Devastated - fistula/fecal material in vagina

Submitted by BeingHuman on March 26, 2015 - 4:21pm
Body: 

Ladies of WW, I had been so hopeful in my last week of discovering POP symptoms and finding this supportive community.

Today after a bowel movement (all liquid diarrhea - it's like I'm peeing out of my butt - pardon the graphic image - but that's all I've managed to do for the past 3 weeks due to a rectal prolapse or intuss, haven't figured out which yet) -

but after the BM I had a bright red blood clot with white mucous come from my vagina.

And then when I inserted a finger to my vagina, I could feel a bump much lower than usual (I'd never felt anything there before) - and when my finger came out, lo and behold, there were tiny brown flecks, almost looked like grains of sand from the beach - that matched the color and texture of my liquid poo.

I nearly cried.

I haven't had children so don't understand how a fistula could develop. When I think back, I have had 2 ulcers on my vaginal/perineal area in the past 6 months that might be a co-symptom that adds up to a bigger picture. And in a recent CT scan from the emergency room last week, the radiologist remarked that I had a lot of air in my vagina.

But I am just so so devastated about this - and not sure if it's life threatening and urgent to seek care now. I have a urogyn appointment on Monday and then two colorectal surgeons in 2 weeks. Should I try to get an earlier appointment? How should I clean my vagina to avoid infection??

I knew this journey would be two steps forward, one step back but this is a majorly upsetting setback and I'm feeling very lost at sea...

*sob*

Forum:

lifegoeson04

March 26, 2015 - 5:08pm

i have no experience in this but just wanted to say I thinking of you, please try to stay positive and not to down. I thought that if this happened you would be able to feel the actual tear in the wall but maybe I am wrong. I don't want to sound patronising as I really don't know. I assume you were pretty sure it's leaking into your vagina. Hopefully someone with more experience will come along. I just wanted to say I am so so sorry this is happening to you and sending hugs your way

BeingHuman

March 26, 2015 - 5:21pm

thanks @lifegoeson... sometimes it's good just to hear someone care. that hug helped.

Christine

March 26, 2015 - 5:23pm

Godspeed, dear BH...you need help with your condition...stat. Hugs!

Aussie Soul Sister

March 26, 2015 - 5:34pm

(((BeingHuman))) sending best wishes to you xx

Aussie Soul Sister

mom30

March 26, 2015 - 6:12pm

Go to the er, at least you won't have to wait to see what's going on in there. ((((hugs to you))))

Pack Momma

March 26, 2015 - 6:33pm

Don't wait for appointment get to the ER!!! Prayers and well wishes are with you. Don't take any chances.

BeingHuman

March 27, 2015 - 1:38am

Thank you ladies for the advice but I probably jumped the gun...
I examined my vagina again and I think it's not fecal material but.. old blood...

I think today is the first day I felt my cervix come down in my vagina. In other words, it's the first time I've ever felt a protrusion in my vagina. Until tonight I thought I only had rectal issues.

This brings me to the FULL SQUAT vs HALF SQUAT dilemma.

The predicament: a full squat is the best way for me to get a bowel movement out.

The flaw: full squat puts a lot of pressure on my vagina

Today was the last straw. As I forced out a BM in full squat mode (balancing both feet on toilet seat) I felt a lot of pressure in vagina and when I wiped that's when I noticed the blood clot from vagina, which from my research (i.e. Googling) is likely from an irritated cervix.

And then I felt inside and could push up a soft spongy thing which I assume is the cervix/uterus.

And now there are remnants of brown/old blood.

Pretty sure that is the more likely explanation vs a fistula... I will still have my test on Saturday to confirm but wanted to update y'all and thank you for the concern even though I self-diagnosed a bit quickly.

Also stuck on how I should poo if my full squats are making it worse. My poop has to travel through a lot of twists and turns and the full squat seems to be the only thing that has enough high-pressure force to get it out!

Miss Diagnosed

March 27, 2015 - 2:12am

https://wholewoman.com/forum/node/2981

So this is the first time I've tried posting a link - hope it works. Here is the ww approved posture. I was squatting before but after reading in here adopted the 'lopo' posture and am finding it helpful. Your body sounds very vulnerable right now and you need to protect your organs as much as possible. I hope today is a better day - take care of yourself - you are having such a horrible time and I really hope you get some relief and answers soon. X

ActiveandLapsed

March 27, 2015 - 2:39pm

Hi, that's a great link Miss Diagnosed has posted.

I imagine it will be messy if it's liquid to adopt the LoPo position. You could always be just off the toilet seat and experiment working up to this or perhaps in the bath. I imagine being on all fours might work. If you feel you have to squat try to keep on your toes or close to it and have the relaxed belly with your organs forward. I tend towards constipation so it is quite different but we all want the organs forward in our relaxed belly.

Yes that is your cervix as I feel that too.

My thoughts and best wishes to you at during this horrid time for you.

ActiveandLapsed

March 27, 2015 - 2:51pm

Hi again,
Being Human. Sorry just thinking about my cervix comment. That should read - my cervix feels like you describe when I bend over and pop a finger in my vagina I can feel it. I am not diagnosing :o)

wholewomanUK

March 27, 2015 - 4:09pm

Hi Being Human,
Thank heavens it doesn't sound like anything more serious. Phew - it's a roller coaster sometimes!

Re deep squats: My experience with a uterine/cervix prolapse is that deep squares always makes the prolapse worse. I'm a yoga practitioner and I now never do deep squares unless I have to for some reason.

I'm a bit confused. If you're poo is loose, then it's probably coming out quite easily and you don't need to strain. I would think leaning forwards in a standing half squat sort of way with the weight on your feet and things touching the seat - would be fine. I sometimes sit in WW position on the loo to allow gravity to do some of the work and then lean forwards when the evacuation is happening. Sometimes I'm up and down. Sometime I realise it's not going to come out right then and leave it to another time. Sometimes I just take my time and sometimes I just needed to slow down and give my body time to have a poo.

Basically with pop, there are some things that can make things worse and some things that can make things better. In WW, we do less of the former and more of the latter. Squats are one of the former.

I suggest you get some resources asap to learn the knowledge and practice the posture and exercises and guidelines which will lead you onto the path of recovery.

Good luck. More hugs,
wholewomanukx

ActiveandLapsed

March 27, 2015 - 5:51pm

That was a great post re poo. Goodness never thought I would be writing that in my pre POP life. I also do the same thing. I find sitting in WW posture on the seat and then lifting into LoPo position is good but only when things are just ready to come out. I also have to wait until it definitely ready but then as mentioned I tend towards things not being soft enough. I am improving all the time with doing less of what doesn't work.

I enjoy your posts WWUK

Snapcracklepop

March 27, 2015 - 8:54pm

wholewomanUK,

I used to do deep squats with my feet flat on the ground. Now I've been doing them staying on my toes with my toes turned out, but going pretty deep still. Should I be stopping at 90 degrees or so? I always focus on relaxing my lower belly as much as I can, but maybe that's still not enough room?

Interested to hear your feedback when you get a chance.

Snapcracklepop

Aussie Soul Sister

March 28, 2015 - 4:26am

Dear Snapcracklepop,
WW yoga 1st Wheel has 2 poses that are deep squats.

I would recommend watching the DVD for accuracy before doing these poses.

I am describing them to show the difference between whole woman and traditional poses.

One called parallel squat is done up on toes with feet & knees parallel (together) and arms overhead with hands together as in prayer, lumbar curve in place.

The other one is with feet apart a few inches, fully turned out, and hip & knee turn out as far as possible, up on toes and holding the baton overhead.

I have only seen Christine's squats done on the toes.

With conventional yoga, doing squats with flat feet straightens the lumbar curve and places weight on the heels.

I found that doing the hips DVD has given me more balance/ flexibility and strength necessary to do this and other DVDs more easily.

Have fun,
Aussie Soul Sister

Thriving 70s

March 28, 2015 - 10:09am

by "hips DVD, do you mean The First Wheel?

Aging gracefully

March 28, 2015 - 11:49am

The hips dvd is different. It is called "Save Your Hips".

Aussie Soul Sister

March 28, 2015 - 3:51pm

Thriving 70, the First Wheel DVD does target the lower body, as does the Save Your Hips DVD.

The Save Your Hips DVD does more intense exercises, with more repetition, that are very similar, however done with more support like in a chair, on a box and on a mat.

It is more a rehabilitative approach for people with hip dysfunction, however I recommend it for everyone as with modern living, we are often lacking balance, foot arch strength and even weight bearing on both sides, often one side of the body tighter than the other. Just to name a few issues to benefit from.

I love the first wheel DVD also and have done it many times, though use the Save Your Hips DVD as a foundation - I had obvious hip dysfunction.

Aussie Soul Sister

Snapcracklepop

March 28, 2015 - 3:53pm

Thanks for the feedback Aussie Soul Sister. I have the First Wheel and will be checking it out tonight!

BeingHuman

March 28, 2015 - 5:45pm

Thanks ladies for the all the tips.

Quick question - as I'm going to check out the WW squats - you are recommending these as positions for poo'ing correct? Not just squats alone. I am looking for positions to help me pass BM's successfully. I have to do full squat to get liquid BMs out - I know it doesn't sound right, but my colon/bowels have a lot of twisty turns and they don't just "fall out of me" with gravity in lopo position, they need an amount of force or more forceful gravity, hence the squat. But the full squat aggravates everything in my vagina so I'm exploring these half squats to see if they help without straining everything else. Thanks as always for more resources to consider as I figure out what works for my body and my convoluted colon!

Thriving 70s

March 28, 2015 - 6:12pm

Hi, Aussie Soul Sister,
I didn't get the hips dvd because I wasn't have hip problems. My main problem is prolapse Do you think the hips DVD helps with that? Also, in the Goddess Belly, there is jumping. That feels quite awkward to me with my prolapse....I was surprised to see it in the workout. What do you (or others) think about that? Thanks.

Aging gracefully

March 28, 2015 - 6:26pm

Personally, I didn't start any of the jumping until I was much more comfortable with the posture and how my prolapse was feeling in general. Christine first started talking about jumping before she created Destination: Prolapse Free on line course where it first appears. I have noticed that since then she has included it in the goddess belly.

My suggestion is to do it when you are feeling confident and comfortable with how your body is feeling and more importantly how your prolapse feels.
I was well into my second year of this work when Christine introduced the jumping. I did try it and found it beneficial. I don't do a full jump, but more of a bouncing up and down on toe with knees bent. It really forces my uterus into proper position into lower belly, very much like the jiggling does. My big boobs bounce too much if I try any more than that. Something I need to work out on my own.

So, jump when you feel it is right for you.

Surviving60

March 28, 2015 - 6:29pm

I agree with AG about the jumping. It is an advanced move. You have to be in really really good WW posture when you do it; if you are, it has the potential to throw your organs forward into the lower belly. I didn't have the nerve to try it for a long time, but when I did, I was surprised. I do little bounces on toes, alternating with running in place on toes. Wait until you are really "feeling" the posture before trying this. - Surviving