5mths postpartum and rectocele

Body: 

Hi,

I'm 34 and a first time mum. I'm desperate for some help. My story goes like this :

At 3 weeks of postpartum, I was squating to clean my bottom (sorry TMI) and suddenly I felt a drop and I felt sore between my legs whenever I stand/walk. At 6 weeks check-up, I told my obs/gynae that I felt sore and have lots of yellowish discharge but she told me is because of my bad tear that probably take a little longer to recover and the discharge is due to hormonal change. She said everything is ok. So, I took her word and waiting for things to improve. I even discussed the soreness and yellow discharge to my family doc and she did a pap test for me at 2mths postpartum and was also told that it was ok. She advised me to do kegel and also recommended me to do a new pelvic floor exercise by Dr. Stacy Irvine, which uses an exercise ball in between legs. I did the exercise on the 4+mths of postpartum for 15mins. After doing the exercise, I found myself bleeding and decided to brave myself to look with a mirror . I was terrified that I found some tissue (as big as a kidney bean)protuding at the end of the vaginal and it was in dark red. I cried and not knowing what happened and mentioned again to my family doc which she did another checked for me. During the check, the size has reduced. Unfortunately, she can't confirm what that is as she can only tell that it is not from the cervix but probably from the bottom which require further check from the gynae. So, I'm currently referred back to my gynae and will have it check in 1 week time. I'm really scared and lost as I'm not sure what is going to happen to me as I'm a first time mum and putting lots of hope to have a happy family life. On the positive side, the discharge and soreness between my legs has reduced but the tissues still exist.

I'm so scared that this could be rectocele and is this going to be there forever? I have sleepless nights and feeling really depressed all the time. I know I shouldn't as this will affect me and my baby but I'm so lost and upset. Can someone please tell me whether is this rectocele prolapse?

FYI, I had an epidurial vaginal birth with episiotomy and the obs/gynae that delivered my baby said that I'm really petite and the opening is small (sorry TMI again). So, I think she did an episiotomy.

I would really appreciate if someone could respond to my query and give me some advise while waiting for my next check-up and also the WW DVD +Book that I've ordered.

Thanks!

Welcome to this site. You are quite young and still recovering from the birth. Do not despair. If you can order the book and DVDs from this site, that will help to educate you and to put you on the right path. Have you explored this site enough to know what we are working on with WW posture? No matter what your age, or your prolapse, this posture is what will get you on the road to recovery. Most of us have discovered through experience that kegels are not the way to go. You will find a lot of info on that here in the forum and in the posts in library and resources. I don't know what exercises with the ball between the legs, but it sounds like it is not what you want to do. Being only 5 months pp, your starting place is the posture. If you can work on that all the time you are up that would be best. When you tire, rest with baby or rest in knees and elbows position which was particularly good for me. Best wishes to you and keep posting comments and questions!

Hi Lost - Nightingale is right - you are still healing. Lay off the kegels and the exercise ball, relax and start learning about the posture. Restoring your body to this alignment while you are still PP can be such a great advantage. Keep the belly relaxed, chest pulled up, shoulders down but not back. It might feel strange if you have been sucking in your abs and tucking your butt the way many of us have. It might not feel so strange if your body is still remembering how it felt to have all those organs held forward in pregnancy. Bottom line, when you restore lumbar curvature and this posture becomes your own, you'll feel like a new person. Your hips and spine will thank you. Prolapse can be stabilized and even somewhat reversed, definitely to the point where you no longer live in fear of worsening. I've been doing this 2-1/2 years. I won't say I never feel any symptoms, because I often do. But I have zero fear or stress associated with prolapse, and no limitations on anything. This is the only way to go. - Surviving

PS, keep something behind your lower back when driving. It's one of the things I ignored for the first year....It's best to protect your lumbar curvature as much as possible when upright.

Other aspects of “Saving the Wholewoman” apart from posture (which as Nightingale and Surviving both say is essential) is diet and elimination. From your description it does sound like rectocele, and if that is what your specialist determines then rest assure that it is liveable with a bit of dedication.

The concern with diet is to minimise foods which you believe may make you constipated or for a hard, difficult to pass stool or a soft difficult to pass stool, or gas provoking. In this way you try to make sure that the rectum is stretched and distended as little as possible, or conversely, to include foods which will make passing stools easier.

The concern with elimination is to ensure that you do not strain on the toilet, and in the case of ladies with prolapsed bladder that they do not inadvertently retain stale urine with incomplete elimination.

You can approach the issue from all these angles, and yes forget the exercise for a while and concentrate on Christine’s. Glad you found us.

Best wishes, Fab

Hi all,

Thank you for all the encouraging words.

Yes, I've ordered the book +DVD and waiting for it to arrive.

I'm still feeling miserable and always blame myself for not taking my in law advise during my 1st mth postpartum. I was advised not to do any heavy lifting and squat during that time but I was too stubborn to listen. I should have taken my mum in law advise and I'm deeply regret.

I've read so many post on the site and after reading the post, it make me feel worse, I get upset easily and cry all the time because I can't perform like a normal mum and wife where I constantly have to restrict myself from doing things and relying on my poor hubby. But,I really thank god for giving me such a supportive and caring husband. Often, I felt very sad seeing how he has to do the housework and heavy lifting. I felt myself so useless!!!!! Today, I even thought of ending my life but i didn't.....

I love travelling a lot and this is what we have been doing before we have our baby and I thought I could do this together with my baby but it seems that it is impossible because I'm so afraid that if I walk for long, the POP may get worse. I'm so afraid that I have to restrict myself from going to the malls for shopping, etc. Each time at the mall when I see mum enjoying with their LO without any problem, I felt so sad and think am I the only one who is suffering from this???

BTW, I'm in Canada and have just recently moved to this beautiful country with lots of hope doing lots of travelling but now it seems that my dreams have shattered. If anyone in Canada, I would really love to hear from you and have your support.

Besides, I've read some post mentioning about abs/stomach vacuum. Can someone pls advise how should I do this?

Thanks!

best thing you can do for prolapse is to take walks in WWposture, the movement of your legs and the holding of your body in correct posture is stretching and pushing your body back into its correct positioning.

Yes, you have to get over your regret at not taking mum-in-law's advice, how unfortunate that her advice turned out to be correct and your eagerness for life led you astray. You are here now and no looking back here in this instance because it won't undo, but I am sure that mum-in-law is as upset as you about it and will not really be blaming you and accept it as fate's hand. Don't worry about your husband, he sounds very nice and he will do for you what he can.

Now you too are doing what you can for yourself with posture, understanding and exercises. You will be able to resume doing more of the things that you have temporarily been forced to forgo. Chinese mothers do not shop or lift things apart from baby for a good twelve months, so some cultures make a tradition of these things where our western culture does not. We must see a lesson here.

Just be careful that your feeling of helplessness in not being able to do things is not becoming postpartum depression. Where would your dear husband and baby be with out you? You are the centre of their universe so out there girl, fetch the pram and take your beautiful hubby and baby for a nice walk at the mall. Just leave early if you tire or feel uncomfortable. Then try again in the next few days.

The abs/vacuum you are talking about is probably firebreathing and it is explained in Christine's book. In the meanwhile concentrate on posture and get it right and make it the natural way you hold yourself.
Then when the book and DVD arrive tuck in swallow them down and you are prepared and equipped to face your future.

best wishes, Fab

It is great that you have ordered the book and DVD. It is also great that you have such a wonderful husband. I really want you to know that you can keep those dreams of yours. You will be able to travel and do the wonderful things that you have been dreaming of. This time now is only temporary as you will learn how to make posture your own, you will learn to bend at your hips and honor the lumbar curve and then in time, you might even forget that you have this issue. That is what has happened for me and for so many of us. We thought our lives were over and look !! here we are....sharing with you, the joy and the improvements we have made. Do try to relax and find a way to find hope. If you can face this now with a sense of hope and trust, it will help you. Keep posting. And Yes, there are many women in Canada who are on this forum. I do not know which ones but I know because we were going to arrange a retreat and I was told there were many Canadians. Maybe some will come on here to respond to you. In the mean time, pull yourself into posture, find something positive to think of, and trust that in time, you too will be posting good news here. Love and Best Wishes! Oh..the ab/vacuum will be described in the book and dvd, but it is essentially fire-breathing and nauli. This has helped many women. I do not do it confidently so I will let someone else describe it, but you can put it into the search box and many posts will come up.

Hi Lost – I can’t imagine what posts you are reading that make you think you can’t do housework, travel, lift, walk, or go shopping!! Whole Woman teaches you how to carry yourself so that you can do all of these things in a prolapse-friendly way. I know you’re in a panic now; we have all been there. But prolapse is basically a wake-up call to correct your posture and learn how to carry your body for best pelvic organ support. Once you have mastered posture and have a grasp of the underlying principles of Christine’s teachings, you can do anything.

You are referring to fire-breathing, which is covered in the book and DVD’s.

Take a deep breath, stop crying, enjoy your wonderful family. You will learn to love and appreciate your body again. - Surviving

Hello, I too just joined this forum and have been doing the WW posture now since finding this sight and my POP. I have noticed that things are not as bulgy as when they first appeared but have been advised to not do the WW exercises until after I have my baby, so I have just been walking and sitting in posture and have noticed a difference.

My husband took me to see Carol the WW practitioner in Pennsylvania this week. I was getting a very sore upper back from not keeping my shoulders down, and she really helped me to learn the posture better and also showed me fire breathing and nauli for after the baby. The trip was 9 hours one way, and I was no worse POP wise, but had a sore back from the shoulder issue on the way down, not the way home. Posture alone has helped me so far, so I am sure that the exercises must at least double the effort in recovery or reversal.

Even though it is hard to see through the tears, which I had as well, try to see the positive! I am certain that there must be oodles of young moms, even younger than ourselves walking through the mall with the same issues as we have, that are either out of touch with their bodies, or chalk it up to pregnancy or a difficult delivery, and in time the symptoms will just go away as the head further down the pp road. Unfortunately because they have ignored the symptoms now they will not have had the opportunity to start WW posture and so when menopause comes, which it will for every single one of them, some may experience the issue again, and being past childbearing age, sadly most will probably agree to major surgery! We are young, we are finding out now how to better our bodies from this issue, and we will control it. You can train your body to hold those organs properly and hope in time they stay where they are intended to be.

I hope soon your tears dry up, and you take your husband for a nice walk with your new little one, walking tall in WW posture! You will feel good about yourself, and your body again! Trust that it can change, you just need to show it how to change in the best possible way!

Hi All,

Thanks again for all support.

After all the tears, I have decided to stay strong and work towards recovery. My husband came home yesterday seeing me in tears. He said that 'We will work towards it' and also he will try to do some adjustment for me ie.drop me off at the entrance of the mall instead of me walking from the parking etc. My tears was splashing out like a garden sprinkler!

Today, we went out for few hours. When I return, I noticed that there are more discharge compared to the past few days. Is this normal? Does anyone encounter discharge for their prolapse? Will the discharge go away?

Besides, I have lower back pain after practising the WW walking posture. I'm not sure whether I did it the right way but is this usual?

Also, I wish to know when I lie down to rest, should I lie flat with my legs straight or should I bend with my kness at 45 degrees?

What are the things that will worsen prolapse and what to avoid?

When sitting to feed my baby, what posture should I practise?

I just recalled that my previous menstruation was very heavy that I need to change every 2hrs for 2 days (sorry TMI) and it got back to normal on the 3rd/4th day. Is this something to worry?

Any supplements that can help prolapse?

Is rectocele more severe and complicated than others POP?

Sorry for too many questions.

Thanks!

HI Lost

It is good to see that you have decided to take on the challenge of not letting this get to you, and working with your husband's cooperation to get on top of it.

You are still in an adjustment period. It will get better, as you learn new tricks, and as the posture becomes more natural. Lower back pain may be because you are trying to lift your tailbone. If you just lift your chest, as if there is a string pulling straight up from the bottom of your breastbone the main effect is to bring the part of your spine where your bra fastens at the back, forward slightly. This gives you a laarger radius lumbar curve. Relaxing your belly will allow your pelvis to drop forward by itself, and your tailbone will naturally lift a little.

It is hard to tell what is happening with vaginal discharge. It could be that your body is gearing up to return to oestrus, so your vagina is wetter. I have heard of increased discharge with prolapse but it hasn't been my experiences. However, I was perimenopausal when I decided that my prolapse needed attention, so I wasn't getting a lot of discharge anyway. The other possibility is that your vaginal walls are more in contact with your vulva, so your introitus is wider, and the discharge is more spread out on your knickers.

When you lie down to rest it really doesn't matter how you lie. Just get comfy and enjoy it. Nothing dreadful is going to happen if you lie the wrong way. It is preferable to lie down flat, with just your head on a cushion, than it is to slump on a sofa, semi upright, with no lumbar curve.

If you don't feel strong enough to sit upright while feeding you can lie down to feed with baby beside you. You could also try putting a pillow on your knee, and put baby on the pillow, so you don't have to slouch over. A pillow in the small of your back will help to keep your lumbar curve in place.

What to avoid?

Straining on the toilet!!
Sitting in a C shape.
Bending from the waist when lifting loads.
Doing exercises that put you into a C shape
Thinking you can do all your jobs without help.
Not accepting help
Not drinking enough water during the day, especially while lactating.
Eating too much meat and not enough veges.
Getting constipated.

Re menstruation, I am not clear what you are worried about. Are you worried about the first two days being heavy?

Supplements? No, not really. It is posture and the way we use our bodies under load that will improve our symptoms. Things we eat need to be balanced and to have enough of the right type of fibre and water, so we don't get constipated.

There is no need to feel guilty about your 'poor husband' having to do all the housework for now, or dropping you off near the shops. He is big and strong, and he loves you. That is why he is doing it. You would do the same for him if he was injured. It is all part of being a good team. You are lucky, and made a good choice in marrying him! :-)

I wouldn't say that rectocele is more complicated than the others. All the pelvic organs are tethered loosely to each other to allow for one being distended. They all move together. Moving your bladder and uterus forwards will rotate your rectum up and forwards too, so it won't be trying to squash into the bottom of your pelvic cavity, and into your vaginal space. Keeping your food moving through your intestines is really the secret to keeping rectocele at bay.

Louise

Heavy periods have always been a normal thing for me. When I was between bearing children the heavy days would last at least the first 3 days, and I would have 7 day periods all together.
Now in perimenopause I have usually 1 gushing blood clotty day and about a 4 day period.
I asked the doctors several times about heavy periods and they were not concerned at all.
When I did get tested for hormones and such last year, the only thing they said is that I was a little anemic and that I should take iron. Well, I didn't take an iron supplement, because it is constipating; but, I do try to eat more iron rich foods.
Don't worry Lost, we have all started where you are. I haven't done this that long and am seeing improvements. You just really have to listen to the advice of these really knowledgable ladies and do the work.
Wishing you the best.

I'm with you, Aging. My periods were exactly the same when I was younger. However, in perimenopause they were heavier for longer, but stopped more suddenly, lasting only 5 days. The flooding days were a bit trying, but I managed with really wide pads with wings. I could always feel a flood happening, and would visit the toilet and change the napkin. Night times were heavier for me during menopause, until my uterus flipped from retroverted to anteverted (yay!). Then the nights became lighter.

Finally, my cycles stretched out more and more, and the bleeding never seemed to be much trouble for the last couple of years. Finally, I just got a couple of days of light spotting, several months apart, before the obligatory 12 month wait, and I was officially at menopause.

Re iron, you can get one type of iron supplement which does not cause constipation. Can't remember what it is called. I think iron rich foods are a must.

Hmm, there's a thought. Red meat is very rich in iron. I wonder if that is why it can cause constipation?

I did have some of those really flooding days last year. I would stand in the shower and blood and clots would just roll down my legs. I was thinking I was going to bleed to death, but I didn't! I don't know if it is because I have been doing whole woman or if I am getting closer to menopause, but my periods aren't as bad or as long as they used to be. The crazy feeling has been lesser too, so maybe?
I am trying to stay away from meat, myself. It is great that you can find iron in other sources.

Agnesdei-Thank you for your kind words. At least I know I'm not alone. BTW, how do you sit with the correct posture? Can you pls advise?

MsNightingale- Would really appreciate if you could let me know the retreat once it's organised.

Louiseds-When I tried to relax my lower belly while walking in WWposture, I tend to feel that things are not well supported and I'm worried that it may drop further. Should I hold on my pelvis (like doing Kegel) while walking with a relax belly? I'm not sure whether I've practise the posture correctly.

Hi Lost – there is nothing floppy or unsupported about WW posture. If you find yourself feeling that way, try pulling your chest up some more. It is a very strong and graceful shape for the body. Keep your shoulders down, but not back.

Do not do a kegel while walking. Christine has written much about how kegels aggravate prolapse, because they pull the organs farther away from their natural positions.

Sitting posture is basically the same as standing. Keep belly relaxed and chest pulled up. Sit using the strength of your spine – don’t collapse the spine or let it round, as you would if you were leaning back in a soft couch. You want to develop a good lower lumbar curvature, and then protect it as much as possible. Example – when you drive, stuff something into the small of your back. - Surviving

I read through your notes and am touched by your fear and guilt, so I want to add a little hope to the mix. Once you have found this site, you're on your way. I am so grateful for Christine and the Whole Woman program.

I was amazed that my babies (so long ago now) were so resilient. It has taken me much longer to have that hope for myself, but I'll say over and over again how well we are made - both mind and body. And hope means expectation of results, not wishful thinking. I'm new on this site too and am finding here encouragement to apply myself to the program with a good expectation.

I just realized I posted this in response to another young woman's notes and it seems wildly inappropriate. I'll try to be more careful.

Nothing to be sorry about! Post wherever you like! Comments always welcome and yours is totally appropriate to the thread. We're here to support each other - Surviving

I, too, am anemic and had trouble taking regular iron. I take the brand SlowFe iron now and do very well on it. It does not bother my stomach or constipate me at all. I know everyone is different, though.

Thank you, jh. I will check into that.

Hi Lost

Yes, casting my mind back, it was weird at first. You think "How can this be right?" And yet it wasn't worse. It just felt floppy.

You might give some thought to getting your breathing right first. Breathe with your diaphragm, inhaling and letting your belly expand, and allowing your belly to come in again when you exhale. A good big inhalation will expand your belly, lift your chest, tilt your pelvis forwards, lift your tailbone, and move your upper back and shoulders backwards. Your pelvic organs will move forwards as long as your belly is relaxed. If you want to clench your pelvic floor then go ahead if you have to, but remember that you are concentrating on your breathing, not your pelvic floor.

You might want to get your breathing right lying down first, so you don't have to worry about your pelvic floor at all. Sitting would be the next stage. Thoroughly relax. Put your hands on your belly and make your hands rise and fall with your breath, with no involvement of shoulders or chest.

Once you get yourself breathing with your diaphragm, and your belly coming in and out, your pelvic floor will probably feel less vulnerable.

This may take several weeks. It is a brain thing as much as a body thing.

Louise

Thanks louiseds!

Thought of updating my situation here. I went to see my gynae 2 weeks ago at the outpatient and was confirmed that I do not have rectocele but granulation tissues. It was such a big relief when she confirmed that. My gynae removed the granulation tissues for me on the same day when I see her and I felt sore for a few days. Eventhough she has confirmed that I do not have prolapse but I still feel sore/ache whenever I walk/stand for long. I noticed this when I went to the mall last weekend and felt ache between my legs. I'm not sure why I would still feel sore if I do not have POP. My husband said that I actually worried too much but I just can't get over it. The discharge has gone and nothing protudes out but why am I still feeling not the same as before delivery? Could it be the wound from my episiotomy and the recent granulation tissues removal that causes me the ache? Any advise pls.

BTW, I'm still waiting for my book and DVD which is taking too long. It's so frustrating since I'm anxiously waiting for it to arrive for me to get up and do the proper WW posture and exercise. Hope it will arrive soon.

Hi Lost - A diagnosis of prolapse is an inexact science at best. Whether you have it or not, getting into posture and living that way will do you a heap of good in all aspects of your life. Hope your WW stuff arrives soon! Meanwhile, keep that belly relaxed, chest up, protect the lumbar curvature whenever you can, and let's see if you start to feel better. I don't know anything about the tissue removal that you had done. If your expectation is to feel "the same as before delivery", I'm not sure that's totally realistic at this point in time. Get with the posture and try to relax about all this as much as you can. It will be better for you once you start to get into the book and DVD. - Surviving

Hi Lost

Do you know how much granulated tissue was removed? Has it all healed over? Two weeks isn't long for an open wound. Did you get any post-operative instructions? Are you having sitz baths,or any other treatment? Has the doctor signed off on the procedure? It is possible that it was a big episiotomy, and that could be still sore.

No doubt the mall had concrete floors, which would give anyone a sore back and legs.

Just because the doctor said you don't have rectocele doesn't necessarily mean that you don't have rectocele. You obviously didn't show any signs of it during the exam. Prolapses change all the time. If you get a bulge in your back vaginal wall, and you can put your thumb into your vagina and push it back gently into the vaginal wall, then that is rectocele, whether the doctor agrees or not. They don't know what you experience at other times.

What exactly have you done about your posture and your breathing?

Louise

Hi Louise,

I went to my gynae this morning for follow-up after the removal of my granulation tissues. My gynae has removed 2 granulations tissues and after today's check-up she said it has healed. I told her about the pain that I'm still experiencing and she did another checked for me and has confirmed again that there is no sign of prolapse. Besides using a speculum, she inserted her finger into my vaginal (sorry TMI) to check but can't find anything that relate to prolapse. She said that my uterus is high up (about the length of her finger). She asked me whether do I feel anything dropping ie. an egg dropping when walking/sitting which I didn't feel anything like that after the removal of my granulation tissue. It is just sore between my thigh (at the end of the vaginal area and also near the bump) Anyway, she will refer me to see a physio to see whether it would help.

Unfortunately, I can't tell whether there is a bulge behind the back of the vaginal wall because I'm really not good at checking myself but I feel sore everytime when I walk/stand for long. As far as I can see from the mirror, I don't see anything bulging.

As for the posutre, I'm still learning the correct way of WW posture but I haven't started on the breathing thing yet as I haven't receive my DVD and book which I've ordered weeks ago.

BTW, can you pls describe how does prolapse really look like? Is there any image that I can refer to?

Thanks.

The physio might be more help than the doctor.

Remember that removal of granulation tissue is a surgical procedure in itself. If you get a deep cut on your finger, and simply bind it up for a week or so, it will heal into a narrow line, but there are still nerves healing deeper in the skin, so it is very tender to touch for a couple of weeks. I imagine that there is still some healing below the skin level following the removal of granulation tissue. Give it time.

Louise

I just wanted to say that when you're healed up and your pain has gone away and you don't notice any symptoms of POP, please don't fall away from awareness of what you've found here at WW. I became a mother for the first time at 33 and was so nervous and uncertain of how to take care of my baby boy and myself. I had an induced labor, forceps delivery, episiotomy, impetigo from the hospital nursery, trouble breastfeeding. Eventually it all worked out (with a loving and supportive husband). I am small in frame and with four babies had three episiotomies and a tear. I had no difficulty healing; but with each child and the passing of time, I added more weight, more stress, worse eating habits causing chronic constipation, and a more sedentary life (less walking and exercise). These factors were added to the strain on my body of having had four pregnancies in five years (each 10 months with at least 8 pound babies) with the whole unnatural method of modern childbirth and the ignorance and/or silence among medical professionals and female relatives about POP. Finally, it seems to me that my weakened perineal tissue gradually stretched until my vaginal opening was larger and with my weight and posture eventually caused my cystocele and that the constipation contributed to the rectocele.

To get to the point - to me developing POP was a long and gradual process which I watched worsening over the years and continued in classic denial and avoidance. I could have instead avoided or decreased the effect of it with the awareness/knowledge, posture, exercise and support of other women like you'll find here. Even now at 62 with a "stage 3" cystocele, I have found improvement and hope of managing POP without surgery. So if you'll educate yourself and make WW principles like posture, exercise and a healthy diet your practice until it becomes part of your lifestyle, you may avoid a lot of trouble down the road as your family grows. I think the other older women here would agree that besides our own benefit we most want to educate and encourage our younger sisters and daughters to start taking care for yourselves now. We are pressed with responsibilities to our families (and jobs, etc.), but it is not selfish to take care of yourself. I think if we're doing what is truly righteous and good for our own souls, bodies, and spirits, we're setting an example for our children and others which is worth more than any imagined necessity or compulsion to keep up with the rest of the world.

You have every reason to hope for a happy family life and to learn to appreciate the troubles that come and make everything so much sweeter when they have passed. My four kids are adults and are fairly content and reasonable people. We had a lot of fun along the way. Oh, and we're not done yet.

Love this post! Thanks Bebe, you speak the truth. I hope anyone who is having a down day, and needs a little perspective on the issues, reads this. - Surviving

Thanks. I live for affirmation!

These are fundamental women's truths, and as older women, we need to find ways to gently encourage young women to listen to them.

Your words, "I think if we're doing what is truly righteous and good for our own souls, bodies, and spirits, we're setting an example for our children and others which is worth more than any imagined necessity or compulsion to keep up with the rest of the world. " are so true. We have to model what is good, right to the end of our lives. My Mum is nearly 101, and she is teaching me how to graciously live in a nursing home. Who else could teach me that?

Young women get caught up, like I did, with having all the right appliances in the kitchen, and a nice house for entertaining, and fashionable clothes that made us look acceptable to our peer group. It was all bulls*** , and I was somewhat aware of this at the time, (being a hippy who turned straight for some time), but there wasn't a lot I could do about it at the time. It was as if I was caught up in a whirlpool of consumer activity, and I was not able to escape it.

I think all we can do is to point out some fundamental self-evident truths to young women, and they will take it in, if they have more 'common' sense than 'keeping up with the Joneses' sense. Much of that comes from their upbringing, but sometimes they do 'get it' in spite of their upbringing. We can only do what we can do.

These sorts of fundamental truths are:-

- Your vagina was designed to birth your babies.
- Your sexual organs are for reproduction and enjoyment, and shouldn't be messed with during birth.
- Breasts are primarily for feeding babies. They are also highly attractive to men, and are erogenous zones, which is why some women really enjoy breastfeeding, while others find it really unnerving and unpleasant.
- Always remember the connection between breasts, butts, attraction, sex, babies, baby food and men. These are fundamentally connected words.
- Breasts and a bottom that move independently of the rest of the body, and which lie visually outside the line of the rest of the body, are normal. Don't try and tuck them in or your reproductive and sexual organs are likely react by trying to move out of home.
- Your body will loosen up on the inside after a pregnancy and birth. There is no escaping this.
- Suffering is a part of life. Nobody, and nothing is perfect. Get over it and get on with it.
- Your body was designed to keep all its organs inside. Sometimes we fly in the face of these design features. Then we have to re-learn how to manage our female body.
- The Creator knows better than The Surgeon how your body works.
- A woman carries the primary responsibility for her own health and wellbeing.
- A woman is allowed to cut herself some slack and not be perfect.
- A woman is allowed to make mistakes, and forgive herself, and move on.
- A woman is allowed to have her own re-creation near the top of her list of priorites in life, up there with family responsibilities.
- Foods of plant origin with minimal processing are essential for good nutrition.
- Meat is not essential for good nutrition, but dead animals taste so good (to most people) that it is not likely that minimally processed, and pasture reared meat is really bad for you! Enjoy it, but not at the expense of plant origin foods.
- Even though your ovaries no longer produce oestrogen in any quantity after menopause, other parts of your body still produce plenty. Oestrogen *deficiency* is not the cause of menopause changes.

Got any others?

Try as we might Louised I don’t think we can get away from the fact that we are first and foremost omnivores. I don’t see the chances of living a long life without at least the occasional meal of meat as very strong. Learnt from sad observation.

As to the creator’s design versus the surgeon’s knowledge, I don’t really see the connection here. Child birth has had a high mortality rate for mother and child throughout the ages. Surgeons do what they can. In some cases it is not good enough, and maybe their approach is flawed, but some owe their lives to their efforts.

cheers, Fab

Well, I am a healthy, ethical omnivore, and I know many like me. I also know lots of healthy vegetarians. We could argue this for days.

I think whether or not we eat meat pales into insignificance when we compare it to other potential life enders like engaging in extreme sports; dressing like a seal when swimming in Australian waters; taking recreational drugs of dubious origin, or drinking large quantities of legal alcohol on a regular basis; consorting with colourful underworld identities; driving a car on the road; smoking cigarettes; driving through red lights; suffering mental illness almost anywhere in the world; being born an indigenous Australian in Australia.

Re "The Creator knows better than The Surgeon how your body works", in the area of repairing pelvic organ prolapse, surgeons change the way our soft tissues stabilise our organs, counter to the way in which our bodies were designed to work. This often results in more suffering for the woman than prior to the repairs. Women are told by their gyn surgeons often enough that pelvic organ support repairs are 'just a little routine op' that will solve all their problems, not realising the other effects it will have on other parts of their anatomy, and not knowing what questions to ask, in order to find out what can go wrong.

The decision to surgically override the way we were designed needs more careful consideration and research than is usually done prior to deciding to undergo the repairs.

I don't for one moment compare:-
- saving mothers and babies during childbirth;
- making a thumb out of a finger to restore some function to a badly damaged hand;
- or bringing a brain-injured accident victim from coma to full recovery and brain function with their skills,

with an elective pelvic organ support repair.

The first two are life saving. The latter is not life saving, and there is always a risk that a repair can leave the woman worse off, and with poorer prognosis than prior to the surgery.

Sometimes a repair works well and for a long time. Sometimes it is better for the woman if the surgeon *does not* do what he can, but leaves well alone. It might not be perfect but "Do no harm" is a basic principle of medicine that is too often ignored. The way God made us is a good place to start. There are good reasons why every bit of our body is designed the way it is. The human body is awesome in its complexity and wisdom! For a surgeon to meddle with it unnecessarily is folly.

I have had enough close calls with death myself to know the value of good medical care, and I am very thankful for that. There is no question about that.

Louise

Re omnivore and vegetarians: No I don’t think we could argue this for days. Ultimately, one of us would have to bring sufficient proof to the table.

Re creator design and surgeons: Is this a religious argument between creationism and evolution? If so, it has no place on this forum.

cheers, Fab

Re bringing sufficient proof to the table, I will have mine rare, please.

Re creator design and surgeons: No, it has nothing to do with a religious argument. It is about being born with a body that is perfectly designed to do what it has to do, and that it doesn't need to be altered surgically without very very very good reasons. Any surgical alteration will impact in other parts of the body, often with negative effects that create the need for further surgery.

Louise, I agree with everything you've said and have little to add. I also agree that this forum is no place for religious arguments, but there is no place where truth isn't appropriate. We know there's a difference between religious arguments and truth. What happens is that when someone tells a truth that another is always ready to disagree with, a religious argument ensues if the truth-teller will allow it.

I hear along with the voices of both hope and despair a lot of anger here, and I don't think I'm reaching too far to say that many women (and others in distress) blame God and believe him to be incompetent (at best, and mean at the worst). Of course, most people won't say it or allow themselves to know that they think that way. I have thought so in the past and thank him for showing me his true nature. I'm not a deist nor am I religious or denominational. I am a believer of the truth, a free Christian. Since it's the essence of who I am, it is expressed in all I say - but I won't be preaching or trying to persuade anyone to convert.

The thing that I've found most impressive about Ms. Kent's work is that it is based on fact and recognizes the beauty and function of our bodies as they were created. She also makes clear that the problems we have in first developing and then dealing with POP is in the wrong-headedness of our culture...societal and medical. That's what makes it useful and that's why it can be dealt with. And we have reason to expect physical improvement because we are self-healing and resilient by design.

The fact that so many women experience POP means there is a tiny flaw in this perfect 'design'. There is no point in being angry at the creator, or surgeons or yourself. Where there is a problem we recognize it for what it is and try to fix it.

cheers, Fab

I wish I could give you a hug, because I totally understand what you are feeling! I am a young mother of 2, 6 months pregnant with #3, and I was diagnosed with a prolapse right before becoming pregnant. There are times when I am still angry about it. There are times when I feel so much despair- afraid that it will get worse, and feeling as though I am "ruined". I sometimes cry at night because I just want it to go away. But then I remember that I am not alone. There are so many wonderful, knowledgeable, understanding, sympathetic women on here who will listen to you. I've posted about my despair a few times, with no shortage of encouragement. Just knowing that there are people who understand can have such a big impact on how you deal with this "hiccup" in your life plans.
I wish I could offer more advice, but I am new to this, too. But hang in there, and don't hesitate to come here when you are feeling down about your situation. I hope you are able to find some answers, advice, and encouragement.

I love your turn of phrase Fab. You strike me as being very wry and witty.

As a complete and utter materialist, I must admit I cringe when I hear people say that we are 'designed' to do this and 'designed' to do that. I realize people often use this as a metaphor for the way we have evolved. As in the configuration we have ended up with rather than imputing some sort of conscious creator. I laughed when I was watching the Battle Star Gallatica TV series and the doctor character said something about the cylons being completely designed but with the same plumbing as humans.

Anyway, it's lucky for us that Christine's work does not rely on such notions of 'design'.

Onward and upward!

"The evolution of the female pelvic organ support system is an exquisite story of how nature used the limiting forces of stress and gravity to create our fully human capacity to stand, walk, run, and leap - sometimes while singing and holding an infant. As you will see next, many things in our modern lives cause this magnificent design to weaken and collapse. However, the sacred way in which bone, muscle, ligament, fascia, and vessels are woven together into a seamless whole allows for a lifetime of enjoying our full human potential as well as the grace of regaining that capacity by returning to the original form and function of our natural design." ....Christine Kent from Saving the Whole Woman, second edition, page 29.

If you suppose by this that I am making a concession to evolution, it's not necessary. I personally evolved from the combination of an egg and sperm. The Latin base of the word "evolution" means to unroll or fold open...evidenced in our own growth and development. Darwin's postulations from his observations were on the way to the discovery of genetics. He was pre-Mendel. He had enough information to make inferences and develop an hypothesis on the origin of man. He had a little more information and was able to develop a theory about natural selection. Moses also contemplated nature and by his observation and experience expressed it in mythological form. He, too, got a lot of things right. (Mythology itself is a way of expressing an essential truth.) Men since then have developed technology to be able to observe and prove the amazingly complicated parts, functions, and purposes of cells which are evidence (both the cells and the men who made ways of observing them being evidence) of the creative genius and power of life that underlies all things. Why do we even exist if not to find these things out and desire to search out that Life? Religion only suppresses the expectation of knowing God.

if we use the system or machine in a way other than how it was designed to be used, who's to blame then when it breaks down? I've strong conviction that our pelvic support system is perfect but only as perfect as this life is - after all, it's only a number of years before the entire system from head to toe fails us! If my pelvic support system lasts me for the brief time I'm alive I am one happy camper.

Yessss!!!!