Baby is here!

Congratulations Mindful, what a clever mum you are. Happy Birthday little Seth. What proud sisters you must have. And dad has a boy.

Don't know about your tear, my first tear healed without, but then the second one along the old one, they automatically put in stitches. Don't believe it was discussed.

I'm sure Alemama will be on soon if she can.

Cheers Fab

Congratulations Mumma! You've done a fantastic job!

Yes, tears can heal by themselves, and in many cases, they heal a lot better than with stitches. But you MUST keep your legs together. Stay in bed for a couple of weeks. Definitely until your milk comes in - only get up for the bathroom. Everything else is just common sense - No walking up stairs or anything for a couple of weeks etc. Here are a bunch of midwives talking about stitching and not stitching http://www.gentlebirth.org/archives/suturing.html#Whether

According to the brilliant Midwife thinking blog "In relation to 2nd degree tears (the most common) the need to suture is debatable if the tear aligns well and is not bleeding... In my own experience as a midwife I have found that un-sutured perineums heal very quickly and with far less pain than sutured perineums. Now-a-days my suturing skills are mostly utilised in teaching suturing... There is very little midwives can do to protect women’s perineums so we need to stop taking the credit and the blame for perineal outcome. Instead we need encourage women to trust that their body has an innate ability to birth their baby; that perineal tearing is a normal part of birth; and that the body will heal itself. " http://midwifethinking.com/2010/08/07/perineal-protectors/

I was bummed after my second bub's birth when I tore too. It was such an amazing accidental unassisted birth though, and I totally followed all my instincts, so was surprised when I tore - but he did have a big head, and I felt like I had been stitched up too tight after DS1's birth anyway. DD was a water birth at home, and my midwife said I pushed perfectly - ie, that I didn't do anything, my body did the job - but I still tore (1st deg). I think that when a woman births 'naturally' (ie, without direction & interferrence), and tears, well, that's natural too. Your body did what it needed to do. And it will do what it has to do to heal.

Now take it easy & enjoy your baby! :)

Congratulations to you Dear Mindful and to your family! It sounds like you did ever so beautifully. I had a tear (many years ago). All was fine and everything healed naturally, no stitches, just a bit of time. Hopefully you will have a little help and can rest and enjoy these precious days. My very best to you!

Congratulations, Mindful, on a blessed birth.

Please know there is an entire generation - maybe two or three - who are living well in WW posture after full-on episiotomies and severe tears.

I believe your midwife is well educated!! Michel Odent, the famous OB-turned-midwife..most aware birth attendant on the planet - recommends keeping legs together after a tear - he calls the healing process something like citricalization (sorry...have had a long night, cannot think of the right word, but I bet Alemama knows) .

No matter what..there are generations of us living with little or no perineum left (the anal sphincter is *everything* in the final analysis) after multiple episiotomies. All we have is this work! No matter how you want to name exercises that move the organs *forward*, and away from the pelvic outlet at the *back* of the body, this is the response to prolapse. Call it Pilates, call it yoga...it doesn't matter as long as you are relaxing your lower belly so that intraabdominal pressure can move your organs forward. The problem is, most women are not aware of the concept that the organs are carried forward, while the outlet is at the back of the body. It is a paradigm shift thats time has come.

Trust in your body to heal without damaging stitches. You will recover, but remember that the pelvic organ support system in a postural system - they are one and the same.

Christine

Congrats! I'll bet you're in seventh heaven now, I know I would be. Please update us on yow your tear heals. I've had three episiotomies and am worried I'll have to tear next time, even if I birth without any management from others. Good luck toyou!

Ps- thanks for the links, MissKaly- such amazing info. I'll bet the writer of midwifethinking would be very open to the WW model.

Hey Mindful, congratulations. So happy for you. No doubt this birth night will not be the last time this baby keeps you up all night in the next 25 years! ;-)

I am sure that your body will be fine in time. Now, enjoy your babymoon, and keep your legs together, just like Mummy told you to, but for different reasons!

Louise

How is your perineum looking now? I know I'm late getting to this, but you birth sounds glorious! Congratulations on your sweet baby Seth.
I know you are disappointed about the tearing, but we are made to tear if need be. I know so well that feeling of not wanting to rush it and wanting to hold back and allow the skin to stretch and then getting into the moment and just going with it!
For baby #5 I had an elaborate plan to have dh report to me the condition of my perineum (pink is good, if it starts whiting out you know it's going to tear) and then we planned for him to support the area if it needed support. Instead what happened was I reached down and supported and sort of squeezed it together and made a web of support with my hand as the head was birthing (if you are planning to birth again someday and want to know exactly what position and how I did it I can describe it to you). He did report to me about the whiting out though, I just didn't want his hands on me at the time.
If you have not already, make yourself a nice tea for your perineum- be sure to use comfry it's great.
I made a patch with sea weed for my big tear, that really seemed to hold things together nicely.
But the trick (sadly) is to keep the area from opening up. I had a terrible mishap with a pad sticking to some pubic hair and pulled the skin apart. So watch for that happening.
I hope you are feeling amazing and that your baby is drinking his milk and sleeping some for you.
Keep me updated about your tear healing.

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congratulations mindful! and welcome to the world Baby Seth!
my youngest pushed her way out in a similar way, I had planned another 'no push' birth but that proved impossible. so you allowed your body to do what it needed to do and that was no small baby either. well done!
I hope your tear is healing well. remember that stitches are not without consequence either. I wish someone had told me to keep my legs together when I tore after my first baby. they just left it unstitched and sent me on my way. never healed properly and meh, here I am four more babies later, doing well. I think you will be ok.
take good care of yourself and enjoy that growing family of yours
mmmm I love babies : )

:-)