What do I do now?

Take a deep breath - get a box of tissues at the ready and I shall begin....

OK so you have a cystocele by the sounds of it - Do not worry - Life WILL continue!! (((HUGS)))

Take some deep breaths - I am gonna tell you a story - You will find this site amazing - WE are all here holding you tight in the arms of womankind all over the world - Can you feel us?

Ok - So you know you have a prolapse and it is different down below than normal

Firstly do NOT NOT NOT Kegel yourself to death - This will make things feel worse!!! A few Kegels is ok (I do about 6 a day if I remember - They are not the be all and end all of prolapse my friend)

To over Kegel will make the muscle very tired - This will make the draggy feeling worse cos the muscle will be so tired.

You need to read this site on the posture. THIS is the answer (And no I make no money from this I know this cos I also have a cystocele, and a uterine prolapse and a rectocele to boot - but the cystocele is my primary pain in the 'underparticles' lol

The posture took about three to four weeks before I realised that suddenly the prolapse was no longer annoying me all the time.

You have just had a baby so for the first year your body will be in a mode I call 'Internal fix-it mode'

Take it easy and rest at the moment - Enjoy your baby and try not to stress (Yeah I know - Tears are taking over every waking moment, I was so scared when I got here I was a basket case)

If you wanna talk - email me ok :-) I will answer every question you can think of (Im not a Dr or anything - Just another prolapsed woman who cares)

Once you get the hang of the posture - You - If you are anything like me will only remember you have a prolapse round about period time. If this happens as it doesnt every month - SEX is a good fix it - I just say to my partner ''I have need of your appendage today Mr'' He laughs and understands that the womans insides contract when having sex and this for some reason 'rams' (lololol) the insides back into position and they can feel alot better for weeks - Usually until the next period.

This will not be a problem for you if you only have a mild prolapse as I had a mild prolase for Ummmmmmm 15 or so years before I noticed after my last baby (big age gap) That i even had a problem. lol...

At this moment running I would not reccommend as the jarring might make you feel a bit worse - Once the posture is inside your life and is part of you then running really shoudnt be a problem - I do step aerobics and life weights when I can and it makes no difference to me.

I hope I have answered some of your worries - If not - slap me and I will try again :)

Take care and know that we can all live well with this - There is no total cure all (No not surgery either) But there IS life after this and a good life at that. My prolapse started when I was 20 in 1988 I had a forceps delivery - Since then I have had two more kids and alot more life I've lived - And I am still fine and happy - As will YOU be.

Oh btw... What you feel at the entrance of your vagina might be the pad of fat I felt that covers the bone there :) It is a freaky feeling - But having had my partner down there watching it - It was definitely NOT my bladder lol - The bladder just moved this pad of fat down and made it feel weird...
Sue

Look into the eyes - They hold the key!
http://www.bringmadeleinehome.com/img/maddy544x150Banner.jpg

welcome and congrats on the baby!

you are still so 'postpartum', give your body a chance to rest and heal. growing and birthing a baby is a pretty big deal. I wouldn't push too hard in terms of the running,etc. you ask about 'doing stuff', I'd say do what feels ok. if youre feeling rundown or physically tired, then rest.
be gentle with yourself.

take some time to read through this site and digest the information here. the posture takes some time to learn and get used to, but the good news is that you have all the time in the world.

moving overseas shouldn't stop you from helping your prolapse. you most likely do not need good medical care for a prolapse (although good medical care is always a good thing to have!). you can help yourself, I'd try to get my hands on a copy of christine's book before you leave. that way you can learn about prolapse, its causes and how you can manage it.

the hard part now is to understand that you will not get this straightened out in a few weeks. your choices are pretty much surgery (which is not without risks, especially risk of relapse or developement of other prolapses) or learn to manage it naturally. which takes time.

I think that some healing will take place on its own as your body finds its way back to its prepg state (or something close to it anyway) and if you begin incorporating the posture and exercises here you can help that happen. many postpartum moms here have seen significant improvements during the first year.

and I think you are right, kegals will not lift your bladder. and your dr is not entirely correct in stating that nothing will make it worse. you'd do well to avoid straining on the toilet or sit ups or holding your tummy in.

I can't write more now, my little one calls.
but stick around and ask any questions you may have.

STOP
BREATHE

and now listen\

now is not the time to worry about the rest of your life. you just had a baby, what, like 6 weeks ago?

believe me IT TAKES TIME

now is the time to worry about when the baby's going to wake up, have you eaten breakfast, will the explosive poo stain the wall? try not to worry about anything further away than tomorrow.

I gain between 45 and 55 pounds with each pg. I start off a size 2. at 6 weeks pp I am a size 12. by each baby's first birthday I am back to my size 2's. ok, my ribs and hips did get a bit wider and that hasnt gone back, but that's what happens when you have babies. you will get back into shape. you will resume your normal activity level.
how you feel/look now is NOT an indicator of what you will feel/look like in one year, much less the rest of your life.

as far as what to do now, I think walking will not make your prolapse any worse. try to get into a good posture and walk. slow at first. not too far at first. just enough to get your confidence up.
regarding your PT's advice, I'm not so sure about that. I don't think you have to walk around all day holding a kegel -or your abs tight. and I don't even think its possible.
and I don't think ability to kegel predicts prolapse outcome. some here find them helpful, others not. but I don't think anyone can hold a kegel for a 20 min workout. they are little muscles!

the curve of the low back when in the posture seems to vary, based on what I've read here. I think the main idea is to lengthen your neck, keep shoulders down, and lengthen the space between your breasts and bellybutton. your back will arch automatically if you do this while standing with your feet pointed ahead of you and your knees loose (not bent, not locked). It takes practice.

I'd be hesitant to take the meds too, I've been through PPD before and feel it lurking now, but even so, I'd rather figure it out on my own. I'd be lost, though, without my sister and some very supportive friends. I hope you have some people to lean on now.
email me if you ever want to talk

Dear Alexasmom,

You described me postpartum when you speak of how you feel right now! That was completely me 18 months ago, to a tee. I was so very depressed and felt so alone and scared, and like you I too worried that my life as I knew it was over!

POP is DEVASTATING, completely, I don't think anyone who has not gone through it understands the fear and depression. It really does strike us at our very core as women, especially so soon post partum.

I completely agree with G.Mom. You simply have to take it a day at a time right now. You are not thinking clearly enough to be able to assess what your future looks like right now and trying to do so will drag you down further.

Take it literally one minute to the next if you have to. Rest, try a little walking, but gently gently. Don't do any carrying of heavy things, or cleaning and the like, you truly need to rest and recuperate. I am sure your husband hates to see you this way and is happy to help all he can.

I PROMISE you that you will get through this. You will gradually start daring to do more, and will in turn realise that you can do everything again. You must be gentle with yourself though. I also had depression quite badly I believe now. it is a lonely place, but know we are here. I do agree about meds and trying not to take them, but I also believe that in certain cases they are vital for ones health despite breastfeeding.

I am thinking of you so please take care and KNOW that you will be fine, honest!

Love Michelle.

Woman! having a baby is a ride. It takes your body for a ride and it sure does a job on the psyche. After my first baby I couldn't even watch the news- I just could not believe that such terrible things were going on in the world where my beautiful baby lived.
I want you to know that you will never get your same body back- but who wants it. The body you will have is the one that grew and nurtured your baby right into existence. So while you won't get it back- You will be able to be in fantastic shape and every bit as HOT as you were before. I am like granolamom in that it takes me about a year to fit into my preprego clothing. But I get there- I have been eating a little differently this time because of prolapse so it is happening faster than the last two times- the baby is 9 months old and I am almost back.
I remember wanting my figure back immediately but I got some good advice from a friend and went out and bought some clothing that fit- some pants I liked in a size 10,8, and 6- so that I had stuff to wear as time went on and I didn't have to stress about looking silly in maternity and silly trying to squeeze into my old stuff.
I hope that you will continue to reach out and describe your feelings- and that you will get some sunshine and exercise.
Congratulations on the breastfeeding and enjoy that baby. They grow up so fast-

when i prolapsed i cried for days. I couldn't imagine i would ever do anything again. i was afraid to move because it would get worst i thought. everything terrified me. i woke up every morning terrified it would be worse that day.

and i had two gorgeous children (baby was 3 1/2 weeks at that point...) I couldn't imagine how i would look after them. i'd had a hard pregnancy, very bad symphesis pubis, and just wanted to be back to "normal."

once i decided i did not want surgery, i took a lot of inspiration from the women here and made the decision that this year is all about healing. everything needs to be about healing--i rested all i could, got groceries delivered, didn't clean, lay down a lot, played tons of lego, ate really really well... it made me step back and realize--i'd just had a baby!!!
you have too!!!
in some cultures you would have only started leaving the house around now.
things will get so much better. you need mommying right now--can anyone help?

and have hope. i thought i'd never do anything again. only 5 months later i do most things except lifting anything heavy. yes, my husband will have to do my heavy lifting forever, and friends help out a lot more. but that's what friends are for. it's an adjustment, but then again, i never did like doing large grocery shops ;-)

give yourself time to mourn, to cry, and to heal.
and know you aren't alone
kiki

Hi Alexasmom

I have just looked back to your first post. My heart goes out to you. You must be only days off shifting. You really *need* to get some help with the final tasks, especially those that are physically demanding.

I'm so glad you went back to the doctor even if the news was not good, but you knew that already. Still, it's nice to be acknowledged and to get a spot of sympathy. Pity he can't just wave his magic wand and put it all right. Alas, it doesn't work that way. The other Mums have given you their stories, and they are all true. The body does heal, and you can't hurry it. You will just need to be kind to it.

Walking uphill with groceries will actually be very good for your prolapses, as long as you don't have to negotiate lots of steps with a stroller, and as long as you are not carrying too much and wearing a baby in a sling as well. You may even be able to arrange a delivery service for a little while. Don't worry about it now. Wait until you get there.

Re stool problems, there is a technique called splinting which can be a lifesaver, even just occasionally. It can be a bit offputting but can work really well. You sit on the toilet and put your thumb or finger in your vagina and press gently against the pouch for a few seconds. This kind of straightens it out and allows the stool to move down and keep it straight. It will then often come out by itself in a minute or so. You might find you have to do it every time for a bit, but it can improve so you hardly have to do it at all. You will have to work out how best to make it work for you. I find a thumb works best because it is wider than a finger.

Stress is a great dehydrator too, as I found a few years ago when my marriage was failing. I ended up quite constipated for a year or so, dry mouth, the works. My bowel motions became hard and dry. I was straining too much on the toilet and ended up with a rectocele. I think I may have had it beforehand, but it really made its presence felt when I became constipated. You are also breastfeeding which removes a lot of fluid from your system, and it is summer over in the northern hemisphere. Try to drink a big glass of water every time you feed your baby, that might also help. BTW, I left the marriage then returned to start again. It was worth it. :-)

The suppositories. You would need to speak to a child health nurse and pharmacist about that, but I doubt it would hurt the baby's digestion unless there is something else in the suppository that was absorbed by your lower bowel. As far as I can see glycerin suppositories will just lubricate the inside of the bowel so it is more slippery.

Re posture. Granolamom's comments are spot on, and her explanation says it all. She is a wonderful role model who has a very healthy attitude to what she can expect of herself. Taking a leaf out of the books of the other ladies will see you being a little easier on yourself. You are dealing with a lot of stuff at the moment, and might need to just change the way you are thinking a little bit. It won't always be like this. This too will pass.

Exercise. I too would question anybody's ability to contract PF muscles for a whole workout. It is the very first time I have heard of a woman being told that, and I have heard a lot of pelvic floor instructions in my time! ;-). Many women find that this simply tires them, then they sag all the time. Then you really are back to square one. The other thing is that I have only ever heard instructions that say to *relax* the abdominals when you do PF exercises. I think it was said to encourage me to isolate the two groups of muscles. It is not easy to do at first, and when you start exercising the abdominals it all gets very confusing. I think you do need to keep the exercises for the two groups completely separate. The Wholewoman posture is not a workout, but a way of life. When you stand in Wholewoman posture you need to ignore your abdominals altogether, or consciously relaxing them if you have to. Raising the breastbone will automatically pull your tummy in, though only a few weeks postpartum you will probably think it is not enough. It is. Believe me, and your belly will get smaller and smaller all year, especially if you are working on overall muscle tone as separate exercise. At the moment your body needs as much belly space as it can get to reposition your bladder and uterus over your pubic bone, not over your pelvic floor (where it will be if you pull in your lower abdominals. These organs need the space to move forwards where they are supported by solid bone. This also takes the load off these little pelvic floor muscles.) It is such a temptation to pull those abs in when you just want to have a normal l-sized tummy again. <:->

Kegals. I think these have been shown to be very useful for recovering from urinary incontinence, but basically useless for building up muscular support for prolapsed organs. I would imagine that if they get too well-toned they could squash the organs downwards instead of yielding to let them back upwards again when you move into an appropriate position.

Hope these are useful thoughts. Good luck. Keep calling back, and I hope your move goes smoothly.

Cheers

Louise