Devastated

Hey there. I am also a nurse, have two small children, and a cystocele that, after nearly four years of making whole woman posture *my* posture, does not interfere with my life one iota. I have been in that dark place where you find yourself now, and it sucks. Now, deep breath, chin up, because it gets soooo much better! First, realize that it takes about 2 years to recover from pregnancy/childbirth. At 7 weeks pp, you have not realized even one tenth of one percent of the healing and reversion your body will do -- add whole woman and you will see even more. Where to start? Read the FAQs, do the self-exam, see the online video clips, and *invest in yourself* with the First Aid for Prolapse or Second Wheel DVD. Track my posts and those of other pp moms who have been on the forums. And for goodness sake, stop checking and get out of bed! Look at your baby, not your crotch. Get standing, do gentle walks in WW posture and get your bones in a place that actually supports your organs. Because guess what? Your body has the amazing capability of keeping all of it's parts exactly where they should be! In a month or two, learn Nauli and leave fear of prolapse in the dust. You can do this. You are going to be just fine. More than fine. Be gentle with yourself and see that some of your current feelings may stem from those wonky pp hormones. As nurses, we see a lot of things that can devastate a person. In my humble opinion, with some time, some TLC, some work, prolapse can score a "meh" on the continuum that is devastation. Best wishes -- I'm rooting for you!

I am happy for you that you found this site. I second all that bad-mirror has said! You will be fine, and with your young age (I am post meno) you have the potential of really getting into a good place. Order the bundle (book, DVDs, baton)....and go nice and slow. You are healing now and once you set this posture into place, you will feel better in no time. Yes, go on that trip. You do not need to keep checking yourself in a mirror, or even check at all. The thing you need to do, is adopt a position that will support you. Lift your chest and soften all those belly muscles (no, you may not any longer pull in the abs or tuck the tailbone----that is step one. Allow your lumbar curve to take it's shape. Go into the FAQs here and post back all of your questions. Maybe you can actually get the basic posture before your trip and then along with travels and time with family, you will be working on bringing your body to a better place. Congratulations on your little boy! We all know that stress and panic and anxiety. We also now know (and you will soon) that it will be okay. My very best wishes to you!

Welcome - congratulations on your lovely baby. I can't add too much to the advice given above except to say that I spent a lot of time resting after my babies' births & also went through a kind of grieving process when I needed to find an alternative lifestyle to support prolapse. You are doing both at once so don't be hard on yourself. (((hugs))) to you - you are not alone in this journey - Do what bad_mirror & Ms Nightingale have said & let us know how you are going. I have not looked back since finding this wonderful community.
Best wishes
Aussie Soul Sis

I think we all go through grieving. It's ok :) It will likely get better, be patient. You still have a lot of postpartum healing to do, and when your period returns your hormones will help a little too. I have three types of stage 2 to 3 prolapse and some days it bothers me but that's usually when I've been neglecting the posture and carrying stress in my tummy muscles. When I focus on maintaining the posture things are better. You're in the right place to get help! These women have helped me a great deal, more than the doctor or midwife etc. I didn't think it could get better, then one day when it was unbearable I felt a shift and a huge instant improvement. So it's possible :)

Hi Anxious,

Congratulations on the birth of your son! I am also around 7 weeks pp, with my second child. And it's certainly this week that my prolapse is bugging me the most so far. I think tiredness contributes to a postpartum prolapse feeling worse.

What helps me is the knowledge gained from this site and the posture which I've worked with for a year or so. It does make things better but after a baby it's not instant. I'm finding that lying down to breastfeed, or just lying down whenever baby is sleeping, helps take the pressure/bulging feeling away, and often when I get up again it feels better.

I have my postpartum checkup with my GP this week - I am very intrigued to find out how things have changed for me after this pregnancy. I was pretty much symptom-free just before I became pregnant, and I think I will be again at some point in the future. But it ain't a great feeling now, I agree.

Hi anxious,
Congratulations on the birth of your beautiful baby boy and on being a new mother! You're expereincing several major life events and changes simultaneously - and you're recovering from giving birth, coping with roller-coaster hormonal changes and looking after a baby, amongst other things... It's no wonder so many women have pp blues. But we do - and thankfully it passes... Everything changes. If nothing else is certain, that is!

Welcome to the Whole Woman community. Absolutely every single one of us has/has had prolapse - and many, if not most - if not all? - of us have been really, really down about having prolapse symptoms and experiences at some point or another, so you're not alone - and you have our love and support.

Please bear in mind the pelvic organs are realtively mobile, so symptoms can vary from hur to hour, day to day, week by week.... So a diagnosis is of relative value. My feeling is it might be better to focus on how to improve things than to wonder how bad things can get. I.e. it;s good to know what the problem is and have some idea of how symptomatic you are at times, but not helpful to focus on the problem all of the time. (Understandable though that is).

There's a definate link between stress and prolapse - and conversely happiness and prolapse. Stress doesn't help - relaxation does help. Soooo - have a go at thinking about what makes you happy? Try some happy baby steps - hot bath with candles, favourite dish/drink/movie, walk in the park on blistery blustery/sunny shiny day, special look or cuddle with baby, a good laugh...

I know when I've felt down focusing on happiness can feel like one of the hardest things. It's so easy to feel so self-absorbed when we're down. However - truth is, looking after ourselves is as important as looking after others. Sometimes looking after ourselves means looking outwards as well as looking inwards. Like anything and everything else, happiness is something we have to practice. Starting with small steps and then gradually getting into our stride... 1st things 1st: Be good and kind to yourself - and give yourself at least one present of a bit of happiness each day...

Thankfully - you've come to the right place. There are literally masses of help and support here - with step by step details of what to do to reduce your symptoms. Basically there are things you can do to help: WW posture, exercise, diet, pooing, peeing... you name it - we've got an answer! Check out this wonderful resources on this website, FAQ's tool bars, search box for previous answers on the forum, 'Saving the WW'book, exercise dvd's.. (the introductory product package may be a good intro..) If you've still got questions, there's the forum, Christine and WW teachers....

It's ok - help is at hand. The resources for recovery are here...

With love, xwholewomanuk

PS There's a great website re accessing and enhancing happiness, with a free weekly newsletter for this specific purpose, based on Budhist teachings and the latest neuropsychological findings: google in Rick Hanson for further details. (I've no other connection than a great fan of ths website!)

As far as I can tell on the forum, most of us have significantly benefited from the WW approach and our symptoms (physical and psychological) have reduced and in some cases gone away. In any event, the WW way appears to be a very effective way of preventing, managing and treating every kind of pops.

Dear Anxious,

I am 53 years old and after the birth of my son 23 years ago, (two hours of pushing on my back, forceps and suction and third degree tears front and back), I was told that I had a definite prolapse. I had another three children after this and each time pp my doctor told me it was getting worse. Nineteen years ago after the birth of my third child I was going to have a bladder repair, however after discussion with my GP who told me of the possible after effects of ongoing bladder problems, I decided to let it go a while longer and put up with it.

My prolapse did improve over time and it only bothered me when I got my period for a couple of days either side. Apart from that it was not bad enough to cause any issues, even though every smear the doctor told me how bad it was. In fact it is only in the past four months since having my last period in June, that things appear to have "fallen down". I too have been upset and depressed, being too scared to even go to the gym or take the dogs for a walk for fear of losing the lot on the road. I was thinking that I would have to go and have it all taken out and/or repaired. In fact last week I obtained a referral from my GP to a specialist so that I can have surgery organised asap.

Then, yesterday I came across this site, and wow! I feel so much more hope now and don't even want to make that appointment with the specialist. I now feel that surgery will be absolutely the last resort.

So, Anxious, hang in there and enjoy your new baby. Your prolapse will recover and you are so lucky you have discovered Whole Woman now and not later like myself. You can practice the correct posture and use the resources of WW to assist you in the management of your prolapse so that it will not rule your life. Instead you will rule it!

xx

Wow..thank you for sharing your story. I am so happy that you found this site. I can't believe you survived all those 23 years on your own without a place of guidance like this. I just wanted to welcome you, wish you best wishes and tell you that in only six months or so of WW practice, I have much improvement. As you browse around here and take hold of it all, you will have a lovely journey ahead with much hope.

Thanks Michaelina for your inspiring post. Hope we will see you back here often as questions and issues arise, or if you just need some encouragement. There is no way you should ever need surgery, even as a "last resort". Even some who have already had work done are successfully managing with WW in an effort to avoid further damage. I have been here going on 2-1/2 years and can't imagine life any other way. - Surviving

Hi, ladies! It's been awhile. Not sure of the particulars of where to post, so I searched "urethras" and thought this was as good a place as any. First off, don't despair, Anxious! I have the urethral bulge going on and am not sure how long I have had it. I am 53 and post-menopausal and went through some definite discomfort in that area in the last several months which has eased quite a bit. Part of the reason is my stress level, which lessened when I found some information on the internet which matched my urethral situation exactly. So you are not alone! The connection between anxiety and physical symptoms is astounding, at least for me.

I wanted to post, however, that I had my follow-up exam today with my gynecologist. I came armed with questions, even sat with him before my exam spilling out all my queries. Prolapsed uterus which he had already told me about, position of my cervix when seated, convinced my bladder is prolapsed, etc., etc. He was most communicative and reassuring and then when he examined me (again lying down but at least I had drunk a big glass of water before my appointment) ... he STILL doesn't think my bladder has dropped! What's up with that?!?

I explained that when my bladder is full and I am seated on the toilet, I cannot find my cervix (I feel like there is a big cushy pillow inside my vagina). Then, after I have urinated, much of that cushiness has disappeared and I can feel my cervix just inside my vaginal opening (maybe an inch in, if that much). I said, "Is that normal?" And he said, "No, that's not normal." But he just attributes all of that to my prolapsed uterus, I guess. I don't see how that isn't my bladder I am feeling, but what the hell. He really did spend quite a bit of time "down there" which I am thankful for. And I feel relieved that at least what I am convinced I have is obviously not as bad as it could be. That being said, I am bewildered about the whole thing ...

I am definitely grateful for all the ladies and the wealth of information on this site, tho. Truly helpful!

Seachele

Hi Seachele

Well, I think you know more about your pelvic organs than your doctor does. Remember that doctors are basically trained using a supine model of anatomy, which would indicate (if you look at some illustrations) that unless your bladder is prolapsed, it would be the urethra that you can feel. However, he says that your bladder is not prolapsed, so it can't be your bladder. This is a nonsense of the type that Alice would have come across through the looking glass. What you feel while sitting upright on the toilet is most probably your bladder, especially if it is smaller after you have emptied it.

Assessment of prolapse is not an accurate business. I can easily trick a doctor by not bearing down very hard, because I know it will put my pelvic organs out of position and cause me grief afterwards. I know I have prolapses so I am not interested in a doctor telling me about them because 'that's what doctors are supposed to do when they find a prolapse'.

Just because a doctor says something doesn't make it correct. On the other hand many things that doctors say are correct. The trick is to discern which is which. There are two ways to do this. The first is to seek other medical opinions. The second is to learn about your own body, and get to know how it behaves, and what is where.

By the way, there are instructions in Saving the Whole Woman for doing a self-exam, and finding out for yourself how to assess yourself. If you do it yourself you are making your own benchmark for comparison down the road. Should you decide to have surgical repairs the doctor of course will take no notice of your own assessment. They have to do their own.

Louise

Thank you for your reply. Yes! I think I do know more about my pelvic organs than my doctor does -- thanks to this website! It is amazing to me that a doctor would say everything is peachy keen when a patient's specific question is "What is going on with my bladder?" I have done the self-exam, and I felt EXACTLY what Christine describes as a prolapsed bladder. I also told him that my stress incontinence had stopped completely, which I attributed to the bladder prolapse (as explained by you!), and that didn't seem to phase him, either. I am considering switching doctors -- there are a couple of female specialists in my area -- so that is a definite possibility down the road. I will keep my options open and will continue to stay in tune with my own body. Thanks again for your kindness and concern!

Seachele