Encouragement, feedback, suggestions welcome

Submitted by Bonne Maman on March 10, 2013 - 9:32am
Body: 

Hi all,

so here is what is happening with my stage two cystocele at 6.5 months pp:

I stopped going to the pelvic floor physio. She had a big poster on her wall showing the pelvic organs resting directly over the pelvic floor muscles and maintained that kegels were the only way to manage prolapse. Every time I left her office I felt frustrated and negative so I figured that was a bad sign.

I have been doing the First Aid dvd almost every day, and practicing the posture every time I remember. Even so, I figure I am probably only maintaining the posture about 20% of the time - old habits are hard to break! But it is getting easier. Also maintaining the posture while lifting.

On a good day, I don't feel bulgy until the evening and pass urine normally. On a bad day, urine stream is slow, leaking urine irritates my vagina, and I feel bulgy ALL DAY. Good days and bad days seem to be about equal these days.

I'm trying not to focus too much on whether or not this will improve, although obviously I hope that it will. I know that discovering this posture is huge for me, and if I had to prolapse to get to it then that's the way things go. Basically I get scared when I think about the future: will this just get worse as I age? will this interfere with being able to parent an active child? But sometimes it even sucks in the present too, when I feel bulgy and irritated and alone with the baby all day.

Thanks for listening.

Forum:

Surviving60

March 10, 2013 - 9:45am

Hi maman - the first order of business is to get that 20% up closer to 100%. Correcting your posture permanently and for all time, is what this is all about. I was into my second year before I reached the point where the posture was second nature. When that happens, you might find yourself viewing the future in a whole new light. Aside from that, your good days and bad days sound like they are following a pretty normal pattern especially for someone at your early stage of learning posture. - Surviving

Bonne Maman

March 10, 2013 - 9:58am

Thanks Surviving,
yes I am always trying to remember to correct my posture. That's something good about the cystocele, it's a constant reminder! It's amazing, sometimes I wake up from sleeping with a tight stomach, I must be holding in my belly even at night. Well I guess I spent probably 25+ years standing the wrong way, so I won't be able to change it right away. Would you say that the good days and bad days are related to how well I keep the posture? Has that been your experience?

Surviving60

March 10, 2013 - 3:55pm

There are always variables no matter how well we stay in posture during the day, no matter how long it has been since we reached that tipping point where posture became automatic. For example, I still like to slouch in bed for a period each night. I know it's not good but I do it anyway. I don't always put something behind my lower back when I drive. I know I should, but sometimes I just don't. No matter what we do, we could always be doing better. And we will always be tired at the end of the day, and possibly bulgy as well. BUT, yes, as time continues to pass with me in WW posture, my bad days continue to be less and less bad. This is why I do not fear the future. I now understand that this works, I no longer have to take the word of others. Whatever kind of day I'm having, more bulgy or less so, either way I'm not stressing about it. That's freedom! - Surviving

PS: There was a post just the other day from a member who said she did the WW workout every day, but did not do the posture as she went about her day. I wondered, is she even in posture WHILE she's doing the workout? Bonne Maman, can we at least conclude that you do the exercises in excellent WW posture? Because anything less doesn't even count as WW exercise.

Bonne Maman

March 18, 2013 - 7:24pm

Thanks Surviving. I have to say that I still have fears for the future. I have come to accept that it is the WW work, and not conventional physio, that feels right for my body, but there is still the nagging voice that says "What if you're wrong?". And being in my thirties and prolapsed, I wonder if it will just keep getting worse and worse - because I intend to live for a very long time :)
The posture is my main focus. With a young babe, it's pretty hard to be consistent with the exercises, but at least I can always focus on the posture, no matter what I am doing. I really "got" the main principles right away, but I am always deepening into it and figuring out the dynamics more and more. Also as my muscles strengthen and realign everything changes as well. Lifting in the posture is my main challenge. I have been lifting the wrong way (with my back muscles) for so long that my thigh muscles are weak, so I really have to discipline myself to keep the posture and let my legs do the work. Also, my shoulder girdle is so tight from years of hunching that it kills to let my shoulders fully drop down. Lots of work to do there. But when I really think about it, having a prolapse is the only way that I would have done this postural work. I am sure I have saved myself some serious chronic pain issues down the road by making these corrections now. Now that I know the right way to stand, I realize how horrendous my posture really was! That's why I wonder if my prolapse has been brewing for years as I tucked in my tailbone and sucked in my tummy, or if it was just the product of a quick and forceful labour? I guess I will never know, and it doesn't really matter anyways.

alemama

March 19, 2013 - 3:45pm

Bonne Maman,
My most educated guess about the future is that it will not get worse. So far I've been dealing with prolapse since the birth of my second child 8 years ago (didn't have a name for it until the third birth 6 years ago) and things have not gotten worse over the long term and in fact, things are even better now 6 years later than any other time over the last 6 years.
The thing with this prolapse nonsense is that it does go up and down depending on a variety of factors right? If you are constipated and push and push, you can expect to see your prolapse get worse. I know once early on I went camping and things were worse. You can lift something heavy just the wrong way and have a setback and sometimes, you have a set back for seemingly no reason at all. But if you look at progress as a whole- you will see a trend in either a stabilizing direction- or in some cases, even improvement!
Now, my opinion is based on the reading I've done here over the last 6 years and my own body- so information given by women who practice whole woman posture and lifestyle as well as they can. I can assume that Doctors will say it can only get worse based on their experience. They see women who have been told the only help is kegals (which we know here most women report that excessive kegals usually make things worse). So I guess it's really who you ask right?
I figure the *what ifs* can wait and see. The only other option is surgery and it really doesn't matter if you are droopier before you have the surgery- the outcomes are the same no matter the degree of prolapse they are attempting to treat.
The *why did this happen* question is an interesting one. I've decided it happens because some degree of prolapse is actually a good thing- a healthy thing- a necessary thing. Kinda like wrinkles or saggy boobs- it's the body's way of adapting to change and adaptations are good! It happens because the body is made to stretch to accommodate a growing baby- and stretch again to birth that baby. But, I understand when your cervix is hanging out of your body or when you have constant UTIs because you are not emptying your bladder well- then there is a big problem. That's ok. These issues can be addressed with Wholewoman!
The thing is, you are young! You have time- decades even! Take your time- come into this posture- come out of those baby years and come into your self a little more. This is just one season of your life and you might find that in 10 years, you think about prolapse once in a while, not in the everyday way you are living with now :)

kiko

March 20, 2013 - 7:21pm

Hi Bonne,

Just wanted to chime in to say I know where you're at. My second child is almost seven months old and I can honestly say my POP is feeling pretty bad at the moment, possibly worse than ever. I know a lot of it is to do with being run off my feet and lack of sleep.

I'm confident though that it will get better as the chaos settles down and I find my groove.

Bonne Maman

March 22, 2013 - 6:21pm

When was your baby born??? My daughter is almost 7 mo as well - August 26th. Thanks for the solidarity :) Actually lately it feels like I have been having more good days than bad, but every time I have a bad day it feels like starting all over again. I hear you with the lack of sleep, together with that and breastfeeding no wonder our bodies are slow to heal. But we will I know, thanks for your optimism.

Bonne Maman

March 22, 2013 - 6:23pm

Thanks so much. I'm almost past the WTF?! stage, but sometimes if I have a bad day it's easy to fall back into the pit of despair. That's when your words are so precious. Thank you!

kiko

March 23, 2013 - 1:16am

My son was born on August 23rd. So that makes him seven months old today. It's gone waaay too fast!

Glad to hear the good days outnumber the bad, at least.

kiko

March 23, 2013 - 1:20am

I'm 33, which I think is around about your age, Bonne. So we really are on a similar page in two ways.

Bonne Maman

March 23, 2013 - 10:04pm

Yep, same on both counts - I'll be 34 in April. You don't live in Vancouver, BC, by chance, do you?

kiko

March 25, 2013 - 4:41am

Nope, because three coincidences would be far tooo freaky! I'm in Melbourne, Australia.