Does it get better (emotionally)?

welcome to the site and congrats on the new baby. sorry you have to deal with this postpartum, when you're acclimating to motherhood and all the last thing you need is this.

but here are some truths about prolapse:
-it is not life threatening. this is not an emergency.
-you can learn all you need to know about management of Pelvic Organ Prolapse and care for it without medical intervention (though its always a good idea to be looked at by an health care practitioner, to make sure that's what it is)
-Prolapse, no matter how small, can be emotionally/psychologically traumatic. this is a loss, and loss often comes with grief. and there are well documented stages of grief and its worst in the beginning. I think the last stage (if I remember correctly) is acceptance, and by the time you get there life is good again. maybe with a new normal and maybe back to the old normal, but either way, life can be good again. as good as before.

now, no one here can promise you that this will go away. but many of us have seen remarkable improvement by staying in the posture and making some lifestyle changes. nothing tremendous, I mean like eating better, avoiding constipation, avoiding restrictive clothing, etc. there have been runners here, maybe they will chime in.

you are still very early on postpartum-wise. the '6 week' thing is a myth, it takes longer, much longer, for your body to find its way back to a pre-pg state. lots of healing will continue to take place for at least a year. that said, I'd recommend that you get proactive about this to help maximize the healing potential there. if you can afford it, get the book, saving the wholewoman, but be sure to get the second edition. or the dvd, first aid for prolapse. read up on the faqs here and learn the posture. eat well. avoid constipation like the plague. never ever strain on the toilet. make sure to fully empty your bladder daily (a prolapse can change the angle between bladder/urethra and make it difficult to fully empty and that can lead to a uti). and the hardest of them all, take a deep breath and know that many of us were where you are and are doing so much better now. the early days are the most frightening, I think, especially because its likely you don't know anyone who's been through this. so stick around here, we've been through it.

{{{{hugs}}}}

Hi Mzimm

Granolamom is spot-on with her comments. I would only like to add that having a look when you are so newly postpartum is often a very bad idea. It is like looking at a family member who is in hospital after a car accident. Very traumatic!! You know that they look like a completely different, and very ugly person, with swelling, bruising and sutured cuts. In 12 months they will look at last human and almost normal again.

Your vulva and vagina will look very different in a few months time, and will feel very different in two years time. Maybe perfect, maybe not. There has been an enormous amount of stretching going on down there and the tissues will literally take over 12 months to revert as much as they are going to. Sometimes, ignorance is bliss. If you do nothing at all, it will still look better in 12 months.

Follow Granolamom's suggestions and you will give your body the best chance possibile to normalise. Looking regularly can be really soul-destroying. We call it 'checkerama'. It is a very common for women to become a bit obsessive about checking. It will only upset you, and will do nothing to make it get better sooner. Your body has done an amazing thing. Just let it heal before assuming you are going to have POP for ever, and that your former life is over. Progress will be so slow that looking any more than once a month is probably quite pointless. That's just how it happens.

I had a similar birth experience first time around, and almost perfect, active, natural births for the other two babies. I did have some symptoms after the first but never a formal diagnosis, cos there was no question of my needing surgical repairs at that stage. My POP's were worsened by marriage stress and subsequent constipation, which started about ten years ago and went for another five years. That is resolved now, and my POP's feel better now than I have for many years. You see, I am no longer worried about disappearing down my own plughole because I know what is happening (menopause too) and I have come to trust my body a lot better, and have lost the fear I once had.

Hang in there, and put the mirror in a hard-to-reach cupboard for now.

Cheers

Louise

Somehow granolamom always knows just the right things to say . . . welcome and know that I and many others have been in your shoes. What my cystocele looked like at 5 weeks pp is nothing like it looks now at 8 months pp (on the rare occasions I actually see it) and I'm assured by others that there will be improvements on until 2 years pp. It really does get better, physically and emotionally, although there are ups and downs along the way. Just be warned, it's like watching an ice cube melt in a refrigerator when you try to monitor progress. Then one day, you realize that things are much better and you forgot to notice. Also, it seems to be the trend that most women feel their worst with this around 3 months pp, and then start to have leaps in healing. Really try to shake that anxiety by knowing that how you are now does not indicate how you will be in a year. It's hard, don't I know it, but for me, writing down all the positive phrases of healing here to refer to offline helped me calm the anxiety.

I also advise getting the DVD -- Christine is so calm and positive that it is an instant lift to the spirits. Oh, and great tips and exercise, too. Start the posture -- it really, really does help. And read as many old posts here as you can. Get checked by one, of course, but you will learn much, much more about this here than any doctor can provide.

best wishes

Mzimm, I think I would be happy to have your doctor. :-)

It will get better. It must.
Going through the mourning process as Granolamom said and arriving to your own healing place is crucial though.
I am on my way too, you are not alone!
hugs
Liv

blissedout

Hi
just quickly read your message - I fully empathise with your experience re anxiety. I believe we experience this because it is such a deep part of one's femininity which overnight has changed.( you feel like a different person?)

For now i can't write much as in a library with time running out but i would say that intuitively i feel that as you are so young and obviously fit re running you will manage to restore your pelvic area with exercise and general fitness methods. I TRULY understand your sense of anxiety - I had surgery 4months ago for rectocele and have been very myopic since with all else falling into the background - these things go very deep and I don't feel that the medical profession understand the effect on a woman's psyche.( mine is taking ages to heal and feel this sense of loss you describe too!)

Please try to maintain hope and positive thinking as I am sure your youth will see you through - I am a young 63!! and didn't manage through exercise but really wish that i had persevered (as you will!)

Must stop now

Love to you and your baby

Elspeth