PLEASE help with pessary choice

Body: 

I posted a help request titled 'Uterine Prolapse Pessary' of 9/2. 63 people have read my post, and no one has responded. I can't tell you how that makes me feel. This is the first time that I have EVER had the nerve to put a post on the internet to request help, and noone has answered. My uterine prolapse at Stage 2 might not be as bad as some people, but it is terrifying to me. My doctor, who is a participating provider on my insurance (I'm stuck with him) doesn't have much knowledge about pessaries. I really would like to hear from prople who wear pessaries for uterine prolapse - if they are able to remove them at home and how successful they are - and how comfortable. Please, would someone respond.

I'm sorry that no one responded to your first post. I have cystocele (bladder prolapse) not uterine prolapse. I have used a donut pessary, and I still do on occasion. This type is for me, relatively easy to insert and remove - I understand that the ring type is similarly easy. Having said, that I will point out that some women who have posted here have had difficulty with insertion/removal and discomfort while wearing the donut pessary. It may not work as well for uterine prolapse as for bladder.
I recommend that you Google "pessary" and look at the different types before meeting with your healthcare provider. It will almost certainly take some experimentation with various types and sizes to find one that works for you, and there is the chance that you will not find any that are comfortable and provide the support you need.
Make good use of the resources at your disposal here on this website - search the forum for threads where pessaries are discussed (you will find many!). Also, consider purchasing Christine's book - she has a short chapter on pessary use, and you will find so much of interest re: uterine prolapse and related issues - I guarantee you, it will be money well spent!
I am happy to answer any follow-up questions - I hope this is helpful to you, and please don't give up on the forum!
Jean

It isn't that I don't think a stage 2 is bad- I know it is. I just don't know anything about pessarys. did you enter it into the search function yet? I know on this site I read something about using fishing line......keep asking questions brave woman.

hi goldfinch
I'm sorry I didn't respond to your first post. I was one of the 63 readers, I just didn't have any answers for you. didn't mean to give the impression that your concerns aren't worthy of attention or anything like that.
I've never used a pessary so I don't know much about them.
Please don't be put off by the lack of response to your question. I've had some posts and questions gone unaswered as well. I guess when people don't know they just don't respond, rather than say they don't know. I sometimes forget that behind every question is a woman who may be worrying sick about her prolapse (like I did when I first got here). so thank you for the reminder, stick around and keep asking whatever questions you have.
we really do care
(((hugs)))

I got up this morning and was so excited to see the 3 replies to my post. Thank you all so much for your support and information. I do have Christine's book, and I set up my Google email account for daily alerts on the word' pessary'. But I didn't know that I could search this site for old threads. That has proved to be very helpful. I know now that it is really up to me to be in charge of this situation, even though my doctor seems to think he is (!) He has already commented that he would prefer to do surgery - it feels like an uphill battle with him. Although he is willing to fit me for a pessary, I'm just not sure he knows of all the optional types available, and also some of the consequences of using the wrong size (which I learned by reading the old threads). I have another appointment with him this morning, so thank you all again for responding. I am very grateful. Goldfinch1

Hi Goldfinch

I was one of the readers too, but I am not a pessary user. I did have one fitted about 15 years ago but I did not know at the time that I could get different types and different sizes, and it was a bit of a failure. There is so much better information now. I would just rather do without devices if I can, and I seem to be going OK, so don't bother. Sea sponges are another option that you can be in charge of because you don't have to get them through a doctor. Some women find these work OK. Just search it.

Yes, doctors often do think they are in charge (of treating your prolapses). That's probably because people have historically regarded doctors as the people you go to when you need fixing up. In your dreams. My Mum's generation would no sooner ask a doctor questions, or disagree with what they recommended, than fly to the moon. I am afraid our generation has a different approach.

Of course you can be in charge! A doctor is only one provider of health help, though in some countries they are either employed by, contracted to, or funded by the taxpayer, so it is like a 'free' service. It is like they are 'endorsed' for better or worse over other types of health helpers. Don't get me wrong. They know a lot of stuff, but IMHO they go past their area of competence sometimes, so I feel I need to research before I go, and double check prescriptions and treatments before I embark on them. I have had really good relationships with doctors and terrible relationships with doctors, good treatment and prescriptions and really unskillful and inapproprriate treatment and prescriptions.

That doesn't make them bad. If it is my body it has to be my decision and I need to be happy that it is appropriate. Some are like used car salesmen and can't be trusted as far as you can throw them. Others are great. It is just another marketplace. They are not gods. They just know more about medicine than I do!

The reason he said he would like to do surgery is that he may not have had a lot of experience or success with pessaries, and surgery is really the only other treatment that doctors do for prolapse. In general surgical procedures for simple prolapse are a bit like amputating the arm if a wrist is broken. There are much less damaging ways to get rid of the broken bone, like wrapping it up and waiting, then having physio to get the muscles working again. Most know little or nothing about other therapies or Christine's work. Perhaps you could ask him what other treatments he knows about?

Good luck with the doctor. Your journey is only just beginning. You have lots of healing ahead of you. Let us know how you go.

Cheers

Louise

That NOBODY can advise you on WHICH Pessary is best as they are not INSIDE of you!

Firstly can I say that once you start using a Pessary there is a good chance that you may need this for the rest of your life as your body will start to depend on this extra non-human support inside of you and it will not be holding itself up in the same way.

If your prolapse is Mild - Use posture to get it back - Mine was a stage 2 also when I got here and through posture and not Kegelling myself to death it is now a stage 1 and I get no problems at all from it so it can be done.

The problem with recommending a pessary to you is HUGE - There are many many Pessaries out there and when a Dr gives it to you he doesnt tend to name it. The pessary my mother has is a basic RING pessary. Her Gynae told her she will need this for life now. She is 63 so I guess that is not the same as it would be for a 30yr old...

There are so many types of pessaries on the market that it is truly not possible to recommend one. Also - We are not Doctors here and it is not advisable to do this.

I had one for 18hrs and hated it - Very painful to get in and out. Hence posture being important to me. When i got my pessary that time my prolapse was just uterine - Now i have 3 prolapses!

Personally if you want advice - I say use posture and RELIGIOUSLY use posture. That helps the body to aid itself without lil plastic inserts.

I hope you find this of some help.

Sue

Look into the eyes - They hold the key!
http://www.bringmadeleinehome.com/img/maddy544x150Banner.jpg

I have been using a pessary successfully for two years now and it is the best thing since sliced bread. I don't need to use it all the time. On the contrary, if I wear it for a few days, it seems to "push everything back up" and then I don't need it for weeks at a time. Don't ask me to explain, I know that isn't rational, but it certainly seems to be the way it works for me.

I have the doughnut type. It is "uncomfortable" to insert and remove and by "uncomfortable" I mean very painful. But the pain lasts only a split second as it passes the point of most resistance. If you've had a baby naturally, or passed a very big hard feces, it's just that same stretchy feeling, that's all. Something you can easily handle if you realize it's only a split second. Also, you get a lot better at inserting and removing it with practice. I can do it very fast and easily now.

I can't tell you what type you should have. But some doctors are not good at fitting them. They will give you the wrong one or one that isn't the right size and you will then say, "pessaries are no good!" and give up. So if you don't like the first one, go back, get another kind or another size. Try several until you get the one that works for you. Or look for a different doctor, one who is more skilled at fitting pessaries.

I too have a donut pessary and found it uncomfortable at times to insert and remove. I used to use KY jelly and it helped some. Since then I have purchased "ww bliss balm." What a difference.
I put some in my vagina and rub some on the outer part of my vagina, the pessary slips in like a dream and goes into place by itself. I also take several deep breaths before I proceed as I find when I'm relaxed as possible things go more smoothly.
Regards
Flora

I want to thank everyone for their input. I firmly believe that we all need to help ourselves. Everyone's situation is unique, and knowlegde is power. Realizing that we're not alone and that there are other people who can offer their experiences and opinions helps tremendously. I'm trying to create a database of knowledge about pessaries so that I can deal with whatever happens next. Maybe the first one, or two, or three won't work, but now I know that other people have had this happen to them, and they have continued to try until they found a pessary to work for them! That in of itself is encouraging and helpful. Believe me, I was not expecting anyone to tell me what to do. But as a typical type 'A' personality, I need as much information as I can get. I have found more infomration on this forum that I have using my Google 'alert' option and I truly appreciate that. I plan on reading Christine's book again to try and master the correct posture and other exercises that she recommends. I would like to keep you all in the loop as my situation evolves if that would be OK. Believe me, this is the first time I have EVER entered a post on a forum. I hope that I have done everything right. Please correct me if I am using the 'reply' button when I should be using the 'add new comment' button. I'm not sure when to choose one over the other.
Goldfinch1

Seriously consider Colpexin, it changed my life!

Similar to a pessary but I have noticed improvement in my pelvic floor strength. Also, I love that it has a string like a tampon and I can take it out and clean it easily. I feel better and finally like I have control.

Only problem is, not many doctors know much about it. There is a website www.colpexin.com, but a doctor has to order it for you.

Thank you so much for the information about Colpexin. I did hear from another member who uses the 'donut' pessary, but that's all. I'm emailing the Colpexin web site to my doctor.

I like the idea that Colpexin also helps in strengthing the pelvis floor if exercises are done while wearing it. I'm trying hard to learn as much about the available pessary options as I can, since I know I have to help myself in this process.

Has anyone else used the Coplexin successfully or unsuccessfully?

Hi all

I think we have had women mention a pessary with a string before. Not sure how they went with it. I seem to remember that one woman recently found it quite useless, but it might not have been the same pessary, and my memory is sketchy. No doubt there are new models brought out all the time.

Just a word of caution too. Just because somebody posts a rave report on this site, or any site, about a product, be aware that it may not be a genuine testimonial, rather an advertisement. Not saying this is necessarily the case with this one. It is always a case of "Check it out yourself".

But at least we know about it now, so thanks for the info.

Cheers

Louise

If you look at the pictures, you can see a bladder cystocele but the uterus is still high. I rather doubt this product would contain a severely prolapsed uterus, as it would likely be pushed out of the vagina pretty easily. If you have only a minor uterine prolapse, I can see where this may be useful for the vaginal wall weakness, in other words, bladder prolapse and perhaps rectocele.

Most women who have given birth have less tone than they did before. If your introitus is very tight and toned perhaps the device would contain the pressure of the uterus from above, but it seems the smooth round design would make it easy to be expelled otherwise. There is a reason most pessaries are designed to be a shape that will "tuck" it up behind the pubic arch.

Don't get me wrong; it's definitely worth a try, particularly if it helps someone avoid surgery. I'm glad people are still trying to come up with new and better pessary designs.

I've been following this site for about 2 months. I got myself a block of beeswax for $7 and looked at the designs and dimension of manufactured pessaries. I molded several different kinds. I'm currently wearing 2 inch donut. I take it out every night and rinse it off with hydrogen peroxide. Every morning it smells like free beeswax. Today I finally have an gyn appt I have been waiting for since March. I took matters literally into my own hands.

Good for you. and do you like it? is it helping? does it change shape after a long day?

I want to thank everyone who has so graciously responded with their experiences and ideas about pessaries. I have learned more from reading the threads on this forum that I have from all of the Googles searches that I have done. Since I bought Christine's book, I have been practicing sitting correctly (I have a desk job), standing correctly and, whenver I can, walking correctly. I have been kegeling myself to death and can now pull my cervix up about 1 1/2 inches. The Colace has also done wonders - no more pushing! I am now beginning to wonder if I really need a pessary at all. What frightens me the most is possibly causing another prolapse as a result of wearing one - there has been some mention of that happening on other posts. The beeswax sounds very interesting, but again I am afraid I might cause myself harm in some way if it didn't fit right.

I'm keeping my dr appointment on 10/3, but I'm now going with a VERY open mind. If I don't like the pessary he is proposing that I use, I will just say 'no thank you'.

My goal is to continue with Christine's guidelines and see how much more improvement I can make. I feel that by strengthing myself both physically and mentally I can hopefully prevent this situation from worsening and I will be able to live with this.

I would never be at this point if it weren't for this forum, however. I bless the day that my Google search returned the link to me. This is the first place I come whenever I turn on my computer. Bless you all!
Goldfinch :)

Hi Rchutka

How very enterprising of you. There have been a couple of other posts about beeswax pessaries which have been made by therapists but I don't think anybody has reported about making their own.

As an enthusiastic make it yourself person I can relate to your solution. There is something intrinsically satisfying about making your own personal answer from simple materials.

One of the things that has always put me off getting a pessary is that I have to find somebody who is competent, travel a 3 hour round trip to get there, pay them a lot of money, and have them stick it up my vagina and tell me whether it fits or not (Ask MeMyselfAndI about that part!), then possibly have them tell me that only they can remove it and clean it. I put myself in the hands of somebody else to do the whole process, then if it is not right, pay again for them to go through the whole process again. Hey, whose vagina is it anyway??

Am I or am I not a competent human being? Have I ever put anything in my vagina before? If it goes in, will it come out? Is the pope Catholic???

It is just like jewellery making, or sculpture. Fundamental design and manufacture. Why all the medical specialty bulls**t?? Anybody could do this.

Good on ya. I hope others are inspired to do the same. Got any practical hints on handling beeswax as a medium? Tools you used? temperatures or means of heating the stuff?

How 'bout a video on Utube? The mind boggles... Or some images on a website?

Cheers

Louise

If you feel comfortable with things, there is no need to wear a pessary. But if you do wear one, I seriously doubt it could hurt you. The only thing I worry about is that it does need to stretch the introitus quite a bit when I insert and remove it. I wonder if I am making the thing even more lax than it already is. But I don't see how it could damage any of the internal tissues, assuming of course that it is sized and fitted correctly in the first place.

And the worst of it is, my gynecologist is MALE. The key is that we need to be comfortably familiar with our own bodies. Don't be shy about exploring it and getting acquainted with it. When you know yourself intimately, you have GOT to be better than some man doctor in knowing what works for you. And when you know first hand exactly how your prolapses are arranged, they are less frightening.

I can remember being in early labor before I ever went to the hospital and wondering how far along I was. Was I going to drive in to the hospital to be checked only to be told to go back home and wait a few hours?? Ludicrous! I just stuck my finger up there and felt for myself how much, if any, the cervix had opened. Yeah, yeah, I know, risk of infection, shouldn't have done that, blah, blah. BAH!

I agree with what Anne says. We actually put all sorts of non-sterile things in our vaginas, like penises for instance. And the vagina is self-cleaning (or what are vaginal secretions for?), as is the uterus after childbirth.

Of course you wouldn't put your finger in your vagina if you were in the middle of turning the compost bin, or washing up, but of course it is a sensible way of assessing what is going on in there. It is your body after all. You have more of a right to be in there than anybody else in the world!

The other comment I would make is that a baby's head stretches the introitus a lot more than a pessary, so if you have had a baby vaginally it would be unlikely to cause any damage. The secret is probably that a baby's head stretches the introitus very, very slowly, and in the right direction. Some warmth and massage of the perineum and introitus before inserting the pessary might help, along with some Wholewoman Bliss Balm and active relaxation, just like chldbirth.

When I first found something protruding out of my vagina, I went to my gyn who, of course, examined me lying down and told me to go home, do kegels and use estrace cream. I then went to a urogyn specialist in Philadelphia who examined me upright and was able to diagnose the condition as uterine proplase. He confirmed that a pessary would be a good choice for me (did not push surgery at all). However, when I went back to my gyn to talk about the pessary, he looked at me and said "You know, I don't make any money fitting you for a pessary." Though I am still seeing him for the time being, I am actively seeking out a new gyn. Am taking my time to make sure I don't end up with another one with THAT attitude. I will never forget his words.....

cannot believe your gyn actually said that to you!
well, at least he was being honest

Hi Goldfinch. Your gyn's comment was either so far off appropriate that it is laughable, or very honest and perceptive, or he has a tongue that is too quick for his brain. I just hope he didn't have a speculum inside you when he said it!! That could well have caused serious injury to both of you! LOL I would prefer to think it was said in jest.

Cheers

Louise

There was no laughter or little 'wink' after he said it. I believe it was a little bit of him being honest about his situation (he used to be part of a group and is now alone) but also verbalizing something that he had no business saying outloud to me. Oh, and no, Louise, the exam part of the visit was already over!!!

Just found out today, via email, that the Colpexin is what my GYN has ordered for me - my appointment is 10/3. It's funny how far I have come since being on this site. I never wanted surgery (I've had 5 in my lifetime - 2 of which were for an ectopic pregnancy and an inguinal hernia), and I thought that the pessary would be a great option. But now I am actually fearful that using one will be the wrong thing to do. Does anyone have experience with the Colpexin?

hello, i've had surgery for bladder pin up and rectocelle. the rectocelle is worse and the improvement to the bladder is minimal. my urologist also suggested a pessary which i was open to. it took at least one-two hours working with the nurse practitioner to find the right type and fit (one that stayed in place for me after walking around and urinating). anyway after trying about 12 different shapes, we finally found one that stayed in place (she had me walk around and urinate). it's slightly uncomfortable getting in (not painful though) and it does push everything up.

good luck

Hi I posted a while back and ive had since my last post a ring pessary fitted thing was we are not shown here in the UK how to fit or remove a pessary and have to depend on the doctors but we don't have to pay a penny or a $ which is great
Anyway i got my ring fitted and I thought it would sit at the top of my vagina but before i left the hospital i went into the toilet as i was terrified of it falling out
I did test it with my finger and a quarter of an inch into my vagina could feel the ring
I was in shock and rushed back into the doctor telling her it had fallen out. She then went to examine me and asked for the fallen out ring I said it is still inside me but it has fallen down into my vagina, she then examined me and said that this pisition was OK and that the ring did this (shock)!!!!!! So up I got and drove home. By the time i got home my rectum was killing me and i felt my vagina was in the grip of a vice, the vice grip eased off but my back end was killing me, it took me 3 days to find a doctor to take it out and my back has been killing me ever since also my rectocele is worse....... SIGH Not to worry Ive been doing my posture and thank God before i went my cyscotele had been getting better some days not feeling it at all but now I have problems with my rectum
Anyway they offered me another pessary after apologising for me having to wait the 3 days it's called a shelf pessary which is supposed to sit at the top of the Vagina and not fall into it
Has anyone else had this problem? I have told the doctors i'll leave it for a bit.
and does anyone else get lower backache?
BTW I think you are all great and this place to me has been a life saver

I have no doubt the doctor was serious when he told you "he didn't make any money fitting pessaries". I've had about 3 similar experiences. I've always told my husband some of these doctors were just padding their portfolios. After my first cancer dx, the gyn doc told me I should take Premarin. He didn't believe HRT would cause or aggravate the cancer and seemed peeved that I asked so many questions. He turned to my husband and said, "She sure would be a whole lot easier to get along with if you'd convince her to take this"!!!! I was out of there!
The second episode was after I'd contacted 9 other gyn's offices to see if one would take me as a patient if I refused HRT - they all said no. The 10th dr's office said come on in. He was kind but still encouraged me take HRT. Over a period of a year, he very charmingly called the house to see how I was doing and would casually mention a new HRT product that was coming out the following year that he thought would be good for me. I was still adamant about not taking it. My husband accompanied me on my next office visit with him where he got very pushy about putting me on the new drug. Me being equally pushy about not taking it, he finally threw down his pen, and said "I can't believe you won't take this, besides I get $500 for every woman I put on this!!!! No kidding! No jesting! I looked at my husband and said "See? I told you so!" The doc looked kind of peeved that he'd said too much, said he had another patient to see and left the room. I never went back to him either.

In recent years, I had occasion to visit with a relative who is a liason between drug companies and doctors for setting up conventions to introduce "new" drugs to them. This convention was an all expense paid weekend at an expensive resort where the docs were given the FDA approved???? info on the new drug. Turned out it was a drug given to me 4 years previously (during chemo)that caused severe muscular contractions (like a seizure) and nearly killed me. My oncology nurse was on the phone with us during this episode and said there was nothing she could do but she would stay on the line to see if I made it through the seizures! I had been experimented on and didn't even know it!

So yes, those types of doctors are out there and it behooves us to avoid them.

Sorry you had that type of experience, too.

Love and blessings,
Grandma Joy

Thank you so much for sharing your experience and I am truly sorry to hear that you went thru that. I'm searching for a replacement dr, but as you so vividly stated, it isn't easy. In the meantime, since I am dealing with another issue not apropos to this forum, I need to stay with him for the (hopefully short) time being.
Love and blessings to you too!
Goldfinch1

As another example of poor care, and another consideration concerning menopause, I went for a routine check up and my doctor told me that I had Lupus. Apparently, my immune system was "out there." After some tests, Lupus was ruled out - duh.

A year later, I went in again and was told I had diabetes. My blood sugar was high. I struggled with diet and exercise and brought it down to a respectable level, but by God, I was going to have diabetes or else! He gave me a diet that was filled with foods that would feed diabetes. What an idiot!

A year later I was told I might have kidney cancer. I was supposed to have an IVP for a trace of blood in my urine. I said, "I'm allergic to dye." He said, "It's not dye; it's contrast material." I asked, "Would it be prudent to have this test without any symptoms except this trace of blood that I've had for twenty years if I could die from the dye?" and he got mad. He also suggested that I have a battery of other tests which make my skin crawl.

When I left his office, I broke out in cold sores and threw up for three days. I found another doctor.

The new one said I was absolutely not a diabetic because my A1C is low. At the lupus, he just rolled his eyes. The kidney cancer we never got to.

What I found out on my own is that during menopause several regular counts will rise: blood sugar, immune system index, blood pressure, and weight, and often lead doctors who know nothing at all about menopause to think you are seriously ill. These things relax after a while. My blood pressure jumped 30 points. Now it's back to 100/60. I was supposed to start high blood pressure meds for menopause!

It's bad enough when they get it wrong; it's absolutely stupid when they double the trouble with being rude or mercenary. I can tell you right now, if a doctor said something about not making money, or insulted me or made a rude comment, I would call the American Medical Association and turn him in. That is completely unacceptable and irresponsible and loathsome. I would certainly never ever ever return and would probably tell the entire waiting room what had happened. But then, I'm a witch.

Judy

Change what you can change; be happy with what you cannot.

Hi there, I've been a member for about 2 years, and am trying my best to avoid surgery!
I recently got my 2nd pessary! First one was a donut and too hard to insert! And kept coming out! 2nd one was a ring w/ support and good for 1 day and became painful so I took it out and haven't had the nerve to put it back in! My question to you is what is the Beeswax for? Is it your pessary? And where do you get it? Is it working for you? Have you tried the Diva cup? Wonder if that would work! I'm very interested in the Beeswax! When warmed with body temp what happens?
Nancy

Tell me more about the beeswax please! I'm 63, been here for 2 years and have ups and downs about the surgery! Just got my 2nd pessary, and have to say, it's been better than the first! I remember the first one becomming painful after 12 hours, and taking it out! Then when re-inserting it, funny here, it would fly across the room! The donut style was not flexible enough! Now I have a ring with support (1 week only) and like another gal said, I can wear it for about 16 hours and then when it starts slipping I take it out and things stay in place for several hours after its out! I like it better than the donut! Don't forget, everyone is made different so what works great for one does't necessarily work well for another! I am very much interested in the Beeswax! Tell me more please! $7 is a lot cheaper than an office call to the gyno! Right now I have a female gyno and is willing to let me make the cholce! At least for now! She has mentioned surgery a couple of times, to tell me my options, should I get tired of the pessary! Sewing it shut was the latest!?? Don't want to think of that right now! It sounds weird, but I'm not sexually active anymore, so ????? Thanks here, Nancy

Hi Louised, You and I have been here awhile! So tell me what you know about the Beeswax pessary? Please! Have you tried to make one? It sounds so interesting! Then a gal can try different shapes and it wouldn't cost a couple of hundred bucks each time! Never heard of them before here last week! Nancy

Anne, On my second pessary and it's just like you explained! Everything stays up for awhile! I didn't have any luck inserting the donut by myself though! Too slippery and went flying! The ring w/support,(as Christine mentioned)seems to work well, but this is only my second week and have only worn it about 4 days total! I am comfortable without it after wearing it for about 24 hours! But this "Beeswax" thing is very interesting! Write me when you can! Nancy

O.K. gals, Help me find the block of beeswax!!! I've called the health food store and a vitamin store, so where else do I try! Maybe a bee keeper??? Am very interested in the homemade pessaries! Please reply! Nancy

Hi Nancy

I do remember it being raised on the Forum between 1 and 2 years back. Somebody dug up an historical reference to it, and another woman had a midwife or other nurse or physio who made it for her and fitted it. Christine may or may not have commented on it. Can't remember. I have never used a beeswax pessary and have not had any particular benefit from a pessary. Too hard.

I think beeswax is used in the bronze and jewellery casting business (lost ...? method). From memory, you sculpt the model in beeswax, cover it all with plaster, heat it up to melt out all the wax then pour in the molten bronze. When the bronze has set you crack it off with a mallet. I would try a jewellery supplier or small foundry supplier.

Try using the search box too. It will probably dig something up. If you can find the poster's name you might be able to email them. Alternately they might just read this and come out of hibernation.

Cheers

Louise

Hi Judy

All this talk about tests being ordered for wierd things happening in the bod is ringing bells for me. I haven't had imaginary lupus yet but there have been suggestions of all the others and the tests have all proved negative. I am currently waiting for a cardiologist appointment, as I have irregularly high blood pressure on a 24 hour monitoring session.

I also take a drug which routinely ups the BP, as a side effect of enabling me to think and remember things, and as I am now near menopause the specialist wants me to get it checked out, as a man about my age taking the same drug keeled over with a stroke or something. I will be asking the cardiologist for an account of this incident and research results that indicate some real benefit in taking blood pressure lowering medication (not just a differential benefit) to lower the incidence of heart attacks and strokes. I have a feeling it may be a 'difficult' consultation, as this other specialist said in the the referral that I was "resistant to taking BP lowering medication". I think this is medi-speak for "This patient is a difficult woman!"

So I was particularly interested in your description of blood pressure going beserk for a while during crazypause. I shall be researching that before I go. Thankyou, thankyou, thankyou!!! My Mum has had some nasty experiences with BP lowering medication. I don't want to go down the same path unless I can see a measurable benefit for me in the face of the difficulties that so many people experience in getting the dosage right for them, adn other related side effects like fainting in dangerous places and stopping me from getting good exercise in case I keel over and fall under a truck at an inopportune moment. And if my BP is variable anyway, that smells like trouble to me!

Cheers

Louise

Louise,

The whole stupid business started about 5-6 years ago with a regular check up. "You have lupus," said the doctor. "Your antibodies should be about 40 and they are 160." For two weeks I read everything I could about this fate. I had a second test and the test came out normal, but ID, better known as idiot doctor, wasn't interested in why I had a high antibodies score. and just brushed it off as "too deep for me."

The next year, I went in and was told I had a high sugar count - 138 - and I was a diabetic. I gasped and went home and read everything I could about diabetes. Meanwhile ID sent me a diet. Now mind you, the diet was all kinds of things I never put into my mouth like overcooked meat, canned fruit, white bread, gravy!!! and mashed potatoes!!! I called to tell him that I didn't eat that stuff, and I was yelled at. "Well you better start!!!" Needless to say, he didn't ask me what I did eat and I tossed the diet into the garbage because those foods will make you a diabetic if you aren't one already!

Then I developed what I call the low glycemic diet. I took my diet back to ID in three months and he was cheerful about it as if I was a child and had brought him a rock. He tested my blood again, and it was in the normal range, but he said, "Good you are handling your diabetes with diet, but you will need medication soon." I continued to eat properly for a year and then went in again for another regular visit.

This time, I had blood in my urine and could have kidney cancer, and he wanted me to have an IVP. I'm allergic to dye and told him so, and he laughed at me and told me it wasn't really dye, it was "contrast material." My response was: If I have no symptoms of illness at all except for a trace of blood in my urine, and I have this test, and I die, is that prudent?" He got mad and tried to order the test anyway, and I just said I wouldn't be having that one. I've had traces of blood in my urine since the beginning of perimenopause. I don't suppose it will kill me, but he could have.

Then he tested my blood sugar and said I was definitely a diabetic and would need medication. At that time he also told me that I had high blood pressure.

I fled from his office retching and shivering and spent three sleepless nights, and ended up with a fleet of cold sores. Then I decided to get another doctor. The new doctor told me I was suffering from menopause. I was not a diabetic because my A1C was really low, and that the increase was stress related probably due to the menopause, and it will drive blood sugar up. The stress was probably causing my blood pressure to soar as well. The lupus thing he just rolled his eyes at. This was a really good guy who ended up leaving his practice to take a job as a surgeon. He wasn't particularly concerned about the blood in my urine - stress.

But more specifically with the blood pressure deal, it's a creeping inching business that slowly seems to become high blood pressure. My blood pressure as a young woman was always 90/60. As I slowly put on mid life crisis weight and entered perimenopause, it began to get higher - 100/70?? Then during crazypause it soared to 140/80 and in the office 150/80. I was under such physical stress with the emotional roller coaster, I'm sure I was up and down the scale day in and day out. I'm sure ID would have treated it.

There was weight gain no matter what I ate, and 20 pounds at our age can make a big difference in blood pressure, and I put on 35. Then as crazypause began to abate, it dropped again. The whole thing was probably 3 years of up and down blood pressure. My usual blood pressure now is about 105/65 to 110/70. My weight is returning to normal, and I'm exercising again. I give platelets every month, and I'm fine.

I think the thing to tell a doctor at this point is "Let's wait and see." Ask him about the stresses of perimenopause and menopause, and see what he says. If he waves you off, ask him what he knows about perimenopause and menopause. Most doctors don't know ANYTHING about these things. Then be more specific and ask about blood pressure and stress and if the stress of P and M could be affecting your blood pressure.

As for me, I don't want to take ANY medications and I will exercise and diet as much as I have to to avoid these things. I especially don't want to take medication for things I don't have, and I don't want to have tests for things I don't have, and I don't want to be bothered with panic about illnesses I don't have. Slapping a bandaid on something may seem fine to a doctor, but if you're allergic to bandaids like I am, it can be more dangerous than benign neglect.

Let me know,

Affections galore,

Judy

I don't know where to get a beeswax pessary, but if it is beeswax you are looking for, you can order it from many herbal companies. I used to get mine from Jean's Greens in upstate NY (I used it to make herbal preparations).
I can look up the number for you if you would like it.

I have found and online shop in the UK that sells 1oz blocks of pure beeswax but I am really unsure as to what you would do with it. What sort of pessary do you mold, a tampon shape or something? Also how do you clean it and wouldn't it be slippery?

I think I am going to have to try a tampon for now as things feel really low and uncomfortable. My period is due sometime within the next 5 days so don't know if that is playing its part but I am a little freaked out.

I've had my pessary for 6 weeks now (I'm 65 - Stage 2 cystocle.) Took a bit of settling down but I'm very happy with it now. Don't feel it at all, and although it's a mission to get it out - harder than getting it in - I feel I can manage. It's a latex ring, about 3 inches, with a latex center with two large holes and two small holes. To remove it it's more effective to hook a thumb through a hole than a finger.

My concerns are:
(a) the gyn said to use Estrace cream (estrogen) which I am opposed to because of all that cancer scare stuff, and do you know a tube costs $90!!!
(b) Also to use Trimosan to "keep the vaginal Ph correct". There have been negative comments about that stuff too.

I am just going to try using KY jelly because I do find I need something lubricating to help get the thing in.

The gyny (a young woman, very competent and sensible I thought) said it was up to me to manage it as I saw fit - I could take it out regularly or leave it in up to a week or so. I leave it in about 5 days. And sex is no problem with it in.

She said to do kegels but can you do them with a pessary in place?

This is a great site to discuss all these things which your husband doesn't really want to hear about!

Hi Annette,
Welcome to the forum.
I too have a pessary and I use Bliss balm when I insert my pessary and for lubrication.
I used to use KY jelly and it was satisfactory but I find the Bliss balm quite
superior.
There are three balms especially formulated to be used on a woman's genital area.
The balms are organic and are pesticide and chemical free.
If you use the search box on the left and type in balms it will take you to some posts
from women who have used them including me.
If you are interested in trying them or one of them they can be purchased
from the Whole Woman Store, which can be accessed from the main page.
Or you can type "wholewomanstore.com"into your search engine.
I would ask your doctor about doing kegels with your pessary in to be sure. I do them when
I have my pessary in. I did not ask my doctor but if you have any doubts clear it with your doctor first.
Do let us know how you get on and ask any questions you like, someone will try to answer them.
Regards,
Flora

Hi Flora and Annette

I am just wondering if it is wise to use an oil-based lubricant (eg Bliss Balm) on a latex pessary (if that is what either of you have)? I know it can be a problem with latex condoms.

Does anybody have any knowledge about this????

Louise

Hi Louise,
My pessary is made of silicone so can't answer your question.
In other words I don't have a clue!!!
Someone else will have to answer that one.
Regards,
Flora

Hi Flora,

Thanks for the comment. I will try the KY jelly first - if it's not satisfactory I'll try the Bliss balm.

Does anyone have anything to say regarding Estrace (estrogen cream) or Trimosan? I am leery about both.

I'm also wondering about the long term. Is there anyone out there who's worn a pessary for a long time - say over ten years?

Annette

Hi again, Annette
Go to the blogs and read Christines comments on trimosan. You will find it
under "Not Safe for cows.....but women". If you scroll down to the bottom of the list on the left you will find it
My first gyno told me to use premarin cream when he gave me my first pessary,which I believe has some estrogen in it.
He p....d me off so I went to another gyno (a woman) and told her I was using premarin,
she told me to stop. The only reason she would give me was that they don't recommend its use any more. I quit using it. I did not find it was doing much good anyway.
I have used a pessary for about 7 years now and have not had any problems. I go and have everything checked every 6 months or so. I also do not wear it all the time.
Hope this helps some.
Regards,
Flora

Hi Guys,
My experience of pessaries to add to the pot:
I was diagnosed with a cystocele at 3 weeks pp 9 months ago. I (thank heavens) found this site straight away and refused the surgical route and asked for a pessary. The only type my Surgery was qualified to fit was a ring and so that's what I went with...I was told that being a young married woman that's the kind I should go for anyway...In other words I could apparently have sex with it in position. I have never tried but I doubt very much that it would happen LOL as the position the pessary lies in would mean it would be in the way!
Anyway, I had to try 4 sizes of ring before I settled on a size that was big enough to stay hooked up behind my pubic bone and not fall into my vagina! The first ring I had fitted I skipped out of the doc's office so happy that the horrible bulging feeling was gone, only to get home and have it fall into my vagina the first time I visited the loo! I was very disheartened, but it turned out it was simply too small. I also had the discomfort in my rectum at first but this disappeared when I got the right sized one that fit properly.
I have since had a slight rectocele diagnosed by a consultant surgeon, but I think it was there all along to be honest as I felt the symptoms of that as soon as I found the cystocele. It does concern me sometimes that some women have had rectoceles or rectoceles worsen that they feel is directly attributed to the pessary, but for me the pessary at the moment gives me the freedom to live without having to think about prolapse. I am so busy with my small children at the moment that this is absolutely necessary for me... There will come a time though where I will be much more pro-active with my healing. I will be starting on some herbs, and when the kids are at school and I can set aside time in the day to rest I will try to be without the pessary more and more I think.
On good days I don't wear the pessary at all, but for busy days I find it is sweet relief.
My pessary is 80mm diameter and seems massive but if I relax when inserting and removing it and bend it in half as much as poss (it is quite flexible) then I can put it in and take it out quickly and with no discomfort.
Hope this helps,
Zoe x

Hi BaNa48, I found beeswax at hiveharvest.com. I haven't yet found anyone to tell me how to make a pessary from it, so I might have to find a new craft since I have two pounds of the stuff!

Hello BaNa48. I first read about the beeswax pessary on this site. The woman who posted stated that her midwife was going to make one for her. I can't find where she posted again but I'd really like to get the information from her. The idea was that the wax would soften and form to the shape of her body. I did an internet search with no luck. If you find any information, please let me know. Thanks

Hi Flora,

Thank you for your posting. It's reassuring to know that you have had a pessary for seven years. I think adjusting to using one is worth some experimentation (usually I slavishly follow medical advice so this is a new concept)and it's very interesting and helpful to read about other people's experiences here on this site.

I keep reading about "Christine's book". It's expensive - is it worth the money?

Annette.

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