body dysmorphic disorder. It's been an uphill battle since then and even suffered with depression whilst i was pregnant this time round. As soon as i had my baby i felt like the dark cloud lifted and felt happier than i've felt in years! 3 weeks later i discovered my pop. I guess thats why i'm so angry right now. I know everyone here is in the same boat but it's not fair! All i want is to be happy and surrounded by my family but pop is holding me back.

I pray everyday for this to get better but no matter what i do it only seems to get worse. I walk, eat and sleep posture. I'm trying to perfect firebreathing (nauli is still a mystery!) I don't lift anything heavier than my baby and even have him placed in my arms when i can. Is this my life now? Bulges, pain and not being able to do things for myself, great : (

I'm sorry this is sooooo long and depressing but you guys are the only people that understand.

Love and Hugs x

Surviving60

November 16, 2011 - 8:57am

Jellybaby, everything I have ever read on this site about the timing of post-partum POP, and also periods, points to you being in the middle of probably the worst possible time. I can't advise you from personal experience like many on this forum can (my symptoms didn't start until my kids were in their teens). But it seems like you're getting the double-whammy right now. Prolapse likes to get you just when you think life is getting under control.....we all know that! Take heart and don't lose faith in your body.

louiseds

November 16, 2011 - 7:19am

Hi Jellybaby

Here's a hug for you, for what it's worth over the miles. ((((Jellybaby)))).

You really are at the worst place right now, being 11 weeks pp, and having just got your first period. Oh well, maybe that is why your emotions have been playing tricks on you in the last couple of weeks. Hopefully the cloud will lift a bit now your period is here, in spite of the first one always seeming to be worse than normal. Hopefully your menstrual cycle will stabilise quickly and get into a manageable pattern.

There is really nothing more that you can do right now, except be very patient, and all the valuable things you are already doing. Another thing you could do is to reread some of the pregnancy forum posts and read the stories of women just like yourself who got to three months postpartum and thought the8ir POPs would ever be any better. Lo and behold the improvements do finally start, improving, and that improvement should start soon for you.

I am sure than in a year's time you will not believe how much better you are. Try and visualise yourself looking back at yourself now, and wondering how you could ever not have faith in your body to recover from the pregnancy, just like every other woman does. Just have faith. Your body was designed to have a nine month pregnancy, and birth a baby and take two years to revert back again. It is truly miraculous what your body has done. It will get better.

Louise

jellybaby83

November 17, 2011 - 4:52pm

Thank you ladies for your kind and supportive words : ). I'm amazed at the level of support and knowledge you guys have for each other! Without this site I would be a blubbering mess right now. I have hope that I can improve and maybe one day I can be the one supporting newbies to pop.

Love and Hugs : )

granolamom

November 17, 2011 - 7:25pm

it gets better, really it does

and fwiw, I completely agree with the others, this is most likely rock-bottom. life will be good again.

{{{{{hugs}}}}}