Taking control

Body: 

So after a day of being in bitter tears, walking out and leaving my baby son with his father saying I can't cope, and frantically checking my parts to make sure every hour things aren't getting worse, I have now decided I need to take complete control of my body ASAP to ensure that things don't get any worse. Could somebody please point me in the right direction.

1) the posture - I can't seem to get my head around it at all.
Is it basically standing up straight shoulders back and down chin slightly dipped and arch your spine? Where can I find more info on this?
2) what else besides the posture do I need to practice? Is there anywhere on this site or YouTube that shows you useful exercises?
3) how do you enforce the posture sitting down/nursing/sleeping?
4) what diet is encouraged for rectocele
5) will somebody please tell me that this is temporary and I am not going to be plagued with these feelings of depression forever and obsessiveness over my lady bits. I am completely losing out on my babies first weeks of life due to how low this is making me feel.

Any support appreciated xx

1- posture. Look at the links surviving posted for you. Have you watched them yet? Lots of examples of the posture plus explanations. The lumbar curve at the base of the spine plus relaxed belly and boobs pulled up are all key. No slouching.
2- you can order the dvd bundle as recommended to you for pp mums for exercises but as everyone will tell you, at this stage just getting into posture will help at the moment. Standing sitting walking in posture.
3- try nursing side lying where possible. Rest. Your baby is so tiny. Lie how you like it won't affect things right now.
4 - diet is a very individual thing. Basically you've got to experiment with what works for you but be aware of falling into the fibre overload trap in a panic. Whole foods, cut the junk, lots of fluids.
5 - many pp women see huge improvements to the point they barely notice their 'celes any more. Only time will tell whether or not this will be you but you are in the right place to give this as good a shot as possible. Knowledge is power!
Night nursing and the baby needs to go back in his bed but I hope this helps in the meantime. Chin-up. We've all been in this shitty place but take try to read and watch as much as possible. I think you'll be much better when you calm down a little. Panic and stress are your enemies right now!
Xx

Now I don't mean to scold here, but your family deserves better than to have you freaking out over the state of your post-partum vagina. You had a baby and surely you expected that there would be some healing in your future. Hormones play a huge part in the crazy-making, but there can be a fine line between what is normal in that department, and the point where post-partum depression could be a factor. Miss D. gave you some great suggestions. Stop checking your vagina and get back to your family......the healing will come and you can do a lot to help it along with the right kind of knowledge and support (we have both of those right here). - Surviving