My birth story and prolapse issues.

Submitted by meri3 on June 26, 2005 - 11:29am
Body: 

Hello. I wrote back in December 2004, I think. I had a uterine prolapse at 3 months of pregnancy. Was terrified and depressed. After my doctor pushed it in with a pessary which I only wore for 2 days, it stayed up. I did much research about giving birth and wanted to do so in a manner which would not cause further damage to my organs. I was going to opt for a c-section but decided to give birth naturally in a squat position. I informed my doctor of my choice and she said it would be o.k. Well I gave birth 5 days after my actual due date. My water bag broke in the morning and my husband and I went to the hospital (my last time to give birth in a hospital). I informed my nurse of my choice of position for birth, squatting. She didn't look to happy about this. I asked to walk during my early contractions. She said no that I was not going to be able to since I had melonium ?(how do you spell it melconium? baby's poop in the amniotic fluid). I insisted that I wanted to walk and after asking the doctor, not my own, another from the same office whom I only had met once, he said that I could. My own doctor never showed for the delivery.

Well, I walked during contractions and they were so much easier to handle that way. I listened to my body and positioned myself on my knees holding on to the top of my bed when I could no longer walk the strong contractions. I later lied on my side during the strongest contractions. The babys head was now only 2 inches from emerging. I wasn't sure exactly when to push and my nurse said nothing to help me or help me get into the position I wanted. My husband wasn't sure what to do either. Well, I started to feel the urge to push and the contractions were more than I could stand. The doctor (not mine) came in and right away the nurses told me to get on my back and then grabbed my legs and put them in stirups. I was horrified and began crying and telling them that I wanted to squat and now that I was on my back semi upright the pain had doubled. I told my husband to please help me but he was unsure of what to do. I then begged to give birth squatting. The doctor said o.k. but no one helped me get into position. Then a contraction came again and I had to push the doctor yelled, "You no longer have the option of squatting." One leg stayed in the stirup and I pulled one out of the other. After two pushes in excruciating pain I gave birth with no tearing. I could not walk after the birth. I had horrible pelvic pain on my right side. After the 2nd day I thought I felt something in my vagina and panicked. I asked a nurse to check me and she said she felt my cervix in place. I felt great! Back at home I examined myself and saw a bulge in my vagina that was not familiar, not like my cervix when I had the first prolapse. After further investigation and research I have discovered that it is my bladder and behind it I can see a bit of my cervix. Imagine my disappointment. I cried and cried yesterday in my husband's arms. I felt so exhausted and depressed. I had come to terms with the fact that I may experience uterine prolapse again, but had not even thought of having another different prolapse. I do not know how to deal with a cystocele. Can it be pushed back with the sea sponge? Will the sea sponge hold up the cervix and the bladder? I don't understand how the bladder can fall into the vagina?
I am trying to be positive. I know that God will not give us more than we can handle and I am trusting in HIm to help me get through this situation and bring my healing. I am doing my best to rest and eat well. I have two young children plus my baby who is now 11 days old. I thank God for my many blessings and am grateful that I do not have a life threatening disease. I have healthy children and a wonderful husband who is my greatest help and support right now. The baby I just gave birth to is an incredibly beautiful child. My husband and I are amazed at how beautiful he is. I thank God he is also healthy. I am trying to keep my stress level down now by praying and maintaining a positive attitude. I have been having trouble breastfeeding and since my emotional bout yesterday I noticed I have a lot less of a milk supply. I am glad I have a place to express my feeling and receive feedback from those who are in a similar situation. I have read fullofgrace's entries and would like to know how she is faring of late. Thank you Christine for you website, book and dvd. I just received them yesterday and have yet to watch the dvd. I did try the healing stand in the shower and while standing. It does feel good! Do you have any suggestions on how to get in and out of bed or bend down to pick things up. Please help! I still have some pelvic pain on my right side and it seems to worsen when I get out of bed.

I told my husband that the next child we have, number 4, God willing, will be born in a birthing center with a midwife who understands the natural way of giving birth. I was so disappointed to not have given birth the way I had planned. I wanted so much to feel the empowering feeling that many women speak of when giving birth the natural way, listening to their bodies. I felt only deep frustration, loss of control and sadness to know that I was not supported in my desires of giving birth in the way I knew was best for me.

Those of you who have utering/bladder prolapse, please respond and share your experience and helpful ways of dealing with your prolapse. Thank you and God bless.

mare7395

June 26, 2005 - 2:07pm

Hi Meri3.
You have quite a story to tell. I was on the edge of my seat reading it, waiting for the medical people to do the right thing. I guess they are not trained to accomodate requests such as yours.
If you use a hot washcloth on your breast before nursing, it will help your milk to descend. Something I learned from Adele Davis, in "Let's Have Healthy Children".
You will have good support from the participants on this website, they will give you excellent advice. I wish you the best, I know you will recover.

Christine

June 27, 2005 - 8:23am

Dear Meri,

I read your story last night and then read it again to my husband

aprile

June 27, 2005 - 8:53am

Hi Meri,

Congratulations on the birth of your son! I felt so sad reading about your frustrating attempt to give birth naturally and in the position you felt best for your body. Thank God you found this site and can be supported by women who are in the same place as you. I too suffer from cystocele and slight rectocele and have been using the sea sponge with great success. These sponges were invented for menstrual cycle, but are quite effective to hold up and lift the organs and seem like a more natural pessary. I am not sure if they are effective for uterine prolapse, but certainly worth a shot. I can say with sincerity that they are truly comfortable and you won't even notice you are wearing one if the size is appropriate. By the way, you can trim them to size if it seems too large. They should be carefully washed and rinsed each night, then soaked once a week in hygrogen peroxide/water mix or tea tree oil. They have been a true Godsend to me because all the "checking" was truly driving me crazy! They help with the heavy feeling as well. The posture is a wonderful practice, but not something I can't always master each day...I sometimes forget! The exercises, however are great. But at least the sponges are a way for me to get immediate relief. I don't always need them, only at certain times during my cycle. I wish you well Meri. Christine is right....one day these doctors and nurses should all be held accountable for their actions....my God! Be well, April

meri3

June 27, 2005 - 2:36pm

Hello everyone!
I was happily surprised to find responses to my entry so soon. I am doing o.k today. I am a bit frustrated with how my breastfeeding is coming along and trying to keep older children busy. I have been in bed feeding baby all day, doesn't seem to get satisfied. Am going to continue feeding all day as long as I have to.

Thank you Christine and others for your wonderful encouragement. You made me cry because you understand me. Of course I will participate in the Whole Woman Project. The doctor who delivered my baby was extremely insensitive and cold. The nurses were also unhelpful and one even yelled at me when I was pushing wanting me to breathe her way. The same nurse after the birth had to put clean linens under me and when she asked me to pick up my rear end, I told her I couldn't move. She kept telling me to pick myself up, that I didn't have an epidural and therefore could move myself. I gave in and in great pain picked my rump up. Yes, I do know that a result of this birth I suffered injury. I felt it while on my back. I forgive them all but I still hold them responsible and do not want them to hurt other women. It is horrible how women have to suffer just so doctors can have it easier for themselves in delivery.

One day when I was in the waiting room of the clinic I was being seen at a girl came in with her newborn. I asked her how her delivery was. She told me to be careful with Dr.---- (I don't even remember his name, but can easily find out). He's the same doctor who delivered my baby. She then proceeded to tell me how she was induced two days after her due date, and when she didn't progress in labor was given medication to produce contractions. The baby then became stressed and she had to have an emergency ceserean!

I will watch the dvd when I get a chance, maybe tonight. I am anxious to try the exercises. Thank you all once again for your encouragement. I also believe that I will get better and with God's help fully recover. My husband also has great faith in my healing. We have changed our diets and already feel the benefits plus the added bonus of weight loss!

I have found it easy to walk with my rump out (my husband likes it too!)and have tried to be conscious of my posture. i've battled with bad posture since I was about 10 or 11. I I've found the sitting postures to be the hardest but will continue to practice.

Christine, thank you, thank you, for this website and for all of you who took time out to respond. May all God's blessings be yours!

mare7395

June 27, 2005 - 4:37pm

I think this website is the only sane site where you actually find the truth concerning womens conditions and proper treatment for these conditions. I am constantly touched with Christine's compassion for all of us and that she shares her knowledge continually with us. We are so fortunate to have access to this website, Christine and the people who post. They are all wonderful. ;)

BaNa48

June 27, 2005 - 5:34pm

Hi, I also read your story and was horrified by the way the medical profession treated you! I am 61 y/o and found this site by a miracle I guess after being diagnosed with prolapse! I have days when I get really depressed and think that I might want to have surgery, but then I remember the ones that had it, and how sorry they are! And of course there is no going back! You are so young, I'm sure things will get better for you. The posture and exercises are helping me, and at my age that's just a miracle! I also use the sea sponges. Cheer up and keep at it and I am sure you'll improve. It took me about 2 months to notice the difference after I found this site. I have read about 12 books on the subject and learned quite a bit, but I really think that Christine's book was the one I cherished and reread many times. So far I haven't been able to find her newest one here in Michigan. But I am hoping it'll be available soon. I'm sure we'll all learn more. Take care, Nancy

fullofgrace

July 3, 2005 - 7:25pm

My baby boy nursed every hour for 30-40 minutes for the first four weeks of his life. I had hired help to take care of and pick up after my two girls who were 2 & 4 so I spent all that time lounging in bed with him as much as possible since when they are so small it's hard to sit in a good posture and nurse. If you can get help, do it. His nursing habits were so different from my girls and he is a little chunk now at 8 months. I suppose maybe it's because he is a boy and I suspect it's genetic as my husband was a chunk when he was a baby. At 4 weeks he decided to nurse every two hours and by 8 weeks every three and 12 weeks he was on a four hour schedule. So there is hope. But they are only little for such a short time that I didn't mind the hourly sacrifice. I made myself a promise that I"d stay in my pj's for the first week after birth, so all the photos of me and my baby during that week I'm in my red pj's. My husband said they could get up and walk by themselves, but I didn't care because wearing them signaled I was at rest to me and EVERYONE around me. ;)

I am so sorry for the violation you had during your birth. I never really understood the connection between birth and sexuality until My hospital birth experience turned c/s. I felt so violated, like I had been raped. Many people on ICAN describe their situations in similar terms. My basic human rights and freedoms were denied once I entered the hospital. I felt like a prisoner. I do not know what happens to some people when they enter the medical feild; they become like parent or god-figures and treat their patients like children or subjects. I watched my mother-in-law's sister who is a nurse deny my mother-in-law morphine while she was recovering from knee surgery by purposely placing her drip-clicker thingy (where she could click to receive morphine when she began to feel pain) our of her reach! She kept telling her she didn't need it! HOw did she know?! What gave her that right?! My mil was so angry! and I can't blame her.

I want to encourage you that with my story. By six weeks postpartum when my uterus returned to its normal size my prolapse sensation was less than it was prior to the birth, but more than it was during pregnancy as pregnancy lifted everything up. I had no period due to nursing until he was almost 7 months old and I just had my second cycle. I kept thinking my prolapse sensation was greater, when here it was just the (no clean way to say this) blood I was feeling. I did feel more spongy in that area during my cycle but I beleive that is to be expected. I have had no notable issues with sex; it feels wonderful; only once did rectocele bother me after the fact and that could have been avoided if I would have taken care of my diet better during the few days before.

Let me encourage you to get help and let other people worry about picking up after your kids, there is no housekeeping that needs done during this honeymoon period with your baby that cannot wait until next spring :), relax, give yourself a break, you've experienced a trauma at the hands of the medical staff that betrayed you, talk about it, cry about it, rage about it, grieve for it, then move on stronger and empowered to do what you know you are to do. Take care of yourself and your baby. You deserve it. You've done a miracle feat in carryng that baby for nine months. Give your body that long to recover. Blessings to you, dear sister mother!

Christine

July 4, 2005 - 7:18am

Blessed Be.

JulieJ

July 15, 2005 - 6:20pm

Meri,

Congratulations on your new baby boy! I am so happy for you. But so sorry you had to experience such a violating delivery. :( I am certain too, that if the Lord blesses us with any more children, I will NEVER have another hospital birth! You know what's funny, is I didn't even realize my hospital births were bad until I experienced prolapse and started doing research and realized that birth is supposed to be a natural and beautiful process, NOT a medical procedure! I just thought everybody had the "horror stories" of episiotomies, forceps, pushing on your back for hours, etc. I thought that was just what it took to have a baby. What hogwash we have been fed by the medical establishment!!

I too have cystocele/uterine prolapse. My ob/gyn says my cystocele is actually the main component of it. But it is still relatively mild. I have had SUPER success with Christine's program and lifestyle information. I feel like I owe such a huge debt to her (Love you, Christine!).

Please hang around here, meri, and keep taking care of yourself. We are here for you. Enjoy that precious new, soft, lovely baby. Oh, now I'm thinking about wanting another one again! :)

Julie

Christine

July 17, 2005 - 7:25am

You're so terrific, Julie...I owe you too...I feel we all created this work together!!!

granolamom

July 17, 2005 - 8:00am

I am so glad to hear of women continuing to have babies even with a prolapse. At first I was sure that it meant no more kids for me.
And I can vouch for the awesome nature of birth. My youngest was born at home with a midwife attending. The most wondrous experience of my life.......I hope to do that again someday