getting worse postpartum

Submitted by FiveMinutesPeace on January 2, 2015 - 9:33am
Body: 

Hi, I'm a new member here and have been reading the forums avidly for the last few weeks, having ordered Christine's book and second wheel DVD. Very glad to have found this place, as most seem to be!

I'm six weeks postpartum after birthing (VBAC) my second child: a pretty easy birth apart from some coached "purple" pushing for an hour and second degree tear. It was all healing nicely but I noticed the baggy, draggy feeling at 3 weeks, after a bad cough. PT and consultant said they noticed nothing pathological… whatever that means, and I was on my back at the time. Of course I've been instructed to do kegels, and am due another check in a couple of weeks.

Since I've been managing my toddler and infant alone, the feeling's getting worse: from a loose dragging feeling in the vagina, to a definite bulging (the horror!). The way it affects my mood is immense - that I can't run with or lift my toddler daughter, or sling my baby, is a biggie. I was such a gung-ho fan of natural birth - now I wish I'd gone for the repeat C-section that some advised, or at leas known enough to ignore instructions to bear down in such a big rush! Sigh.

Anyway, I'm working on the posture but there are so many occasions where my practise is bad, just through sheer tiredness or lack of options. I'm at a loss to know which would be the main culprit in the worsening of my symptoms:

severe sleep deprivation!
(5kg) infant won't be put down - lots of lifting (in posture) and walking with him in arms (mostly in posture);
3 nights in 7 he'll sleep on my chest and abdomen, me propped up at the worst angle on a load of cushions;
ditto feeding every 2 hours - I try for in posture cross-legged or lying down, but often i'm too tired and slump back;
very occasional pick-ups of my 2 year-old
stopping my kegels?
breathing into my abdomen without managing to fully relax the muscles there?

I realise from reading here there might be a 4 month symptom peak to hit yet, but I'd like to help myself as much as I can, and the book is yet to arrive!

Thanks for any advice, and for a wonderful set of resources for starters.

Forum:

Surviving60

January 2, 2015 - 11:19am

Hi FMP and welcome. Great advice from SafelyHeld who has really done her homework here! If you are in doubt about the Kegels, please read Christine's articles. I personally did them for decades. They don't work, they just aggravate the problem, and here's why:
https://wholewoman.com/blog/?p=1497
https://wholewoman.com/blog/?p=118
-- Surviving

Surviving60

January 2, 2015 - 11:57am

Your posts are great and you can do a much better job of relating to the PP experience than I can. Say whatever you think is helpful to a newbie. You've done a lot of WW work and a lot of thoughtful research in your relatively short time here. Don't worry, someone will jump in if they feel the need, don't be paranoid. - Surviving

Aussie Soul Sister

January 2, 2015 - 3:51pm

Dear SafelyHeld,
Your enthusiastic and caring help on this forum is so appreciated - thankyou so much for helping particularly new mothers with your valuable experiences, & referencing older threads.
I wish you a speedy recovery with your health.
Best wishes,
Aussie Soul Sister

chickaboom

January 4, 2015 - 4:01pm

For the first few months pp, I lay down with the baby - a lot. Whenever she wants to breastfeed, I take her to my bed and bf side-lying. I realize this might not be easy to do but I made it a priority, even with my other kids needing my attention. I just needed that 15-20 min period every few hours to relieve me of that dragging feeling. I read recently that laying down - even without sleeping - reenergizes the adrenals so to speak and I think new moms are most in need of that!

Surviving60

January 4, 2015 - 5:05pm

I agree. I did some side-lying while breastfeeding both of mine. But most of my breastfeeding was done slouched in a semi-seated position in a waterbed. Oh if only I had known!! - Surviving

Aging gracefully

January 4, 2015 - 5:16pm

Lol! I remember the old waterbed! And, those things were so hard to get out of, especially pregnant!
I did most of my breastfeeding side lying. Baby and I were always more comfortable that way.

Surviving60

January 4, 2015 - 6:49pm

I do recall that the waterbed was absolute heaven for sleeping in the last weeks of pregnancy. But yes, getting out of bed over those funky padded rails was hard work from about 7 or 8 months until the end!- Surviving

FiveMinutesPeace

January 5, 2015 - 1:26pm

I've never even seen a water bed :)

I was really touched by SafelyHeld's warm words and all the supportive comments... I didn't realise how much that would help, so thank you, kind ladies of WW!

We've got two flights of stairs in the house so lying down in the day is a bit tricky but I'll manage it at least once at nap time. Little one is getting the hang of side feeding, but I'll often need to walk and walk to resettle him at night, and he's a real velcro baby in the day.

I just tried slinging for the first time this evening (hence I can write on here!) and find that with the sling high on my chest/upper abdomen, and in posture, I don't feel any vulva pressure at all. It's hard on the shoulders though, so it'll be a measure for five minutes' peace only, I should think. Shame - I've missed it so much - love having him close and so peaceful.