Checking

yes, I feel a change right before my period. which I've come to appreciate, since my cycles have never been regular. at least now I know what to expect.

My whole vulva, vagina, cervix and front wall feel kind of puffy and squishy too for the week before starting a period, and during the first four days. I feel like a big sponge full of water. Even when the bleeding lightens off I still seem to be oozing clearish fluid from nowhere in particular.

By the end of week one it is all up high(er) again, and all the abdominal bloating and squishiness is gone. I think it is a good idea to be familiar with how our bits feel, as we cannot see them easily, except with a mirror, then it's only the outside bits. I first learned self examination through Natural Family Planning, and it is now second nature to me. I don't know how else you can find out what's going on down there! The idea of a gyno knowing more about my bits than I do just doesn't make sense to me.

Cheers

Louise

My period just ended and I'm also noticing that I really suffer
the most for about a week after the period ends. Everything feels
loose, just a bit disconnected, my kegels even feel weak and
take more effort and I'm well beyond moist... I've taken to rolling up
my softest most worn hankies as a diaper of sorts. I'm making peace,
it doesn't have the razor-edge of humiliation anymore.
Acceptance has been a much nicer place to "hang out" these days.
I still don't and won't check myself, my barometer is enough. I really
don't think I could handle it. Once after the accident was enough for me.
I guess in part, it made me feel decidedly UNsexy. Like road-kill.
Zelda

It's about all I got. This has been quite a battle, this "finding
my acceptance" thing. It has been a transformation, a complete
juggle of priorities. In some ways I'm even More willful. Hard to imagine.
I will sit and elevate my feet, when I want.
I will ignore this and that mess without guilt.
I will not watch movies that are sad.
I will not take out the Garbage.

The new Paradigm ? No kidding.
Zelda

I thought you might have been a bit miffed at me for the
husband thread. Was worried I mighta sounded preachy ?
Just would hate the idea of you not realizing what you might be
risking, what I risked and nearly lost.
I've come to think divorce is the worst of tragedies for EVERYone
involved...if avoidable, if both people are basically good, but can't
"work it out"... so I guess I've got a bit of a cause going and Hope
I didn't come across as a damn know-it-ALL- Missionary. yuck.
Hugs,
Zelda

Hi Zelda and Anita

I have come to the conclusion that it is OK to be a 'difficult woman'. Hey, men were put on this planet to deal with it, even when we feel like roadkill (I too resonated with that one!). It is nice to be able to give yourself permission to just be yourself sometimes, after all that time we spend trying to figure out others and look after them. Ya gotta be a little careful that you are not offensive but a little self-interest doesn't go astray on the highway of life, lest we end up as, um ... roadkill?

Cheers

Louise

I stillcheck sometimes if I feel something weirdy down there - Guess am addicted to knowing ehere things are sitting etc

But not as much of late. Maybe if you feel less you check less?

I guess if we all felt nothing we wouldnt bother with checking or anything at all as we would all be too busy having a normal life etc

I am trying to not check at all. But sometimes I fail myself...

Sue

Look into the eyes - They hold the key!
http://www.bringmadeleinehome.com/img/maddy544x150Banner.jpg

Last month before my period I could barely stand. It felt like everything was falling down. A few days after my period, it all eased up...

Hi Anita

I had a period arrive unexpectedly yesterday. I was expecting it next week, from how my boobs felt. I had a feel under the shower this morning and discovered that, when I am in posture, my cervix is a full knuckle up from the entrance to my vagina. I can strain a little and make it come down to the entrance, but it pops back up again when back in WW posture. This is really wierd, as my cervix has for the past twelve months been at the entrance for the two weeks around Day 1. This is the first period I have had in maybe five years when I haven't had bloating and escaping pelvic organs for the two weeks surrounding Day 1.

There are only two possibilities I can think of that can account for this. One is the great unknown of impending menopause, which I have no idea about. I only know that hormonally and cervix size-wise I am very close.

The only other possibility is that over the last month or two I have been very consciously trying to relax my lower belly to make room for my bladder and uterus over my pubic bone. My lower belly seems to be getting bigger and bigger, which is a bit scary, but it feels really nice and I can feel something pleasurable happening in my vagina when I relax my lower belly. Of course the feeling is a 'sliding forward and up', when I think about it.

Anyway, I no longer wear clothes that fit closely around my belly (unless they have plenty of stretch, so it is hardly noticeable to anybody except DH and me. I think about all those lucky women in the 1950's fashions with their voluminous gathered skirts, that they later recycled into body hugging shifts in the 1960's. I detested that full skirt fashion during the 1960's but would welcome its return now. I am a great sarong wearer during the warmer months, and add dance pants and big floppy jumpers in cold weather. Oh yes, there are my old Ugg boots in winter too (carrying massive amounts of silver duct tape that hold them together). I am truly a sight to behold in my full domestic glory!!! But by Geez, am I comfy?

So I'll keep you posted to see what happens next period.

Cheers

Louise

Hi Anita

You are right, you know! Why do we need to ask what is going on in our bodies. All those books tell us all about our lungs and guts and brains and blood and stuff but nobody mentions what happens to a uterus and surrounds during a menstrual cycle. It is as if it is secret business known only to doctors, who don't know either, because they learned all they know in medical school, and were too busy learning about diseases to learn about health. Why is it so darned hard to find out!!!!

I visited my family doctor and had an internal exam the day before my period a couple of months ago. I asked her how big my uterus was and she said, "Pretty small". This may be because I am near menopause, but it may be that the uterus itself is not what causes all the bloating and bigness that seems to be there. And we think the uterus is so big just before a period, as if it is a bag of blood that will slowly leak out over a few days (the heaviness and bloating). However, I'm sure it is not. Sure, there is endometrium in there, but it has nothing implanted in it, and even the diagrams I have of a 6 week pregnancy show what looks like only about 2mm of endometrium, and I am sure that would only fill a thimble when it left the uterus. The extra blood comes from the capilliaries under the endometrium as it breaks down, and there is a lot of clearish fluid too. It must just keep oozing out until all the endometrium is gone and the uterus has gone back to pre-ovulation state. I have read that average menstuation is about a cupful, which would make the uterus quite big if all that volume was inside it before menstruation. So maybe the uterus is still quite small before normal menstruation, and the uterus and vagina just acts as a big sponge that collects all that spare fluid in the pelvic cavity and drains it out. Why doesn't somebody teach us this stuff?? Perhaps nobody knows! Seriously. Masters and Johnson were the first people to actually study what happens in the body during sex, and that was during the 60's. There is lots written about the hormones of the menstrual cycle but little about the physical bits. I bet that is because the hormone research was done by a pharmaceutical company developing the Pill, and now producing products for the assisted reproduction industry. So much for pursuit of knowledge! We have to find out ourselves, because nobody has a monetary investment reason for finding out for us.

On a different tack, I'm just wondering how you think tampons are going to upset everything? I would be might p#$$ed off if somebody told me not to wear tampons with a prolapse. Surely if pessaries are OK, tampons would be OK too? I would love to be able to retain tampons but alas, not so. The jini just spits 'em out again. Anyway, with my cervix living where it does these days the tampon would be above the cervix and not much use at all for mopping up! ROFL

Cheers

Louise

ATS, I feel the same way. I was wearing tampons and feeling like it just wasn't a good thing. before I got pg I had switched to the ob tampons, they are smaller and easier to insert (behind the cystocele so they don't fall out) but still, removing them felt like it was dragging everything along.

then I got pg, and knowing that you cant wear tampons pp, and that I hate paper/plastic pads, I made some cloth pads. the 'ick factor' was alot lower than I had thought and now I'm using them for periods. I must say, I'm liking them. in fact, they are so pretty and fun that its the silver lining to menstruating. at least I can use my pretty pads.

the ones I have now are all flannel, backed with a waterproof fabric, but the next batch I make will be topped with velour. I just made the baby some velour diapers and I got jealous, lol.

I wash my cloth pads with the baby's diapers. I rinse them first and I've had no staining. I have about 15 pads, I wash every day, to every other day.
you can make them with wings, using either velcro or snaps, but I hate wings so I use double stick tape on the back of the pad.
there's loads of free patterns available online, but I traced a disposable pad for mine.
as for fabrics, you can just use flannel. if you want a waterproof backing, you can use windpro fleece or something called PUL which you can order online.

you could try googling 'cloth pads free sewing patterns'
or go to www.diapersewingdivas.com and look at the stuck stickies in the 'hot seamstress mamas' forum. they have lots of links for free patterns, tutorials, recommended fabrics etc.

its a quick, fun project, but I warn you......its addictive.

My babies were big pee-ers so I always had to put an extra liner in their cloth diapers. Those liners ended up becoming my pads. An empowering and useful thing to do with used pads is to soak them in a bucket of water and use the blood to water your plants or garden! They love it.

I've thought about doing that, stella. maybe once the kids are a bit older and not prone to dunking things in buckets of water. I can just imagine the bloody mess :::::::shudder:::::::

I thought I was the only Nut that did this !
I think there is something sacred about menstrual blood.
I collect orchids, esp. species, and they love "runoff".
Zelda

I knew we were like minded, Zelda!

I use diaper doublers too! I recently bought a serger and fixed some old flanel tshirts and some rip stop nylon to them!! they are awesome! I just toss them in the washwith the diapers or a load of darks!