All ladies with young ones!

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O.k. ladies this is off topic but I have to ask - what on earth do you do with a toddler (18 months) that refuses to keep her nappy (diaper) on? It does not matter what clothes I put on her she manages to get it off and no sooner is it off then she piddles on the floor and on two occasions poo'd - yuck!

She finds this hilarious and thinks it is a game and I am at my wits end as to what to do. She is too young to potty train yet.

My 6 year old is horrified! :o)

A

My daughter did this - As I was using pampers I used sellotape (scotch tape i think the americans call it) in a ring in a ring in a ring and she couldnt get it off!

Eventually once they can't doit they stop trying

Good luck
Sue

Look into the eyes - They hold the key!
http://www.bringmadeleinehome.com/img/maddy544x150Banner.jpg

I've got her in pull ups and even when she is in a vest that does up underneath she manages to stretch the nappy down and step out. Its an absolute nightmare!

A

A,

I trained all my kids at 18 months. Are you sure she's not ready?

If they're talking they're ready!

Of course we used cloth diapers - there is a difference in a child's desire to get out of those!

Judy

Change what you can change; be happy with what you cannot.

She has only just started saying her first words - Mummy, Daddy and she tries Sadie (the cat) but it comes out Dadie LOL. I think she is a bit of a late talker although she babbles all day long in her own language! She does usually let us know as soon as she has done a poo by waiving her hand in front of her face as if to say pooey but I just don't feel she is ready. I didn't actually train my son until he was 2 1/2!

Perhaps I will get a potty in readiness and see what she thinks about it.

A

My friend had a problem with this and she put sleepers on her daughter backwards until she was over this "phase" and it worked!

we went through that with my dd. its funny later on, so write it in the baby book.

we tried tape, putting the dipes on backwards, overalls, you name it and the houdini child got out of them every time.

no advice here, sorry!

this too shall pass.......

Yes, our sweet little angel would smear poo all over her crib DAILY! So, here's what we did...
We took zip up pajamas and turned them inside out and backward. Put a snap crotch tshirt on underneath, and then, a shirt on top of it. We cut the feet out of the pajamas and put socks on her. That pretty much helped, but the pajamas had to fit closely or she would just pull them off. I'm soooo glad that's over with!!!!!

Hi Anita

I agree with Judy. I think she is demonstrating to you that she is ready. In a world where there are no toilets and potties I think you would say that she had just trained herself.

She is doing the important stage of independent toileting, which is getting her knickers off before she wees or poos. You have got to admit that it saves washing clothes, even if you need to clean floors more.

All you gotta do now is catch her taking her diaper off and keep the potty close by (one BTWin every room??) on a cleanable surface (in case of misses). Keep it in a prominent place so you can get her onto it as soon as the diaper comes off, and give her praise. Then all she needs to do is learn to take her diaper off next to the potty. Toddlers are not stupid. She is giving you cues. Just follow her cues without forcing the issue. The sooner you do this the sooner she will learn to tell you she needs the potty. Otherwise she will have to unlearn taking her pants off when *you* are ready to potty train!

I think this training phase will be short. It happens eventually with all babies, even happened to us!

IMHO, saying you potty train toddlers from 2 years is simply to discourage parents thinking they can potty train a newborn (as some used to do, probably still do!). All you end up with is very few dirty nappies and a very well-trained parent of a neurotic baby!

BTW, how would you like to keep your nappy on and wee or poo in it and wait for somebody else to tell you your nappy needed changing?? I think you have one kid with very good commonsense!

Have fun. It will soon be over.

Cheers

Louise

Thanks Louise,

Just as an added note: When my son and daughter in law and grandchildren lived in China a few years ago, they were really interested and appalled by the fact that the Chinese do not use diapers. The very idea that poo and pee would be "saved" in a diaper close to their baby was unthinkable.

Agnes said that poo and pee were all over everything, streets, restaurants, department store floors, playgrounds, and the children were all bared bottomed. At the same time, the child sleeps with the mother for several years and pees in the bed. The apartments reek of urine.

I suppose training comes more easily to a Chinese child than to someone in diapers? The whys make an interesting idea.

Two things come to mind: When we used cloth diapers, they were a lot of work, but they were uncomfortable and stinky. Children were eager to let go of this, and parents were eager to be freed of 40 loads of laundry a week.

What I'm seeing now is a lot of children who are comfortable right into the fours in paper diapers. Parents are keeping children young and not training them because they aren't going to have more than one or two and parents really enjoy younger children. That repression does a lot of damage later on.

The best time to train a child is between 18 months and 26 months because it is then children want to please and will take delight in mom's smile and this rather substantial success. Waiting to three only creates a war zone because at three, the independence factor is the number one agenda in a child's life.

At 18 months, children can go on their own very nicely. It should take 3 days to train a child. There's a lot of mess for the first couple of days, but it's worth it. First step is to sit down with them and talk to them about it - briefly - set a timer for about an hour, and take the child. If they go, give them a treat. It sounds very old fashioned, and it is, but it works.

Having trained more children than I could count, it's worth it for the child. There are three big freedoms in childhood: toilet training, reading, and driving a car. Getting a child through toilet training pushes him more quickly to the next step - reading. Why do that? Because reading is a lot more fun than toilet training!

Judy

Change what you can change; be happy with what you cannot.

This post CRacked me up. Oh my. Neither of my "perfect" children did such things.
Although I think my teenager is considering it. My son just hacked up something nasty and
had to show me. Precious.
So - um- GOOD luck with that !
Zelda

I only use diapers for sleeping- by 18 months my kiddos go in the pot (or other designated area)- my baby right now is 15 months and he goes potty in the tub-

Since joining this site I have really thought alot about the potty habits of children vs. adults and I have decided babes got it right- so unless they really want to go sitting down on the toilet we get creataive. No constipation probs in this house lol.

Bravo, Alemama!

I wish more parents would follow your example. Kids would be a lot more creative!

Judy

Change what you can change; be happy with what you cannot.

I think there are lots of 'rules' about how to do it right, from elimination communication from birth to diapers until age four. as everything, I think it depends on the child.
my kids all led their own toilet training, my dd at 2, my ds's at 3. no power struggles either.
this is the first time I'm using cloth diapers so we'll see if there's any difference.

my dd's been peeing standing up ever since her younger brother potty trained. she kinda straddles the toilet and leans over to support herself on the tank.

the stripping off of the diaper phase that my dd went through was less about potty training than it was about wanting to be naked. and she loved the reaction of course. I'd chase her around with the dipe, it was a fantastically funny (for her) game.

OMG…I remember wanting to do that when I was a little girl after watching my dad pee. My mother was horrified and I certainly never tried it again! It's such pure relief to hear healthy mothers talking about loving and fearless childrearing.

Just a funny note:

When I built my school the plumber asked how far off the floor I wanted the urinal. I said 4 inches. I suppose I was deadpan serious, because those plumbers thought it was so funny. It's worked however, and the training is really simple.

Love the tub thing.

Had a friend who let her son go outside.

By going light and easy, children train so much quicker. Mine trained each other.

My generation has always been so concerned about bathroom habits. I take a lesson from the kids namely that bathroom habits are funny, so keep it light. Want to entertain a room full of noisy boys? Just say, "Poop." Then you can make it educational by finding words that rhyme.

Judy

Change what you can change; be happy with what you cannot.

I think alot of it with my daughter is the freedom of running around naked. She loves having a bath and when she gets out likes nothing more than to charge around and let the air dry her off! It must feel really nice for her and I don't blame her. In fact she has just taken her nappy off again and is playing happily and I know she doesn't need the toilet as she has not long had a dirty nappy changed.

I will figure this one out one way or the other.

Thanks.

A

Before I got the prolapse, I was just beginning to try Elimination Communication with my then 4 month old. I actually got it to the point where I could make a "pst pst" noise and he would pee in the potty. But I have since really slacked off with that because lifting him all the time is harder now. He's in cloth diapers mostly, although I'm currently alternating with disposables because last week he developed a really horrible diaper rash.

When I did some reading on the matter, I found that the idea of "late" toilet training emerged in the '60's, due to some studies which were funded by Proctor and Gamble... the maker of Pampers! Early toilet training was considered cruel, and probably was, considering some early 20th century "punishment' methods I read about. Anyways, this is all academic, because I have yet to seriously attempt to potty train my baby (now just 8 months old).

Hi Gracemom

It sounds like elimination communication has come a long way in the last 40 years, but by the sounds of it, is still only an additional stage of diaper avoidance, and trains the baby somewhat like Pavlov's dogs to respond to external cues. What happens when somebody at school goes "psss psss" in ther ear???? <:-o> It doesn't actually train the baby, apart from training them in semiconscious body awareness. It trains the caregiver though!! It also gives the caregiver control of when the baby eliminates, even more than diapering. It still doesn't recognise when the baby is ready to eliminate like an adult and teach them how to do it themselves, which I always thought was what potty training was all about. If you do it when the baby is ready, and you have prolapses, it takes an awful lot of that physical lifting in an awkward position out of the equation, that's for sure!

I wouldn't be too sure that it would make elimination management any easier for the parent, or smoother for the baby, especially as it seems from my brief reading to be something that you can do in conjunction with sometimes using diapers, so two systems are operating in the baby's mind anyway (ie "I can pee in my diaper anytime I like", and "I wait for the magic cue to give me permission to eliminate"). This has to dilute the benefit of elimination communication.

I can see that it would have potential when you don't want to use diapers, like at at the beach, or when the baby has nappy rash, but it sounds like much harder work than putting a bucket full of nappies through the wash every day, or forking out and carting round all those 'undisposble' nappies.

Anyway, it was interesting to see that somebody is thinking about the alternatives, and it doesn't cost the earth anything (except flushing every time baby eliminates, which would use an awful lot of fresh water over 18 months.) Nice to have another tool too, but I really think babies show us when they are ready, just like any other milestone, and we just need to be aware of their cues, rather than the other way around.

Cheers

Louise

I really haven't done too much reading up on it, but my impression was that a caregiver could learn to read the baby's cues and bring baby to the toilet in time. until baby is old enough to do it themselves.
and also could teach baby to void on cue, which is a useful skill that we all use (I pee before I leave the house even if I don't 'have' to go).
aside from the lifting involved, it doesn't seem much different to me than feeding on demand. read baby's cues that he's hungry and feed him THEN, and also offer a nipple if you know you won't be able to before baby's apt to want more.

too much thinking for me, so I didn't try it, but I see the attraction. and cloth diapers are way too cute to bypass.