Am I the only one?

Dear Mommynow,

I’m so sorry to hear you still struggling. I expect through the years we will have some percentage of women throw in the towel and have surgery. That being the case, I hope those same women will keep in touch and tell us of their experiences.

Let’s put things in perspective a bit for our other readers, though. Correct me if I’m wrong, but I believe you’ve seen a lot of improvement with the cystocele, right? It’s the rectocele that seems to be so hard to reduce.

I hope some of the other women will jump in to confirm this, but we’ve heard over and over again something like, “My symptoms are so much improved with the posture and lifestyle changes. Only my rectocele acts up now and then, but usually when I’m not watching my diet.” Granolamom has struggled like you, but really started to see some improvement in recent months.

I know you’ve been really trying to adhere to a good diet and I hear your frustration.

Have you tried the firebreathing?

The problem with posterior colporrhaphy is that your vagina will be surgically narrowed to push the bulge back, but the prolapsed anterior rectal wall will still be there. Sooner or later for many women a new, and usually more troublesome, bulge will appear higher or lower than the original prolapse. What now? You are left with less than you started with and the core of the problem – the bulging rectum – remains.

I still have my ups and downs, but I always know a good walk, a couple of hours in my studio and a few rounds of firebreaths will help tremendously. But if you haven’t experienced any improvement in the rectocele as a baseline, though, I don’t know what to suggest. We do know these things take time, but I also know there are limits. Hopefully others will have some supportive words.

Hugs, (((Mommynow)))

Christine

Hi Mommynow! Just wanted to offer you some sympathy - sorry to hear you're feeling sad. I've only been doing the posture for a couple weeks, and haven't had any improvement yet, but I'm keeping my hopes up. Have you tried, or are you able to try, physical therapy, or maybe a pessary? Maybe a different Dr. would be more helpful. I agree with your not wanting surgery, especially at such a young age, so the best you can do is keep educated and try every other option. Also, just a thought, but perhaps things will get better when you are done with nursing your daughter - I'm certainly no expert, but maybe a shift in hormones could make a difference. You should be really proud of the work you've done for the past 8 months, on top of taking such good care of your baby! Just doing it for a couple weeks has kicked my butt - lol - but I'm going to keep trying. I just wanted to wish you the best, and if you ever need to vent, I'm here for you - it's so easy to feel all alone in this. Take care, and let us know. Glor

Please don't apologize for the depressing post - that's one reason why the forum is here! I can only imagine how frustrated you feel with a young baby and prolapse issues - it's is exhausting emotionally as well as physically. If you're in a fragile state of mind right now, you might want to give yourself a bit more time before making a decision about surgery. When your doctor said you needed a hysterectomy, did he/she discuss options like using a pessary? If not, you might want to bring it up, or see if you can find a gyn. who will work with you on that. A pessary could provide enough relief from your symptoms, at least temporarily, to help you get your mind around all of this. You said that you have not been specifically diagnosed, so it might be a good idea to see someone else to get another perspective on your situation. You also said that you can't imagine dealing with this for the rest of your life, but remember that the consequences of surgery are also lifelong. Although it will probably always be hard work, managing your prolapse might not always be the struggle it is for you today. I hope that you will give it a little more time.
Please stay in touch with the forum.
All best wishes,

J.

Mommynow, and all the rest of us that at times get discouraged, you are very much in my thoughts because I--as well as many others reading this--can relate to some degree to what you are saying. My sense of frustration at times isn't nearly as deep as yours, though. You are a very busy mother of at least one precious little one! There must be many things you do throughout the day in caring for this marvelous little person that could possibly make a difference in what is happening in your body. We mothers do what we have to without giving extra thought to ourselves. I am well beyond little ones of my own and live too far away from my grandchildren to experience that level of activity anymore--though I'd give anything to be there with them! Love yourself, care for yourself while you are caring for your family. Relax when you can. Maybe this will help. On a practical note I have noticed that what shoes I'm wearing can make a huge difference in whether or not I feel my bulges! For me, my Teva Kinetic Circuits quickly bring me relief after wearing dress shoes for work. Just a thought. In the meantime motherhood is great--and it is much easier to see this once they are grown and I don't have to be constantly alert because of little ones around!

you are not the only one. It took a long while before I started to see real results. It was frustrating when I'd read about women who joined this site after me reporting positive change soon after they started. while I was really happy for them I started to get down on myself, what was I doing wrong? why couldn't I heal myself more quickly? would I ever be among them or would I be the 'one that Christine just couldn't help'? I figured I'd best stick with the program since I had no better alternative and I was feeling better emotionally and eating better and caring for myself in a more wholesome way. so that's worth something too.

thank God I did eventually see tremendous change once I started the firebreathing. I think that all along small internal changes were probably taking place; ones I could not see or perceive but ones that were leading up to the success of the WWFB. the prolapse didn't happen overnight - and even if it did pop up over night the scenario which allowed it to pop up took years in the making. so you have to undo all of that. and you are still in that year post partum. it really does take a while for your body to get back to a new normal, hormonally, posturally, everything.

regarding the rectocele: I too am 'regular' and I definitely notice a difference when I eat meat. I am still regular but my gut feels heavier and more sluggish and the rectocele more pronounced. eliminating dairy helped me tremendously as well.

don't give up just yet - we're all cheering you on. and feel free to post any time you're feeling down. that's what we're here for.

Dear Mommynow,

Just wanted to send you my thoughts and hugs to try to cheer you up a bit. We joined here about the same time you and I so I feel your lowness with you. Please try to do something nice for yourself, and be gentle with yourself too, and I am sending you positive thoughts. I wish I could do more! Take care.

Love Michelle.xxx

Mommynow, I so want things to improve for you! Would you be interested in letting us help you trouble-shoot your diet? It may be there is rectal pressure and ballooning that could be ameliorated with a change in your food. There's only so much meddling I can do, but I remember your comment about trail mix and thinking to myself "if I ate packaged trail mix my gut would be toxic for days!"

How about this...why don't you make a record of everything you eat for the next three days? Then maybe we can make a few suggestions that may be of help. If it's a hassle don't bother. I just can't stand it that you're not improving and it would be wonderful if we could figure out why.

Hugs,

Christine

Hi Mommynow

How frustrating for you. I am wondering what happens when you are in water, ie swimming, deep bath, spa or hot tub? I find that my uterus and bladder just rise up to where they belong. I guess it is the weightlessness. The other position where my uterus and bladder move back to normal is lying on your stomach. Check where they are when you are in this position as well.

What I am getting at is to make sure that they *can* move back to their non-prolapsed positions and that there is not something else happening that is stopping them from moving back into their non-prolapsed position.

Cheers

Louise

Well, that's good news in a way. At least you know that all your pelvic contents can resume their previous positions. It would be a worry if they could not. It is not a nice feeling getting out and feeling them bowing to gravity, though, is it? And, it's is not easy to get out of a pool in posture, unless you can walk up some steps!

But what then?? Quadruped for the rest of your life? I don't think so. There are some things even I find unacceptable!

I really hope you can make some progress with diet though. You might get a surprise. It is just as Christine says. Posture won't cure prolapse, simply help us to live more comfortably with it.

cheers

Louise