Emotional breakdown from rectocele

Body: 

I am really struggling right now. I was diagnosed with a rectocele last week after my gyno told me I was too young to have one. I demanded she look again and she said it looked like I did. I am 9 months post partum and have been fine until now when I had a serious case of constipation that I am thinking stretched out the rectocele. Long story short ever since that bout of constipation it’s been an ongoing thing. I can no longer go to the bathroom. It doesn’t matter if it’s hard or soft I am unable to get anything out. I constantly feel my rectocele and it is causing me great anxiety. I am about to share way too much, but at this point I am fed up. I have only been able to get out a couple small soft pieces in the last week. Last week I took two enemas just to feel cleaned out because my butt always has pressure in it. I ended going to my doctor yesterday to be put on anxiety meds because my mind has been constantly thinking about when I’m going to poop, if I will be able to poop, and will I need to do an enema. He prescribed me Xanax and it kind of helps. I feel awful right now…..I have never needed anxiety meds until now but I can’t function. What if I have to live with enemas the rest of my life. I feel like there is no way for this to ever get better unless I have surgery. I start PT tomorrow and I am hopeful for that, but I still have anxiety about using the restroom the rest of my life. :( I’m only 28, I”m too young for this. My daughters birth went so smoothly and I didn’t even tear. I can’t believe I am having to live like this.

I'm sorry to hear of your situation Lemonlo. I have never written on this site before but your story sounds so much like mine 2 years ago. I also have rectocele. It sounds like you have a lot to do to get this straightened out. As time goes on it will get easier. The way you toilet yourself when moving your bowels. Your diet. The posture you use. The exercises you do. There's so much to learn here. I hope someone with more experience will reply soon. Don't become obsessed. Do the work that you need to do. Only you can do this. It will get better I promise you that.

First let me state that your doc is incorrect. Rectocele is extremely common among moms of any age. If you have not yet had a chance to look around the site, please start by watching this video, to see what Whole Woman is all about. Then come back with your questions. Rectocele is very manageable through this work. - Surviving

https://wholewoman.com/newpages/video/ww101.html

I wanted to stop in and say hello. You sound very scared right now so please take the time to read about the Whole Woman lifestyle because it will make you feel better, it really will! I have a rectocele, and am new to this too, but assure you that I am way more confident now than I was when I first discovered my prolapse. I am sorry your doctor said that to you. My doctor was the complete opposite and said that many moms get prolapse, and in a way, she expects it. It irritates me that I wasn't informed before giving birth, but I try not to dwell on it. In the meantime, I urge you to take care of yourself, and be gentle with yourself. Nurture your body, eat well, drink well, and get lots of rest. If you try, it will get better.

Welcome Lemonlo87,
I am a PP Mum although a bit further along in my journey. This is the place to be and it sounds like you have found this site really early so that's fantastic.

Go to your PT if you need to but it is wiser to invest your money on the resources on here. Christine's book Saving the Whole Woman is great and it can help to relieve your anxiety. You might like 1st Aid for Prolapse or see what she is going to bring out for PP Mums soon. I have suffered a lot with constipation and only did an enema once. The LoPo position on here and the twist really help me. I cannot imagine my life without this info it certainly would not have much quality and now it I have a great life although a different one since my three prolapses. My constipation was caused by an intolerance to gluten. I have only just figured that out after trying a lot of things. I find my stool changes a bit with hormones and it started when I got pregnant. Maybe that is happening to you.

You will not get any advice on elimination methods from other sources except maybe the squatty potty and please do not use that. You are in the right place. There is a lot on this forum re elimination positions, stories and constipation.

You could book a consult with Christine if you need to as she has such a wise, calming manner that could help your anxiety. I sat on a chair and we sorted my elimination position via Skype.

Although we all have to walk our own path you will find so much support on here.

Hugs
A&L

A&l, what is wrong with the squatty potty?

Here is Christine herself on the subject:
https://www.wholewoman.com/forum/node/4643

Hello! I am new here but when I saw your post my heart went out to you! I can relate so much! I am also young, 31, but my prolapse began 7 years ago! And I only came to know that prolapse was what was wrong with me last year. I had been walking around wondering what in the world was wrong with me all that time! I have stressed and worried and fretted a lot over my problems never going to the doctor because I didn't want anyone probing around on me plus since I didn't know what was wrong I was afraid I would be some doctors guinea pig! Anyway since I home birth I never even had an obgyn check me out after birth and although I asked my midwife some questions I was never really specific about my problems so never got any help. I guess I was too embarrassed to talk about my pooping problem! Anyway, now that I know what's wrong , I have been reading up on posture, alignment and stretches. I am new to all these concepts but am working on it and am at least glad that I am learning and on the right track to healing. So just try to hang in there. Your children need you to be there for them too so try not to stress too much. Just take it a day at a time, keep educating yourself! And just a word of advice, I saw a physical therapist 3 times this past summer but unless the pt you choose understands the importance of alignment and posture the will just tell you to do kegels which is totally frustrating! Good luck! Remember your not alone! There's lots of women struggling with pelvic floor issues and there is hope!

Since you are new to the Whole Woman Forum, I am hoping that you have read the welcome screen which reminds members that this forum is for women who are pursuing or interested in the Whole Woman work. I'm not picking up anything from your post to indicate you are aware of what we do here, so please watch this video:

https://wholewoman.com/newpages/video/ww101.html

You have mentioned a couple of sites whose approaches to prolapse management are not fundamentally in agreement with what Christine teaches us about the true natural posture for pelvic support. Since you have never posted before, I need to bring this to your attention as well as to keep our mission clear to other newbies who might get confused. Thanks! - Surviving

the first thing I did was do the WW posture every minute of the day. I couldn't believe how much it helped me. I also drink tons of water. That is a must. I changed my diet to lots of fruit and vegetables and drink a glass of prune juice each day. I notice that walking always makes me feel better too. (in whole woman posture). I also take medamucil every day. I also use the LoPo method when toileting and I also splint which helps a lot too.

I took my rant down.

Complaining never accomplishes anything and only makes the heart feel heavy.

Love from Christine

I don't recall mentioning any other sites. Maybe I did but I'm
Just trying to figure it all out. I've looked over the site and I'm
Not finding where the posture info would be. Do you have to buy the book for that?

Hi Lemonlo,
It wasn't you that mentioned the other site, but mamaof4munchkins that did. Some people come here bypassing what this site is really all about, and that is whole woman.

The best way to truly understand what whole woman posture is all about is to actually purchase the products. The forum is really here for woman that are following whole woman and have questions about it.

If you go to the whole woman store, you can find many options to get started with this very important work, online, books, and DVDs. The best start is the saving the whole woman book and first aid for prolapse DVD. There are also many videos for post partum moms, including Christine's latest addition whole woman wisdom for the childbearing years.
Check it out! Lots of great stuff!

Dear lemonlo87 & welcome!
I have had a 20yr + journey with rectocele and 3yrs ago, after adopting WWP, walking, breathing into the torso/belly, and doing the exercises later on, has helped me to manage it very well.

You may find that as you have up to 2 years of post partum recovery things will gradually go back into place.
Post partum, I did do a lot of walking ( though before WW for me - would have been great to have known about it then), and fruit in my diet helped change the very round large bowel movements I was getting then. WW walking would have helped me so much more and saved my hips earlier too! I had post partum pressure on my butt too and I think it is the nerves misfiring. That can resolve with time and if I feel pressure now it is a reminder to tweak the posture.

The conventional way of sucking in the stomach and tilting the hips squashes all our internal organs back and down, creating pressure, discomfort, indigestion and trouble with elimination, and tension, creating extra stress and upper chest breathing, muscle, fascia, joint and skeletal issues.

Whole Woman Posture helps our organs have the space to move around and function freely, and when learned, uses less effort and is calming, and free....so in tune with our natural way of being...

I wish you well and congratulations on your new baby,

Aussie Soul Sister

I've been looking at te store on here and there are too many choices o what to buy. I just want to know what's going to help my rectocele. Can someone help and not just give me a sales pitch. Just something that will help me.

Lemonlo,
This site was set up for women to help themselves. The forum is here to help you along with the whole woman work. Look around the site some more to get a better understanding of what this work is all about, but you will never get the whole picture without really studying the work itself. There are no quick fixes to prolapse, and so many of us have benefited and owe so much appreciation to Christine for all her research, and then bringing it to us.

If you are looking for specific suggestions, I think the post-partum bundle is a good choice for you. If you want to start with just one item, then the dvd "First Aid For Prolapse" is the best choice. I personally started with the book, "Saving the Whole Woman" and acquired my collection one piece at a time. But there are great bundles and streaming options. As AG says, you have to spend some time on the site and get your head around all of this, then get busy. No one can do it except you! - Surviving

PS: Feel free to contact Customer Service directly for more suggestions on what to get. We all have our personal favorites but there has been lots of good new stuff put out there lately.

Dear LemonLo,

I'm pretty new to this too (My POP started at 29) and I know how it feels to think you're too young to be dealing with this and its just not fair. Those feelings are all really normal and I think part of it is the mysteriousness of the whole thing. It's not that other women our age aren't dealing with this, it's that no one talks about it.

One thing that surprised me as I've come to terms with my POP is that in some ways, it's a blessing. All the things that we do to take care of our prolapses are really self-care that we should be doing anyway. Because of my POP, now I "have to" eat extremely healthy, get a full night of sleep, watch my posture, exercise daily, and be conscious of how my body moves. If I don't, I become extremely uncomfortable. But if I get it right, I feel much better and not just my prolapse is healthier, but my entire body.

It may be hard to believe, but in a few months you'll look back on this and you might even be grateful that it's happened.

But in the meantime, allow yourself to feel all the grief, rage, and pain. And know that you're not alone...and that there is hope.

Thanks CC, this is a great post.

I have always felt my prolapse was a blessing, for all the reasons you state. But the perspective of you younger ones is so important. It is easy for me to say, I wish I had known about all of this while I was still having kids, or at least, before I hit menopause and the symptoms escalated. But I fully understand it is a different kind of stress and panic that can hit you upon discovery of prolapse while you are still building a family and have a crazy life with kids at home.

This is why stories and posts from PP and younger moms is so vital on this forum. Thanks for sharing and keep up the excellent posture work. The opportunity to deal with this, during these years, is truly one of the blessings. - Surviving

I second this CC what a lovely post.