Just saying thanks ... and listen!


It's been almost two years since I wrote my first desperate appeal for help to this forum. I had developed a rectocele, and the main symptom was being unable to completely empty my bladder.

I always felt like I had to go, and my nights were long journeys of misery as I sat on the toilet trying - and failing - to urinate. I often fell asleep there, only to wake and begin concentrating, focusing, trying to relax etc. - all to no avail. I felt I would live the rest of my life in this state; felt that my last fully comfortable moment had come and gone and I hadn't even realized it. I went to my doctor and she sent me to a urologist who, after some extremely uncomfortable procedures gave me my diagnosis - I wasn't completely emptying my bladder! Hello! Do the words presenting symptom mean anything? They gave me an ultrasound and diagnosed me with a rectocele. They told me I should have surgery to strengthen my pelvic floor. I went online to research this surgery and the marvel that is Google sent me here. I went on to the forum, described my problem and asked for help. Two years later - without surgery - my life is 99.5 percent back to normal. I follow the positioning advice I was given - leaning far forward works for me, as does standing up and doing a little hip shimmy. Also as per someone's advice I began taking a stool softener because it is true that when I am constipated for whatever reason things are much worse. The original poster said she called Miralax "Miraclelax" and I agree. Now 90% of the time I can fully empty my bladder, even if it does take some contortions in the bathroom. I even got a doctor's statement that if I am drug tested (always a possibility in my job) I can put a bowl in the toilet because leaning over and around to hold that little vial there completely closes off the passage. And when those nights come - they do come on occasion, and I note in my journal "bad night for pee" - I no longer despair. I lean forward, I stand up, I walk around, I sit back down and if that doesn't work I go back to bed, arrange myself as comfortably as possible and go to sleep, secure in the knowledge that next time it probably will work and for every "bad night for pee" there are 60 perfectly normal nights. So thank you from the bottom of my heart, Whole Woman, and if you are new here, please don't despair. Listen to (or read) all the advice, try it all and you will find what works for you. I just ordered the new yoga DVD because it was yoga that did this to me in the first place. Complicating factors are no doubt menopause and weight, but it was after a full yoga course that the symptoms appeared. So now yoga will help heal me, and I have absolute faith in Christine's version. Can't wait to start it! Media mail, come on!

Loved reading your post! A great success story, and one of many. I too am grateful that fate and search engines led me to this site in the spring of 2010. Not sure where I'd be otherwise. I am so grateful to Christine and all the wonderful people who share their stories here. So important for everyone to hear from women like you. Thanks so much!