rectocele, rectal prolasape cystocele

Hi my name is guenevere. I had a hystorectomy at 28 and since was a child have had severe constipation, always needing to take a laxitive or perdiem. I am about to have surgery to repair the rectal prolaspe and rectalocele and cystacele. Two years ago I didn't have a cystocele. I have gone thru so many test it crazy. I put off surgery for so long I have no other choice. When my bowels get full I cant urinate until they are empty. I can't even empty my bowels now because of rectal prolaspe. Here's what I think happened. Years of being constipated and straining and having two 9 pound babies gave me the rectocele and still straining and a weak pelvic floor gave me the rectal prolaspe and the pushing on my bladder and not being able to empty cystocele. Also they are considering taking out my colon and large intestions. Seeing that I have had a lifetime of constpation that my large intestions work slow and not properly. They are cosidering taking out my colon too because the abuse of laxitives have caused my colon to be lazy. I've expericed so much pain for the last 10 years and have do so many things to prolong surgery. I have been very limited and I am only 36. I am scared when I read your stories. I had 5 surgeries most of them for the hestorectomy they took me apart peice by peice. I delevoped aheshions. I even woke up in one surgery so going thru this and knowing the recovery time and all that it intells worries me I can't sleep at night. But like I said I am to fat gone to do nothing. Because of the rectal prolaspe even an intama stayed up in me. I found some releife by squating on the toliet. This is only after take enough laxitives to make my stool liquid. I feel confident that if I survive the surgery that I will motivate myself to recover. I have 3 childern 19 who is in Japan and an 11 and 10 year old. I know how it feels to feel useless powerless and a burden on your family. Not being able to take care of your family or yourself. I pray to god and hope that I will feel my age after the surgery and recovery. I also want to add that I have no incontines I wish I could urinate and have bowel movements. thanks for your time. Also I used for the health food store for years and it works for those that arent surgery bound yet yeast cleanse and colon cleanse and asphodoliphlis it worked very well and I saw a chiropracter. I will let you know how surgery goes. Thanks guenevere