38 1/2 weeks and counting......

Body: 

Hi everyone,

Just thought I'd post and give everyone an update. I continue to visit regularly and look for tips on birthing with prolapse and coping postpartum. You've all been wonderful with the advice, and it has given me added confidence. I"m getting increasingly uncomfortable as the days pass. The baby has dropped and now I"m in the bathroom quite frequently. I'm feeling quite bulky "down there". BMs have been okay, but I suffered early in the pregnancy with hemmorhoids, so they are swelling up again (likely because of pelvic pressure). I've got my older child at daycare during the day so I can rest, standing/walking time is very limited now.......Anyway, I guess what I'm seeking is birthing position advice. My first I did naturally. He came very quickly (4 1/2 hours), but I was on my back. I'm worried this one will be faster, and am thinking I will probably end of birthing in my side (I hope). I'm from Canada, and because I made the choice early on to go with an OB, they won't let me switch to a midwife. I had a discussion about birthing positions last time with the OB, she was nice, but basically told me it just depended on which OB was on call with respect to "birthing position". She actually told me it was a lot easier to protect my bottom on my back. I certainly made the point of increased pelvic outlet side when you are not lying on your sacrum, but I don't think they really care! Anyway I have my husband advocating for me, and hopefully I'll be able to remain in control of the situation. We've had tonnes of snowy weather here lately, so who knows, I may be stuck having this baby at home!....Anyway, I will keep you posted on the baby situation......Thanks for all of your support and advice.

I'd say stay off your back during labor. It may be that the dr feels like he's in a optimal position to protect your bottom while you are on your back because that's where he can see/reach the easiest. but the person who is best able to protect your bottom is YOU and YOU are not in an optimal position while on your back.

personally, I'm a fan of hands/knees or standing. sidelying is probably good too, only I can't get comfortable that way in labor. and if you haven't already, read up on the 'no push birth'.

wishing you a healthy rest-of-pg and a wonderful, gentle birth.

keep us posted!

I know it is the last thing you want to hear-but...well it is the reality. You are going to be putting yourself in a position where you (the boss) have to do what your employees say- or else come across as a). confrontational b). crazy as a loon or c). negligent of the health of your baby. They are going to "require" you to be monitored (which means on your back) with a belt that keeps track of your contractions and the baby's heart rate. At the first sign of anything they consider 'abnormal' you will be informed that it is time to start worrying-
your only hope for a delivery where you can protect your pelvic floor is one where you walk in with the baby's head presenting and get up on all fours and in a minute or so birth your baby. No time for them to get invested in the process- to tell you what to do- or fuss at you for doing something they don't like.

Honestly- it may just be simpler if you start accepting now that you are at their mercy and will have no control over the situation.

Or if you are fine with being a PI their A start your research now. Here in my state I can refuse almost every "requirement" during birth just by signing a form. or many forms- I just have to know how to ask for them. by name. I can also walk out at any time if I am not happy with the service- again by signing a form.

I'm sorry to be so darn negative about something so wonderful as the birth of your beautiful baby. I love birth especially when the mom is respected and she runs the show. And of course I love it best when there is no 'show' at all.

Good luck.

I was able to labor in the shower at my hospital. Just because they want to monitor you does not mean you have to labor on your back. I didn't labor in bed for either of my first two births. Write out your birthplan and take it to the hospital with you...be sure the nurses and doctor read it to understand your requests. If you don't get your OB to deliver, you might fall at the mercy of the doc on call, but your hope is that the nurses can advocate for you... or you get a great doctor. I felt in complete control of my births.

proudmama I am so glad you were able to have a good birth in the hospital. I have many friends who enjoyed the after birth part in the hospital (meals and help in the bathroom and such) but not many that felt the birth went the way they dreamed it would. It is tricky. Each woman has her own set of expectations and there is great variation among them. I have no desire to share my intimate moments of birth with anyone. I want to be left alone. Many women love the support of other people in their labors- and enjoy the attentiveness of hospital staff. It is when the nurses and doctors insist that a woman birth one way or the other that I get frustrated.
No one is at the mercy of the on call doctor. We hire them. They are at our mercy.
I have had hospital experiences (ICU with dd) that were simply wonderful. The nurses were fantastic. The care was amazing. But I still had to refuse many services and defend my choices-(like not to have my 2 year old catheterized for a respiratory infection). Most interventions during birth are unnecessary. Most nurses have not seen half as many natural births as they have cesarian sections.
It is a sad fact.
I am glad you suggested a birth plan. That may be of great help. If it does not interfere with hospital policy that is.
Has anyone here watched "the business of being born" or "orgasmic birth"?
both are great movies to watch before having a baby.

depending on the hospital, your birth plan might not be worth the paper its written on. I learned that the hard way, some hospitals have policies that they will not, under any circumstances, change just because you would like them too. well, I guess technically, you could refuse treatment. all, if not most, hospitals do pay lip service to the 'patients bill of rights' but when push comes to shove, not many women are in a good position to advocate for themselves while in labor.
I tried to get to the hospital as late as possible with my two hospital births. with the first, I got there already in transition and they still had time to: do an internal fetal monitor
administer an epidural even though I said I didn't want one
administer a pitocin drip
catheterize me
not notice my tears
whisk dd off to the nicu because I was strep b pos and didn't have time for an antibiotic drip
give dd a bottle in the nicu even though I told everyone (and wrote it on the card on her isolette) that she was BREAST ONLY
and the maternity care was crap too.
all this in a major teaching hospital in NYC where my dr was highly respected.

but I didn't know enough and trusted them to have my best interests in mind.
now, a friend of mine recently had a baby, long story short when she got to the hospital she was told she'd need a c/s and she said 'oh no. you don't understand. I don't do c-sections' and she had her baby naturally.
my sisters last birth was similar. even in the hospital, she managed to get her laboring self off the bed and into a supported standing birthing position. when the dr told her to get back into bed, she said 'there's no time, just catch the baby' and he did.

so yes, beware of hospitals. but if you can empower yourself and rehearse some fierce-mama lines, maybe you can still be in charge. I'm rooting for ya.

just a question...how do you feel about a home birth?
and if you are okay with teh idea, what happens if you say you can't make it in?

in theory in the UK if you refuse to come in they'll have to send someone to you.
and, if you can't make it in, you birth at home. friend didn't want a home birth, but the midwives do come check on you in labour at home. they came and said "you aren't going to make it to hospital" and she had her baby at home

if you are in the hospital, what about bringing your own stuff to help--bean bag, lots of pillows, birthing ball
and use all that for as long as possible.
they can monitor you standing up, leaning against the bed (yes, the wires do stretch)
they can monitor you by hand
do they have a birthing pool? you could insist on that if they do (can't be on your back then...)
i'd personally try everything

i agree you may have no choice, but you can try...you can also be on all fours on those little tables

and at the very least, stay upright as long as possible...stay at home as long as possible
and don't be afraid of what is to come, as that will slow you down / stop things, and then the problems start.
whatever happens, you and your beautiful baby will be together very very soon...

Probably will be really fast if your first was so fast. Envision what you want and call it all into being. Mother's intuition is highly developed in weeks prior to birth. Any chance you can bring a "doula"? Wish I'd had one for first birth (in hosp.), in retrospect. You've done it before, so you know what it's all about. Wishing you all the best.

~Amanda
i had a birthing plan and i doubt my dr. or any nurse even glanced at it..but that was just my experience....if i ever decide to have another baby im having a home birth with a midwife for sure.