new - trying posture - feel like I'm gaping!

Body: 

Hi, there, this is my first post on this site. I have ordered the book, but in the meantime am trying to figure out this posture thing. As I sit on my chair at work, I try to relax my shoulders, raise my ribcage - but the problem comes with that belly/tailbone thing. I am an apple body shape, so I have a poochy tummy to begin with. If I am reading the instructions correctly, I'm supposed to be just totally letting my belly go - not tensing the muscles at all - and pushing my tailbone slightly outward.

First of all, is it correct that I should not be tensing any abdomen muscles AT ALL while sitting and standing? I have always thought that strong abdominal muscles were the key to good posture and assist with correct spinal alignment. And when I let my belly go, and tuck my tailbone out, it feels as if my vagina is just gaping open. This is not a good feeling. It feels as if there's no support AT ALL down there now, and it feels as if everything is going to just fall out.

Conversely, when I sit "normally," i.e., with my tailbone tucked in, I don't get that "hanging out" feeling. When I tuck my tailbone in I sort of get more of a "compact" feeling, like nothing is hanging loose. Does this make sense? On thinking about it, it seems as if with the tailbone tucked in, my "opening" is pushed slightly out, which feels more supportive, but with it pushed back, it feels like with everything pointed straight down, gravity is creating an uncomfortable pull. I don't notice this when standing, only when sitting.

By the way, I have no formal diagnosis . . . yet. I had a failed endometrial ablation on November 30, and nothing has been right since then. I don't know if I just got jostled around too much during that procedure and things moved around, or what. Prior to the surgery I had no symptoms indicative of prolapse, although my gyn told me that both my bladder and rectum had fallen "slightly." Immediately after the procedure, I felt a discomfort that has persisted. I've been looking around down there, but as others have said, I don't remember what I looked like before to know if anything looks diffent now!

Thank you in advance for any input/advice, I truly appreciate it - I will be posting once more on this board today about a symptom that is truly driving me nuts and I have got to have an explanation for it, if I can get one.

Hello and welcome to the forum. I am not the best to comment on posture as I am still trying to perfect it myself and not sure if I have it down 100% yet.

I do get the gapping feeling at times or should I say more like my vagina feels more open when moving around in posture. I don't know why that is. I do find that when sitting in posture I am not overly comfortable at times. I can actually feel my prolapses more than if I was slumped in a bad posture. I hate being in the car as that is when I can feel them most and I really don't feel comfortable at all.

The best way to find out if you have prolapses is to do the self exam which Christine explains on the homepage under the "Resources" and "Articles" section. Although if you have minor prolapses they may feel different to what is shown. Some women describe a cystocele (bladder prolapse) as feeling like a half drainpipe which is how mine started but last time I checked it felt more like 3/4 of a drainpipe and a bit more bulgy at the top. My rectocele (bowel prolapse) on last check was like a small grape sitting just inside the entrance although when moving around tonight it felt more like a golf ball! Bit scared to check it again in case it has grown.

Like you and probably the majority of us I did not know exactly what I looked/felt like before prolapse so I cannot make a comparison. I just know how I feel and that there are lumps that should not be there.

Take care and I hope you are able to find some relief from the posture and you find an answer to your other problem.

Anita

Having had prolapses since 2000 and still no surgery, I think I am a walking qualification on this unique posture.

First of all - eye a toddler. Check out that baby's posture. That is what you want to copy. Don't have a baby to stare at? Then...lean back against a wall and "hug" it with your entire length. Where your body is touching is how you want to step away and adopt. Note the butt will "jut" out a bit; there will be a small curvature of the lower back and the lower tummy should not be tightened. Stand tall; lower shoulders and tuck in chin a bit. Nothing exaggerated. When I first did this, I exaggerated and boy...did I hurt. Now it comes as second nature. I have the universal prolapses. I don't know the Grades as it has been quite a while since I have had them checked. I literally forgot about them. They were initially UP, Grade II cystocele and a "small" rectocele. What it is now, I couldn't tell you. No doubt entering menopause (without a period in 8 years) the anatomy of my insides may have changed but the feeling remains unchanged.

Obviously giving "advice" to the women who have had surgery is a bit harder. One needs the entire number of pelvic organs in order to make this work - free floating. Tying, excising - I am going to assume does not bode well in attempting to adopt some of the suggestions shared on this forum. Perhaps that is why Christine (and I also) strongly suggest this first before submitting to the scapel. Besides...it is literally unsafe to go into a hospital. That is my thinking on this.

Hope I may offered some helpful advice.

sybille

Just like to say that Sybille has answered one of my questions about prolapses getting worse and that is, they don't necessarily. Also pleased to know that the posture is a definite factor in stopping things getting worse - along with no straining on the loo, healthy eating, etc etc. I have had my prolapses for 2.5 years - it is good to know that they may stay the same for many more years. Although my doctor said my cervix was a finger length up, I was examined lying down and as has been pointed out here, when you stand, things don't stay up, or in my case, they go up and down!! I never found out whether I had a cystocele as well, but I am pretty sure I do (as well as UP). I am also pretty sure I don't have a rectocele though. I guess I should be grateful for that at least. Walking is a must for me, plus I enjoy it. I think it is good for your pelvic floor, and I still do a few kegels (some of them I do standing up) because I think they do help with the bladder weakness. I have not had a period for a year and there was a year between my last two periods, so I guess I'm getting through menopause. I think not having periods avoids some of the really bad days with prolapse, although I do get bad days so there might be some residual effect still. I notice there is a menopause forum here so I must check it out sometime.
Cheers,
Wendy

Sybille - Standing against the wall - what a good idea! I tried it and it really works! When I feel myself getting out of posture (even at work) it's easy to back up to a wall and realign myself.

Thanks for the tip.

Goldfinch

'Life is not holding a good hand; Life is playing a poor hand well'

Do you mean standing with your heels against the wall because when I back up into a wall and put my heels against it and then the rest of my body I find I have to tilt my top half slightly backwards so I can get my upper back touching. Is this just because I have a big butt?! Its only slightly but I think I get what you are trying to say and I think I have got the posture right.

Thank you so much, the toddler and wall imagery definitely helps me get a better grasp.

I do wish I had known about all this before my procedure. I can only hope that, as nothing has been removed from my body, I stand a better chance of healing somewhat or at least arresting any further development, than those who have had hysterectomies. I shudder to think that might have been my next step.

I want to do whatever I can to help myself. Compounding all this is the heavy bleeding I have had. Anxious to see if it continues to do this. I have about decided that even if it does, I think I can live with one or two days of horrendous bleeding per month until I hit menopause. I'm 47 now.

ATS - I couldn't help but laugh at your big butt comment. I myself have NO butt whatsoever but instead a big tummy. So, I feel like when I'm trying to do this posture thing I am making myself look about 7 months pregnant! You know what, if it helps, I don't care WHAT I look like!

Emily

I have the big butt AND tummy - what a state I look!! But like you say who cares if it works.

I watch my 19 month old daughter when she is moving around and she has a definate curve in her spine with a big round belly that sticks out in front and a straight upper back.

I've always had quite heavy periods especially since having kids but I have found that doing the Maya Massage has helped with that.

I sit in front of a computer at work and sit with my shoulders back and down, tushie jutted towards the back a bit and sitting as far forward on top of the pelvic bone (clitoris) area. This of course forces one to sit straight with shoulders drawn down. Do not tighten your lower abdomen. To my way of thinking, that tightening adds pressure to the pelvic core. I really cannot feel anything gapping. Kind of like solid contact with the chair. And it looks quite "elegant."

sybille

Hello,
I was just reading your post regarding the posture and you mentioned you last had a period 8 years ago. Then you stated you are now entering menopause. Haven't you been in menopause for the past 8 years?

I will be a year without a period in April 2008. I assume at that point I am in active menopause. I am incorrect about this?

belianne

Hello,
I was just reading your post regarding the posture and you mentioned you last had a period 8 years ago. Then you stated you are now entering menopause. Haven't you been in menopause for the past 8 years?

I will be a year without a period in April 2008. I assume at that point I am in active menopause. I am incorrect about this?

belianne

Perimenopause begins as many as 15 years before the cessation of periods. The actual meno is the nine months that follows the cessation of periods.

Actually trying to put a date on the whole project is like trying to put a date on puberty. You may have gotten a period at 11, but there are so many other considerations to puberty.

The whole crazypause process for me took about 7 years.

One year to date after periods began another nightmare time. Two and a half years later I finally surfaced. The doc said it would be 9 months ---swim?

Judy